I'm either in a flatline or i'm asexual

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Rebootcel, Dec 15, 2018.

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  1. Rebootcel

    Rebootcel New Fapstronaut

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    I'm a 27 year old virgin, with no friends/social circles in real life. I would say i'm average looking 4 to 5/10 but i should really start lifting since i'm pretty scrawny. I'm currently on day 57 hard mode and i never got this far on a reboot before. I have no desire for PMO and just the mere thought of it makes me depressed. At the same time i don't have any sexual desire to meet a girl and have a one night stand or whatever, it could be because i never had sex and that i have gotten used to this lonely type of monk life. I just want love, like in a relationship. I have experienced it before but that was 6 years ago and it only lasted for a month, and when i was going to bed with her i couldn't get it up, not sure if that was porn induced, performance anxiety or if i'm asexual. During these past 6 years i could have probably gotten a new GF but the loss of interest always striked me, probably caused by PMO and other distractions.

    Also i never got sexually attracted to vanilla porn. Ever since i was 12 i only watched specific type of porn, i'm not gonna go into detail but atleast it was involving women, a fetish since the beginning so to speak. I'm attracted to women but i don't get hard whenever i see them in real life, only a very few times. The only positive things i've noticed on this streak is morning/night woods, a little more energy, less headaches/social anxiety etc, but my penis is completely dead during the day, it was before too when i was on PMO unless i was thinking about PMO.

    I don't expect this reboot to cure me but atleast it's worth a try. Being deprived of love/relationship for 6 years could make it even more difficult to get into it again. As i get closer to 30 my testosterone and libido is also slowly dropping. There's no turning back, i never get urges now and i have forgotten what PMO was like. My goal now is to find true love whether it takes 6 months or 3 years, i have hope in this recovery.
     
  2. I found a love when I was 35... tell me about deprivation :) u are good, go on, you have a good plan so stick with it
     
    Atlanticus likes this.
  3. Rebootcel

    Rebootcel New Fapstronaut

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    Sounds good. I will see what happens.
     
    Atlanticus likes this.
  4. Mattew

    Mattew Fapstronaut

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    Wow, this post gives me a little hope...

    You mean you find your first girlfriend at 35?
     
  5. 1st real longterm relationship with a pure love and regular sex, yes.
    It just took cca 100 days of hardmode for me to get that - and what a Gift it was.
    Plus with her, I cured my PIED, heart, learned to love etc.
    Good luck, you got this!
     
    u376, WalkingForward and Atlanticus like this.
  6. Mattew

    Mattew Fapstronaut

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    I don't think i got this, but thanks so much for the encouragement :D
     
  7. It all in the mind, you got this! Rest will follow.
    Imagine you already have it, and than you will have it.
     
  8. inaluciddream

    inaluciddream New Fapstronaut

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    Ride out the storm my friend!
     
  9. u376

    u376 Fapstronaut

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    Man .. this is very inspiring for all of us
    Thanks.
    I am going to start my monk mode from 30th
    And I am gathering these kind of motivations
     

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