[I edited this text in order to add a bit more depth to it so you can understand better about my story.] First of all, If I call myself handsome, it's because it's true and it's in no way to brag. And because of that, it makes my story even weirder than anyone else's. It's the first time I'm sharing this story with anybody, so it feels very weird for me. So, why the heck am I still virgin at 18 if I'm that handsome? Here is the full story: When I was younger, maybe around 9 years old, I had an accident that caused me the loss of one of my testicle plus the curvature of my penis. I don’t really remember what kind of accident it was. This period of my life is a bit unclear. Anyway, it’s not very cheerful. And that’s just the beginning. This accident resulted in me having no possibility to have sex with any girl and this shit will kill my confidence later on. That’s also where my porn addiction comes from. When you are 9 years old, sex isn’t involved yet, so this problem wasn’t a big deal after all, until middle school. Generally speaking, with middle school comes your very first masturbation and thus, the discovery of your body you know. What an amazement for me to see what was my dick. I don’t really know if this is really the cause of my low self-esteem and low self-confidence back then, but it surely is one of the main reasons. So at this time, I was shy, not confident in myself, and I couldn’t talk to anybody without blushing, especially with girls. I was really weak. But I still had 5 to 6 friends alongside, as well as a social life sometimes, which wasn’t the case during high school. So now comes high school, the worst part of my life and at the same time, one of the best. I’ll explain this later on. Anyway, in high school, things were getting worse, excepted that my confidence as well as my self-esteem were on the rise, thanks to self-development. But this thing isn’t so important when you can’t fuck girls and partying. Like I said before, I didn’t had any social life in high school and it’s still the case today. I only had two friends. Moreover, I hated school so much that I would end up crying in my bed from time to time. Everyday was a fucking nightmare. The boredom, nobody to talk to, stupid teachers that don’t give a fuck about you, everything sucked. This feeling was subdued by my rare interactions with my two friends, but still. Why do I didn’t had any social life? The answer is rather simple: having a social life was impossible for me because of my incapacity to fuck girls. A social life leads to meeting girls, and meeting girls obviously leads to having sex at some point, but I couldn’t do that even if I wanted. My two friends were outcasts in some way, so there wasn’t any risks with that. It feels horrible to see something that you can’t touch. Seriously, imagine a 9/10 guy standing here with a blank stare, while all the girls around are waiting for him to talk to them. A girl once talked to me but she rapidly understood that I wasn’t interested, even if I was, deep inside. This girl was a 8/10 and she had a great personality too. There was at least 5 girls in which I was interested during high school, but again, I couldn’t do anything. So this girl has given up with me and I understand her. It’s pretty weird to see someone like me doing nothing in order to make the conversation going, especially when you consider that this girl was fucking hot. Unlike the 14 years old me in middle school, I was able to talk to girls without any problems. No, the real problem was that it wasn’t possible for me to make a move. So at the end of high school, I was still virgin, no more friends, no social life and I never got into a party. I never kissed any girl too, I never got a hug from a girl and so on and so on. I still got my degree however, so at least I didn’t get through all this shit for nothing. If you see it like that, it’s pretty sad yes, until I talk about what happened in parallel. Back in the days, I thought of this problem as a fucking curse, but now I consider it to be a benediction too. Why? Because unlike many teenagers of today, I now know exactly what to do with my life at the age of 18. This thing turned me into a more introverted person which permitted me to discover myself. I did a lot of self-improvement during this period. I also found my true passions and what I love, I now have many goals to accomplish, my mindset has become a growth mindset and my vision of the world in a whole has change for the better thanks to hundred and hundred of hours spent on the Internet. While others were partying and having fun, I was working on myself and on my future. If I succeed in my goals (and I must), I will have all the fucking time I want to focus on my social life, fuck girls and have fun. Because yes, my problem is repairable, otherwise I wouldn’t call it a problem as it wouldn’t have any solutions. For my testicle, there are implants. And for my curved penis, there are many solutions too. I will repair all this mess later once I will have money. I didn’t talk about it with my parents as I’m really too afraid to do so and anyway, it’s a bit too late in my opinion. So what's next? Well, I will continue to work on myself and on my goals while rejecting every opportunity I have with girls, like I always did until now. I will also work on improving my social skills. Like this, I will not be a complete loser while entering the game for the first time. Anyway, I was really hesitant to talk about this with you all. But now it's done. God dammit, I must admit my story is really weird. Thanks for reading though. I just wanted to share this somewhere on the Internet to feel better.