"I'll quit when I find a girl."

What you should be aware is that when you dont PMO your addict brain starts to give you 'racional' reasons to PMO. Its the Demon talking.

When i was a kid, lonely like you were , PMO was also there for me when i felt miserable about my life.

But nothing good came from PMO like we know.

The time has come for us to take better care of ourselves.

Good luck with you journey friend

 

The bad thing is this will hit what ever relationship you get into, it's not something you can just turn off, better to stop now then wait to ruin someone's life.

 

You make it seem in your post that it is priority to get a girlfriend with NoFap, and that the main reason you're doing NoFap is to achieve this end, if I'm not assuming too much. I've been in that scenario, and let me tell you, it's TORTURE.

But let me suggest something else, as you've probably heard before. You've got to do this for yourself first. But I can hear you say, "but I've been working on myself," which would be a valid answer. Clearly, though, if you are here, then you still have much self-improvement to do, which isn't a bad thing. Sometimes humble beginnings bring the best successes.

Give yourself the goal of abstaining from PMO for 30 days. After 30 days, you can decide, if you want to, that NoFap isn't for you and you can go back to whatever you were doing. But for these 30 days, you are not spending time on the internet--you're taking this energy and actively engaging in the world. This means you focus more on your work or school. This means you start journaling intensively or take up a hobby or personal project. All the while, feel this energy and what it is doing to you. Is it elevating you? Good, then there's no reason to lose it. After 30 days, you'll know, but you have to commit now to yourself and to us that you're going to experience what it feels like.

 

1st welcome to the forum. You are not alone on how you think. But as you come to realize it just a lie, your mind is telling you to keep doing PMO. Stop PMO, you'll find improved confidence, clearer mind better you.

 

I see your problems comes from pmo. So keep that streak going and keep the good habits and problems will be gone. At least old problems.

 

Quit, and then you'll find a girl.

 

“I’ll quit when I find a girl” it’s the same as saying porn is a direct substitute for a partner. Rate for yourself porn’s quality as your partner. It can’t hold you.

 

This is very stupid imho. I know in a second if I would like to have sex with a girl or not.

Wtf is a girl's friend anyways ? You have one single life, do not waste time on being friends with girls. Since you are a man and life is so much different for men than for women, there is zero chance for you to be better off in making friends with a girl than if you used the same time in making friends with another man.

It is a bad, wasteful deal for you - as you can only lose from it. Be it self esteem, be it only time that you did not invest otherwise, I am very skeptical about friendships with young girls.

I mean, a young girl gets approached often and has all these opportunities thrown at her, yet you delude yourself that you are somehow similar and somehow equal enough to be friends. Most girls that are happy to be just friends with you - are simply taking advantage of you without hesitating about morals and fairness. This is the harsh reality.

For example, how would it even go when you tell a friend girls that you like some other girl and she rejected you and you do not know why or how could you have done things differently. What sort of advice they give you, do they tell you that it is normal to be rejected since young girls have all these options and privilege constantly thrown at them ? Or do they lie to you that you just need to be yourself, personality is what matters - and that men and women are somehow all equal in spite of this ?

 

You will never get a girl if "you quit after finding her". You need to know that PMO addiction doesn't end once you find a relationship. In fact, it will ruin any relationship you create!
You need to control this addiction for you! And once you do quit it your physiological life will change, your lifestyle will improve, you will be able to gain more things widely, and then you will be able to create a good relationship!
Having no relationship was never an excuse to fap. This is like saying "keep fapping until you get married" and this is totally wrong!
You are doing this for you, yourself, not for the sake of anything else.

 

I'll echo the rest, I told myself when I was trying to quit a few years back that I would quit when I "found a girl." Let me tell you, it didn't happen. I kept scaring them off it seemed like, then I was depressed and as a result, you guessed it, more porn. The cycle continued. But now that I've given up porn, I'm starting to pick up on the clues that women throw me. It definitely feels better to know that I'm not immediately picturing getting in their pants.
But like the others said, don't make getting a woman your first priority. YOU should be your first priority. Get to know yourself first, learn new habits, start doing things you like. The girl YOU WANT will find her way into your life. Plus if you make it your mission to find a woman, you will come across as desperate, and trust me any woman will make you and run for the hills. I speak from experience on this one lol. Trust the process, and know that it will happen. Stay strong! You got this!

 

245? Holy shit

 

I have been masturbating for going on twenty years. I have been married for the last 2. I was a virgin before I got married by choice but it brought with it sexual frustration, which often manifested into PMO. While marriage hasn't cured me of my addiction (just look at my PMO tracker) I can say that it has helped immensely. Long gone are the days where I needed to masturbate just to get a nights sleep. Gone are the days where I couldn't talk to female colleagues without having my mind in the gutter.

"Quitting when I get a girl" is a naïve attitude. But I want people here to keep it in perspective that a girl, the right one, can help in your recovery.