I struggle to keep conversations going

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by ShadyPerson, Jul 2, 2020.

  1. ShadyPerson

    ShadyPerson Fapstronaut

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    I have a problem. I've been trying out online dating, but every time I get a girl's attention, it seems like the conversation turns dry very fast and then just dies. I'm not the loudest most social person, but I can keep conversation going with friends etc. people I already know, wether it's just some funny banter or some deeper conversation. But it's just so hard finding things to say to someone who I don't even know. Especially since girls on dating apps oftentimes don't really seem to put much of any effort into the conversation. Which I guess I understand since they get more attention on dating apps and thus have no incentive to try to make conversation with a guy if he can't first prove that he can make conversation too. Does anyone have any advice on how to learn to make better conversation that also would preferrably lead to some dates?
     
    Le 17 likes this.
  2. Le 17

    Le 17 Fapstronaut

    I would recommend checking out based zeus on Youtube. He helped me out with my online dating game and i believe he can help you too. How To Beast is also a good one but remember that it is a numbers game and a single girl might get thousens of matches, still keep your hopes up because i am sure you will find some matches :).
    Good luck
     
  3. DaneyPyotr

    DaneyPyotr Fapstronaut

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    Really nice recommendations, thank you :)
     
  4. p1n1983

    p1n1983 Fapstronaut

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    It's really easy. Girls LOVE to talk. Woman speaks 8000 words each day, man only 2000 in average. Woman that are interested in you over the rest of the guys in their online app will make the effort to keep the conversation going with you. If you are just one more guy in their app, they are not going to put any effort in it so you are going to keep it alive all by yourself and it's not going to be fun at all.

    So basically, talk to them. Ask them question to know them a little better. The ones interested in you will make the effort to keep the conversation going, the ones that don't will let the conversation get dry or die. Don't waste time with this woman, only with the ones that put the same effort as you to keep it alive and fun.
     
  5. ShadyPerson

    ShadyPerson Fapstronaut

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    Thanks, I'll try it out.

    Yeah, but I guess then my question is how to be interesting to women instead of being just one more guy. Or what should I talk about. Just talking to them clearly isn't working out for me all that well so that's really not an advice at all.
     
  6. I have no experience with online dating because I don't care.
    I am just wondering what kind of women even use these kind of apps?

    This is the way I see it:
    You might listen to gurus telling you how to improve your "game", whatever the hell that is,
    Or understand that a conversation is a ball game and you can't play it yourself alone and that this other person must also throw the ball back to you.

    I think you have just got unlucky and ran into some boring females but do whatever you want ofc.
     
  7. p1n1983

    p1n1983 Fapstronaut

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    You didn't get the point then. If you are just one more guy in her list, she is already not interested in you physically. Her attraction to you is just low, so no matter what you do, is going to be really hard to make her interested in you. You are going to work a lot to get her attention when her attention is going to be in other guys that are more attractive to her than you.
    My advice to you is to don't waste you time with girls like that, and invest it in girls that are as much interested as you in the beginning. Your dating experience will be a lot better, you will find out how much easy and enjoyable everything is when a girl is interested in you and you will never go back to work hard to try to date girls that are not into you.
     
  8. Homie it is not you, it a message that you are missing out on. Real conversations require looking and listening. Tell me how you are going to do that through an app?
     
  9. ahighertruth

    ahighertruth Fapstronaut

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    i find not watching porn for a week+ will make thoughts pop up much easier. a lot of times its not about keeping the convo flowing, but knowing how to react to it.
     
    DaneyPyotr likes this.
  10. Help_me_god007

    Help_me_god007 New Fapstronaut

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    When is the last time you Pmo'd? Go without pmo for a month and you will have so many questions popping out.

    Again its a cat and mouse game! You'll have to grab her attention and don't be needy. Feel like your asking the wrong questions or you just finding it boring.
     

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