I start today: Day Zero - Lets go

Velox X

Velox X

Fapstronaut
Hello,

I am new to this community, I just joined. I have been addicted to porn since I was 11. I am now in a relationship with my partner, we are married, and Porn has taken a tole on our relationship. My partner used to normalize porn, like many of us have. Until, they did more research and realized the effects it has. After many conversations, and check-ins, today, I realized, Porn will destroy me, my relationship, marriage, and having future kids. I want to be a good father and husband. Porn, will not get in the way of this. I did not realize how strong pornography is and how it has effected me psychologically throughout my entire life. My family neglected to help, did not do anything even knowing I watched porn. I do not blame them. It is a scar I am healing and one that is now about healing now, improving myself, creating goals, and my first goal is to star today, right now. I start today and I am using techniques, joining Islam and Buddhism and not just to help with pornography, for my personal spiritual growth, but to create structure, goals and to help fight the addiction. I am also in counseling.

Thank you everyone for your support, love, accountability and guidance.

Has anyone joined the monthly subscription, and if you have, has anyone had success with the groups and calls.

With compassion and gratitude and love

V
 
welcome bro!

Great mindset to spiritually awaken - that is the only way that I know for actual freedom.
 
Welcome my man. I’m going to move this to the correct section for you.
 
Velox X said:
My family neglected to help, did not do anything even knowing I watched porn. I do not blame them.
Click to expand...

Wow, you just blew me away with that, because you described an aspect of my story down to the 'T'! My family knew about my problem when I was child , but said or did nothing about it. Did nothing, because they didn't have the emotional capacity to deal with it.

It's a little sad in hindsight. I mean, just imagine if one of them came up and kindly said with an open warm heart "Hey, this isn't helpful, let's look at ways we can find healthier more enjoyable things to do, or, hey, are you unhappy? Do you feel you are being listened to? Do you feel unheard? Ignored? Unsupported? Is there anything you feel you would like to say to us...?

But that wasn't the path I was meant to live. This experience is. I'm learning to forgive my family for not being there for me in many many ways, and I'm learning through teachers like Dr Wayne Dyer that the best way to accept people who we feel have let us down is to acknowledge that "they were doing the best they could given the conditioning of their lives".

In some instances that can be a really big ask, but the more I meditate on this Truth and open myself to understanding, the more accepting I become. The more accepting I am about something the easier it becomes to move into the realm of forgiveness. It's not a quick fix process. It takes a concerted to embrace thoughts like this. Change doesn't come easily. It never does, but as the old adage goes: No pain no gain!

The fact is, they were just doing their best. Just like I am now.
 
Welcome to you!
There is a life waiting for you that's far, far more fulfilling than what you've ever known.
Not easy, leaving your banana alone, or pickle as the case may be.
But worth it!
Keep strong and please keep sharing as you go along.
Thanks for this post, it made me smile.
BORAX
 
Velox X said:
Hello,

I am new to this community, I just joined. I have been addicted to porn since I was 11. I am now in a relationship with my partner, we are married, and Porn has taken a tole on our relationship. My partner used to normalize porn, like many of us have. Until, they did more research and realized the effects it has. After many conversations, and check-ins, today, I realized, Porn will destroy me, my relationship, marriage, and having future kids. I want to be a good father and husband. Porn, will not get in the way of this. I did not realize how strong pornography is and how it has effected me psychologically throughout my entire life. My family neglected to help, did not do anything even knowing I watched porn. I do not blame them. It is a scar I am healing and one that is now about healing now, improving myself, creating goals, and my first goal is to star today, right now. I start today and I am using techniques, joining Islam and Buddhism and not just to help with pornography, for my personal spiritual growth, but to create structure, goals and to help fight the addiction. I am also in counseling.

Thank you everyone for your support, love, accountability and guidance.

Has anyone joined the monthly subscription, and if you have, has anyone had success with the groups and calls.

With compassion and gratitude and love

V
Click to expand...
It will be great to see you get ride from this addiction. Allah help you to find right path.
 
Welcome @Velox X I hope you overcome this obstacle and I wish to you and your family the best!
PeacefulmindFearlessheart said:
My family knew about my problem when I was child , but said or did nothing about it. Did nothing, because they didn't have the emotional capacity to deal with it.
Click to expand...

I had the same experience, all I got was a direct "we know what you are doing." which it probably only worsened the situation. Thank you for being exhaustive, I especially appreciate that Dr. Wayne quote, it really made me think.
 
Pillarman said:
I had the same experience, all I got was a direct "we know what you are doing." which it probably only worsened the situation. Thank you for being exhaustive, I especially appreciate that Dr. Wayne quote, it really made me think.
Click to expand...

Love the connection with you! Thanks for saying that! :)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top