I should just quit NoFap

There are days we all fell like this, it is not because of this only, but in other aspects of our lives. Retreat, recount your goals and odds, and get back in action.
10 days is actually pretty respectful streak. That's like 3 reboots per month, it is a good stuff, some people can't keep up 1 day, that don't practice NoFap philosophy.

 

Never stop trying.

Even as you fail, build yourself up, little bit by little bit.

 

Glad you are not quitting nofap. It’s pmo you will quit.
Think about a child learning to walk. How many times it falls? Thousands. In the end it will walk.

 

Well what if you stopped being pathetic? You may take a step back and ask yourself what failure actually means to you and why you seem to need it?
Some people keep failing to be seen failing. Or they try to desparately confirm their own negative self-perception of being a total loser.

 

I have no will power at all either. In fact, willpower will probably not work.

Allen Carr defines a willpower method as any method that requires a sacrifice.

Willpower - Delaying gratification for the purpose of obtaining a greater reward.

Willpower never worked for me. It sounds like it's not working for a lot of people on here.

For me, I had to stop thinking that I was making a sacrifice by quitting porn.

I also stopped thinking that I could do it on my own. Especially since quitting porn also involved quitting all P-subs. That includes all lust and fantasy. So I needed help, a lot of it. Support groups, forums, and God.

 

Given where you are right now, your best shot is continuing the fight. Keep working on the strategies. Find out the cue which led to the relapse and work towards handling it. Keep hustling. That's the only way forward

 

Regarding quitting porn at any cost - what I've done that's worked is a digital detox. Downgrading/locking down phones and locking down the computer.

Regarding regaining self-esteem, I do daily affirmations. They're phrased in terms of already being where I want to be. "e.g. I am loving, confident, energetic and productive".

Hope that helps.

 

A few things: one, yes. Take the pressure off yourself and dont try to compulsively quit PMO. It creates fear and puts your overall in a worse place.

Each failure can be a stepping stone to your success as long as you learn from it. Look back and try to understand why you did what you did. I recommend my method: a FAP journal.

F: Frequency

• When was the last time you fapped in relation to this one. How many hours, days, or weeks ago was it. If there was two sessions back to back, then estimate the time between ejaculations

A: Ask why?

• What was the trigger or the motivation to get you to the point that you fapped?
• Some common triggers include: bored, lonely, to help focus, low energy, high energy, hungry, stressed, angry

P- prevention

• This may be a bit early but I want to get you in the process of thinking "how can I prevent this from happening in the future?". There is no wrong answer here.
  • Eg: was bored in the morning, reached over to phone and before you know it I was PMO-ing. Next time I'll put my phone outside my bedroom. Even if it doesn’t work it changes the way your mind thinks and that's good.

Try that and report back

 

Excellent and comprehensive tool, and I fully agree with the mindset that you've introduced it with!

 

What’s SSA social security administrator? Or that SAA powerless cult of predators?

 

At first I thought maybe sub-Saharan African (ancestry dot kom DNA group), but that doesn’t really make sense in this context. He must mean same sex attraction. Definitely not social security or sex anonymous. Hope this helps!