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I need your opinion

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by wannabe_guitarist, Aug 18, 2016.

  1. wannabe_guitarist

    wannabe_guitarist Fapstronaut

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    Hi fellow Fapstronauts

    I have a small query, during nofap, is it natural to be irritable and get annoyed really fast??
     
  2. acceptance&surrender

    acceptance&surrender Fapstronaut

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    Totally normal. If you believe you have a problem, you believe that porn addiction is real. Just like any other addiction, there is going to be withdrawal.

    For me I have found that being irritable runs along with guilt. For whatever reason expressing anger (even if just in your imagination) towards the people and things around me seems like a solution. I guess I feel like focusing on any kind of problem anywhere outside of me will help me forget the problem inside of me.

    I don't mean to say that you should focus on what's wrong with yourself, I don't even mean to imply that there must be something wrong with you. But I have an addictive personality, and not only with porn but with lots of things does irritability come for me with withdrawal. Hell, even after watching netflix for long enough I find a sense of guilt for doing so turning into a generally irritable mood.
     
  3. wannabe_guitarist

    wannabe_guitarist Fapstronaut

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    Ohh thank you for the reply. because actually this is the first time I am getting this feeling, I was actually contemplating of going back to PMO, but the success stories here and the different videos on youtube made me to stop. So there is light at end of the tunnel then?
    So how did you channelize these feelings and any type of tips are welcome?!
     
  4. wannabe_guitarist

    wannabe_guitarist Fapstronaut

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    "Man is made or unmade by himself; in the armory of thought he forges the weapons by which he destroys himself; he also fashions the tools with which he builds for himself heavenly mansions of joy and strength and peace"
    That thought is powerful!!
    Thank you for sharing!!
     
  5. acceptance&surrender

    acceptance&surrender Fapstronaut

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    You are welcome for the reply. It makes me very happy to hear that this website and some videos have made you wonder about something gained through quitting porn.

    Yes, there is absolutely light at the end of the tunnel. But it will not always look like that, so understanding the light on the other side alone will not solve the desire to use porn.

    Whenever I feel guilty or irritable, I try to stop and think about why, and about whether or not I have the power to do anything about it. You could call this meditation.

    You're already doing the best thing you can do: reach out for help. There is so much to talking to others who share the same experience as you. It's unfortunate that this is easy to forget or underestimate the value of.

    One of my biggest breakthroughs in recovery from porn was when I took Mark Queppet's advice on writing a couple things down. If you want to understand what you are thinking when you feel a desire to stop using porn, or why you're thinking it, this is the best method of finding out that I have come across. Get a pen to paper and answer these questions as honestly as you can:

    1. How is porn hurting your life?
    2. How will quitting PMO (Porn-Masturbation-Orgasm) lead you to a life that you want?
    3. What are some things that have convinced you to use porn?
    4. What are the reasons that these excuses aren't rational?

    Answering those questions by writing them down revealed to me so much more than I imagined it would. It gave me so much more strength in the face of urges to use. This might be one of your strongest weapons against porn. I wouldn't recommend limiting your time on this, but if creating a set amount of time to do it will help motivate you, spend 15 minutes. You might be surprised about how much can happen in a quarter of an hour.

    I would be happy to compare answers with you (I still have mine, which I wrote 2 and a half years ago!), just message me if you are interested in doing this.

    That has got to be the best thing I could ask you to do, but a couple other small things that help me a lot are clicking the panic button (don't worry, you don't actually have to be panicking to read/watch some awesome people say some awesome things), journaling in general (maybe once a week, or when you are feeling overwhelmed) somehow simply writing down what is in your head allows you to deal with it far better than otherwise, and lastly, maybe try starting every day with meditation. Meditation is a vague term that can mean a lot of things. One thing that helps me a lot is sitting somewhere comfortable and quiet in the morning and watching your thoughts drift by for 5 minutes. You don't have to think about anything specific, in fact, try not to control your thoughts. Just be aware of what they are.

    I was amazed by how much those little things helped me. I hope they have a similar effect on you.



     
  6. wannabe_guitarist

    wannabe_guitarist Fapstronaut

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    I will definitely do that!! I have my exams starting from today, once I am done I'll definitely message you!! I guess by doing that I'll probably come to know more about myself as well!!

    Thank you for being so gracious. I'll message you soon after I am done with my exam!
     

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