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If you can't do it for yourself... (?)

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by NoPhap, Dec 29, 2013.

  1. Dec 29, 2013 #1
    NoPhap

    NoPhap Fapstronaut

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    I'm wondering what thoughts you might have on using someone else as motivation. Does the "If you can't do it for yourself, do it for someone else" motivation work? Is it healthy? I feel like I need to do this any way I can. I've failed a few times trying to stop PMO just for myself. On my current attempt, I've been putting my girlfriend out front for my source of motivation. Every time I think about getting out the computer to find porn, I picture her face. This has worked well for the past five days. She's been gone for about a week. She went home for the holidays and comes back tonight.

    I guess my actual question is, does it matter how we get beyond our addiction as long as it happens?
     
    NoPhap, Dec 29, 2013
    NoPhap, Dec 29, 2013
    #1
  2. Dec 29, 2013 #2
    Mark

    Mark Distinguished Fapstronaut

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    I've heard people say they did it for others in the end and if it works for them who's to say if its healthy or not. We all do it for ourselves ultimately because if we were not in good shape we would be no good to those who we are doing it for so ultimately its a paradox anyway! One of the reasons I quit drinking years ago is because I wanted to lead by example to my children but of course I did it for me too.

    If you've never read it before why not have a look at Ralph Waldo Emerson's 'Self Reliance' (you can get a really good modern translation by Adam Khan on-line- link is below if your interested) It's a really good/short read that helps off-set the nonsense our 'society's tells us about being selfish when we do things for ourselves, and I say off-set because surely its about achieving 'balance' and 'win-win' situations for both yourself AND those you love/care about? Just suggestions, wishing you and your partner all the very best:)

    http://www.youmeworks.com/self_reliance_translated.html
     
    Mark, Dec 29, 2013
    Mark, Dec 29, 2013
    #2
  3. Dec 29, 2013 #3
    Jason2

    Jason2 Guest

    Yes, doing good things for others is healthy! If I were you, I'd tape a small photograph of your girlfriend's face on your computer.
     
    Jason2, Dec 29, 2013
    Jason2, Dec 29, 2013
    #3

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