I pray for painless death.

Please, let me never wake up again. My parents are gonna be sad, but sooner or later they’re gonna feel better without me, they won’t have to deal with me anymore and my shitty emotional swings. I’ve harmed my mom so much with my ruthless words and breakdowns, she will be sad, but still she will feel better eventually. My brother will be devastated, but it’s okay, no one will be there to annoy him and curse at him. My friends (very few) will be shocked, but eventually they will forget about me, as they should with someone like me. Girl I like, will be shocked, but she will giggle after my death and forget about me the next day. My ex, will be crying like crazy, but no one will be there to break her heart anymore and play with her feelings, eventually it will be better for her. Because, that’s how it should be, I bring nothing to this world except misery, toxic thoughts, depression and despair. Lack of personality, charisma, addictions this is me. That’s the whole me, God doesn’t want to hear such bastard like me, and I understand that. I just pray and hope for a quick ending, so the world won’t have to bother with me anymore. I just can’t take it anymore, I don’t have strength for NoFap, reboot logs, prayers, improving myself, etc. I’m too weak and too tired. I’m sorry everyone and I’m sorry God, this will be my final post on here. I give up. The end.