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Im back, not sure for how long

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by SpencerPoot, Apr 2, 2018.

  1. SpencerPoot

    SpencerPoot Fapstronaut

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    Hey guys, haven't been here for a long time. 2015 was actually my last time here.
    not much has changed since then. I had a girlfriend for a short period of time in the summer of 2016 (still a virgin tho) and now im 23.
    Spontaneously, I decided to give nofap another go. even tho i came to terms that confidence has nothing to do with how many times i masturbate. But maybe im wrong.
    When I first started here, the longest I was able to go was 20 something days (I think it was 23 or 24). Now, I started last week, and I want to see if I can do more (hope to get to 90 days) I have some hard moments but im clear so far.
    If im already here, I wanted to ask:

    how do you shut off these thoughts? Because ill be honest, my virginity distracts me sometimes. Im a student now, and every now and then I think of how much I want to have sex already (and that was before I restarted nofap, so I figure it will be worse when we come back from the break).
    I figure it would be much easier if I could just ignore these thoughts or not thinking about it from the first place. So, how do you shut off distracting, sexual thoughts?
     
  2. jest

    jest Fapstronaut

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    You shut them or any other thought off by thinking about something else.

    You can't shut thoughts off, that's what your mind does - it thinks. Your body is programmed to do things and it'll keep doing them, the more you resist something the worse it gets.

    So practice mindfulness, deviate your attention from your thoughts by becoming a spectator inside your head - "these are thoughts I'm having, but it doesn't mean I have to do anything about them".
     
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  3. Player 1

    Player 1 Fapstronaut

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    For me: discipline.
    Taking conscience that it's destructive and changing your habits on a daily basis; find anything you can spend your energy in to become better: doing sport / working out, going out, read, increasing your knowledge... Plenty of people also meditate and say that it's good for mind too (haven't tried)

    Primary drives are strong though. Laziness will always side with the urge if you don't do anything to fight it. A relapse can happend in no time so be focused on your objectives.

    Stay up man.
     
    Last edited: Apr 2, 2018
    SpencerPoot likes this.
  4. SpencerPoot

    SpencerPoot Fapstronaut

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    Thanks!
    damn, I do need to work out a little.

    Also, I forgot to include this, but in case you lost your virginity at a "late" age (or haven't yet) how did you/do you face it?
     
  5. Player 1

    Player 1 Fapstronaut

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    I haven't yet at 21, I always used to be mentally too weak and socially anxious to attract any woman, screwed up a lot of opportunities too...

    You should not be preoccupied by that virgin statut. Just remember that all the hard work and restrictions will pay one day or another to get the life you really want, then the women will naturally be attracted.
     
    Last edited: Apr 2, 2018
  6. SpencerPoot

    SpencerPoot Fapstronaut

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    I guess you're right. It's just, from the group of friends I mostly hang out with, I was left as the only guy who is a virgin. I know that it shouldn't bother me, and perhaps I over react, but it does bother me from time to time, especially when they start talking about. Guess ill just try to make the best of it.

    For anyone else who is watching this thread, how do you shut off distracting, sexual thoughts? or in case you lost your virginity at a "late" age (or haven't yet) how did you/do you face it?
     

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