I Wish I Had More Hobbies, but Nothing Grabs Me

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by Deleted Account, Apr 29, 2019.

  1. I have a strong desire to have a life full of interesting hobbies, that benefit my life in different ways. The problem, though, is nothing really seems to interest me. I lift weights, but I only do it because I force myself to. I take the dog for walks, but this too, is a chore for me. I bought a cheap guitar, a couple years back, and tried several times to force myself to play it, but this was always a chore. Even video games seem really boring to me, now. A lot of hobbies require a decent amount of money, something I don't have.

    I've gone on google several times and typed in: list of 100 hobbies and nothing really seemed interesting to me. I feel like I'm never going to find something I like, it'll just be a chore, something I force myself to do because it will benefit me once it's over with. Am I doing something wrong? Life seems so boring...
    Rpp70K and Asgardian36 like this.
  2. andi1987

    andi1987 Fapstronaut

    Yeah had the same "problem" myself. When I deleted all the porn from my hard drive, a friend asked me: "What do you do with all the free space?". I said "Fuck the free space. What do I do with all the free time?" :D

    I also took a look at some lists, but its really hard to find something new you can do on a daily basis and really is fun.

    Maybe we can find something together.
  3. Reborn_

    Reborn_ Fapstronaut

    I have the same problem.
    One thing I recommend is actually doing some of the activities on the list.
    For example, you may think drawing sounds boring, but when you actually test it, you find you really enjoy it.
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  4. That's a good idea! What kinds of "things" do you see value in? I was hoping for finding things that would be fitness related. I was thinking about getting a jump-rope. If I used this for 10min every morning, it would improve my mood for the day and maybe make me more interested in things. I'm wondering if maybe we do have interests, we just can't enjoy them because our brains are destroyed from P and M.

    I'm also wondering if maybe I should find more things that are fitness related. This way, I can have different options to pick from, if I'm bored of the same thing over and over again. Jump rope would maybe be one for me. I also have an old fishing rod. There's a lake, a short walk from my house. There's probably like 2 fish in the lake so catching one wouldn't be the goal. If I put weights in a backpack, grabbed my dog, and then relaxed for a couple hours with the rod, I could kill 3 birds with one stone. I was also thinking about getting a basketball and just practicing with that at the court near my house. These all address cardio, but I'm not sure how to find something different than lifting weights for strength and muscle size...

    Guitar bores me, but maybe a cheap keyboard would be a better option? I'd hate to spend money on it and have it collect dust like my guitar is...

    There's also a judo place near my house, but I can't afford this. We're still in the recession here and even finding a job flipping burgers part-time would be really difficult.
  5. Yeah, you're probably right. Maybe I should give them a chance.
  6. I’m in the same boat not only when it comes to hobbies but also when it comes to a career. I’m hoping that some clarity and sense of purpose will come from a life of sobriety.
  7. Pureplecity

    Pureplecity Fapstronaut

    This is just a guess but do you spend lots of time on social media, YouTube, Tv, video games? I’ll put it this way. Just like porn all those things I just said releases lots of dopamine and keep in mind we live in a time where we always have to be entertained and the entertainment is so good that anything else like playing sports, writing, reading, hunting, shooting, hiking etc is just so darn boring compared to it if we are perfectly honest. Most people don’t really have many hobbies they would rather sit at home and be entertained. I personally am addicted to YouTube and I actually get huge withdrawals from it. If you truly want to enjoy life to the fullest you’ll have to let all that entertainment go or atleast cut it down.
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  8. jarvyjarvison

    jarvyjarvison Fapstronaut

    Alright, this is just a thought. I've found that some hobbies are only enjoyable if you're learning how to do it from a good teacher. For instance, I didn't think I could "do" art until I was in art therapy and asked the teacher to walk me through step by step how to draw with chalk. When I was done, I was pretty impressed with myself lol. Same goes for music. "Teaching yourself" can be quite boring but learning from a good teacher and watching yourself incrementally improve over time can be very rewarding.
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  9. Rpp70K

    Rpp70K Fapstronaut

    me too, started several activity as Tennis and fitness...
    good feedback for dopamine, but clearly nothing as porn can give us immediate and easy pleasure

    the sad thing is that years ago before to start such porn shit , I was involved in so many project and crazy idea
    Deleted Account likes this.
  10. andi1987

    andi1987 Fapstronaut

    Yeah fitness/sports is always good. I do daily fitness (just some normal body weight training) for one hour a day for like 3 years. I did that even during my addiction. But the problem is that besides that I really need a hobby to sink into (like into porn before). Not in an addictive way. I mean doing sports/fitness is great but I can't do fitness for 4 hours; just wouldn't be healthy. I think you need some hobby to relax, too.

    I also started PC Gaming again because it's really another hobby I have since I'm young. And contrary to porn I can control this; or I don't even see the need to play for hours. But thats the point. I don't wanna just play PC or do any other hobby, so I don't start porn again. Because (to me) it seems a bit weird to say e.g. "Okay I played the guitar for 5 hours now, it actually wasn't fun. But at least I didn't watch porn." In the long term this wouldn't work for me.

    But at first I think it's just important to no overwhelm myself with hobbys. So I really will take my time to find something that fits my needs.

    What ideas for hobbys do you guys have? maybe we can make a list and inspire each other?
    Deleted Account likes this.
  11. SirErnest

    SirErnest Fapstronaut
    NoFap Defender

    Sounds like a little depression to me. Many people have it in the modern day.
    It's probably good to just give this nofap a good go and force yourself to do a few healthy things like exercise, meditation and reading. Almost regard them as a job; an investment for your future.
    Nothing wrong with seeing a counselor too.
    Deleted Account likes this.
  12. andi1987

    andi1987 Fapstronaut

    I agree with you. Could be symptoms of depression. But I for example have the same feeling like Superman is telling. Just without porn atm something is missing in my life. But I don't feel sad, lethargic or joyless. For me it's just hard to fill the time gap porn filled before. And that I think just takes some time. (But this is just how I feel; i don't say Superman feels the same way)
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  13. nickreb90

    nickreb90 Fapstronaut

    I have tried Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and I found it a great hobby. Challenging at first but is worth a try. I am in my 8th month now and things are starting to click now.

    Whatever you do, keep trying new things. You will eventually find what expresses yourself better

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  14. Davekransberg

    Davekransberg Fapstronaut

    I read 'The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*ck' by Mark Manson a few weeks ago.

    I remember a chapter where he tells the readers to stop relying on sudden, out-of-nowhere motivations to get things done and just do something instead. Yeah, just do something, anything, and before you know it, you'll see the impact of your work.

    A year ago, I woke up early in the morning and got bored. Then I saw a pair of dumbbells at the corner of my room, collecting dust. Then I thought, "Ok. Those dumbbells are meant to be used, Dave. Stop wasting your money to buy stuff that you'll barely use!"

    So I took a shot, and started lifting. I browsed the internet to find the right workout sets for me. Now, it became a weekly routine for me. I won't say lifting dumbbells became my hobby, but I certainly found fulfillment when doing it.

    My advice: just start doing random stuff, as long as it's legal and good for you. You'll never know what you'll find.
  15. Go to your local library. Go to the non-fiction section. Start wandering the aisles. Pick out 5 books - don't overthink it, just let yourself be impulsive. Bring them home and casually check them out, look at it as merely an experiment, a mental adventure. See if anything piques your interest. If it does, jot it down in a notebook for future reference. Do this a few times over the coming months. After a while, look back at your notebook, see if there are any common threads.

    For instance, do you tend to get curious about science books like astronomy or biology? Or maybe history? Or travel essays? Or mountain climbing? Or arts & crafts? It could be anything, or several things. Now, once you have a seed of an area that might be interesting, go explore it further, with books, but also movies/documentaries, classes, talking with friends, whatever, but also, if possible, out in the field. See where it leads you. Don't demand that you get an answer theoretically in your mind before you actually do something, get out there and see where the path leads. Be open to it. Be observant with how you're reacting to something. If it's boring, screw it, move on. But if it feels interesting, hmm, notice that, put it in your notebook, follow where it leads you.

    For instance, maybe you find an interesting book about rocks/geology, that leads you to take a hike nearby, you notice a cool formation, take a picture of it, and you discover a passion for landscape photography you didn't know you even had. A hobby worth getting involved with does take some effort, but it shouldn't feel like work most of the time, it should feel like something you're naturally drawn to, something which resonates within you while you're doing it. One clue you're on the right track is that time tends to flow faster when you're involved in something you care about, i.e. you may look up suddenly and say to yourself Wow did an hour just go by?

    For now your hobby is simply the quest to find a hobby, that is enough. Have fun, open your mind and heart to possibilities, and enjoy the gift of self-discovery which is one of the great experiences we can have in life.

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