I start fearing that being an introvert made me miss out on life

Discussion in 'Off-topic Discussion' started by I Hate PMO, May 20, 2022.

  1. I Hate PMO

    I Hate PMO Fapstronaut

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    I started to think recently "What fulfills you?"

    And, to be honest, I always wanted to be outgoing, drink alcohol or at least some kind of brewage, smoke cigarettes (I know, it sounds stupid), not necessarily be in a relationship but definitely have lots of outgoing friends, be into new experiences like concerts, clubs, or just chilling with your pals, drinking a beer, smoking a cigarette and watching the sunset over the landscape.

    I mean, I could do all of this on my own, but I would be like Mr Bean.

    And I think it's just kind of sad. I'm 24, so I'm not "that young" anymore, but it's still not too late.

    But the point is, that I've always been awkward, introverted and just anxious, being afraid of every human being out there.

    I definitely believe that if I'd live such "outgoing life", I'd definitely have less urges to PMO, because "The moments are too great to be ruined by PMOing"

    I really don't know how to deal with that. I thought about lucid dreaming.
     
    GigglingTrout and m9damn like this.
  2. CommonUser

    CommonUser Fapstronaut

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    I've had the same thoughts, and the answer is that all that you want is simply overrated. You created a perfect imagine in your mind of these scenarios where in reality, you would see they are nothing special.

    I am not telling you to not try it, but you would see it is just another activity.
     
  3. TakingTheSteps

    TakingTheSteps Fapstronaut

    Please don't do that. Lucid dreaming comes with a lot of dangers that I unfortunately can't even mention here without probably being censored by mods, or mocked by everyone. But regardless, this isn't a solution to your problems anyway.
     
  4. I Hate PMO

    I Hate PMO Fapstronaut

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    There are dangers of lucid dreaming? I'm very curious to know which
     
  5. I Hate PMO

    I Hate PMO Fapstronaut

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    Not only perfect image, during the last 5 years I've even created a perfect world with cities, friends etc where I can be my alter ego who is like the complete opposite of me (character wise). That's also why I came up with lucid dreaming, as I already know what I'd like to dream about

    I just have the feeling that outgoing people know how to enjoy life more, while I'm sitting in my room ruminating about the past and worrying about the future, having nearly an existential crisis every day.

    It's not about seeking dopamine and pleasure, but about fulfillment. I don't feel fulfilled with what I'm doing, which is staying at home and studying.
     
  6. CommonUser

    CommonUser Fapstronaut

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    Well then find something that fulfills you and then do it.
     
  7. I Hate PMO

    I Hate PMO Fapstronaut

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    It would require me to be outgoing, but I'm introverted. Also, it would require me to drink alcohol, but I don't want to become an alcoholic. It would require me to maybe not smoke but use some sort of nicotine, which I don't want to get addicted to. It would require me to get a motorcycle and ride, but I don't have one nor do I have a motorcycle drivers license.
     
  8. CommonUser

    CommonUser Fapstronaut

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    Dude there are other stuff you can do besides stuff related to your fantasy. You don't even need to leave your home to find one, you have the internet to find a new passion.
     
  9. TakingTheSteps

    TakingTheSteps Fapstronaut

    Spiritual dangers. It's a huge door that opens you up to demonic stuff. There is lots of documented cases of this. But that's all I'll say about it, lest the mods shut me down for "proselytizing" or something.
     
  10. I Hate PMO

    I Hate PMO Fapstronaut

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    But I hate the internet. I want to go out and experience the world
     
    GigglingTrout likes this.
  11. I Hate PMO

    I Hate PMO Fapstronaut

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    You can write me a private message, I'm really curious about that, especially of what cases you're talking about
     
    TakingTheSteps likes this.
  12. CommonUser

    CommonUser Fapstronaut

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    Then do that at your own pace. You don't have to be extroverted, just go outside.
     
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  13. I Hate PMO

    I Hate PMO Fapstronaut

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    Even just going outside doing nothing not even partying is a huge step for me. Anything outside of my room is not my comfort zone
     
  14. TakingTheSteps

    TakingTheSteps Fapstronaut

    Sometimes we have to put ourselves out of our comfort zones to attain what we want to attain.

    When I was looking for a partner, I remember deciding to go to a new church that was much bigger, with more people my age, and I knew nobody there. I forced myself to go to social events, even though I was extremely uncomfortable with it and didn't know anybody. I even thought about bringing my best friend with me as a buffer, but I knew that if I brought her, I would just end up talking to her the whole night and I would never really make any new friends.

    It was really hard for me, but I made myself do things like that until I had a group of friends there and then I felt more comfortable. And bonus, I met my spouse and got married a year later.

    It's tough, but if it's a big enough priority for you, you can do it. Once you get in a habit of doing things outside of your comfort zone, it becomes easier. Maybe make a challenge for yourself, like a 30 day list of one small thing each day that you have to do that you aren't comfortable with. See how things feel at the end of the challenge.
     
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  15. GigglingTrout

    GigglingTrout Fapstronaut

    I was about your age, and I was always feeling the same. Too much time wasted playing games or being a hermit. Often turning down invitations and avoiding social stuff

    You could do what I did, take a big leap, and go off to teach English in Asia. See the world, meet new people, try new experiences
    Save up a little bit of cash first, and then head to Korea, China, Thailand, Japan, etc
    Download the meetup app and slowly-but-surely start attending more and more events. Try dating apps and meet different girls

    I'm still a bit introverted, but I've started to become more comfortable with myself. I've seen and done things that I never would have if I had stayed in my home state. I've created some memories that really made me feel like I've lived my life

    But I know it's not an easy thing to do. And it's certainly not for everyone
     
  16. Hi,

    I have been to the concerts, the clubs, and I went drinking, smoked cigarettes, partied, did drugs, and spent time with tons of outgoing friends.

    Guess what?

    I still jack off to porn.
     

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