I'm on the verge of suicide

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Makingitthistime, Oct 24, 2020.

  1. Makingitthistime

    Makingitthistime Fapstronaut

    Please help me. This is a scream for help.I'm seriously contemplating suicide.. I made a post saying I'm about to go insane. And it's happening. I'm insane at this point. Internally I'm completely broken and destroyed. From the outside you can see me calm. But you have no idea what is going on inside me. I'm crying. I need help. I lost all control over my mind and my life. I can't stop my addiction . I have OCD. I'm retarded. I don't know who I am anymore and what the hell is going on. I want to die. I want all this insanity to stop. Please help me out of this with anything. Or recommend me the easiest less painful way to kill myself.
    RockyRocky, Starman123 and Toni7 like this.
  2. Are you alone? If you're around people, even though you're not able to communicate what's going on inside of you, it'll put you in a different headspace. Try to meet up with somebody if you can.
  3. Hello friend, I want to tell you that I am here to help you. I came back from retirement as I was gonna delete my account. I came back just for you. And I can understand that things have been hard for you lately. And I dont really know you but if we were in the physical world, I would probably give you a hug and help you. As a fellow human being it is my responsibility to help others. You are a living breathing human being and you deserve to live no matter what you have done.

    Now listen to me carefully, I am gonna tell you things that will immediately make you feel better mentally.

    1. First of all, please please please quit all social media and news media right away, these things will slowly consume your soul and you have no idea how precious your soul is. News and social media are meant to depress you and this is how they keep you coming back.

    2. The media will tell you that the world is becoming hell but that is completely opposite of what is true. This world is a very beautiful place. Just imagine all of the things that you can have. Just imagine holding the hands of your beautiful wife. Just imagine travelling the world and going on adventure with your friends. And yes, you will have all of that if you just make the right plan and go after your dreams.

    3. This is something which I listen to too, whenever I feel suicidal. Just close your eyes and relax your body and listen to this. Just focus on the music and nothing else. I would also recommend you to go into the comment section of this video too, and read the comments because they will give you a lot of positivity and hope :

    And I am going to be praying for you right now. Because you have every right to live a beautiful and amazing life. And remember, your soul is precious. Good luck friend.
  4. G77

    G77 Fapstronaut

    I'm able to directly talk to you whenever you need bro im here for you, do you have telegram?
  5. Cartographer

    Cartographer Fapstronaut

    Hey dude,

    Thank you for reaching out. It is difficult to seek help when you feel as though it is your responsibility to shoulder all of the weight at once. We are here to help. @Chris_Cactusblossom made a great point, and if you rather not meet in person with someone due to covid, I would say some social interaction (even a video chat with someone you know) might be healthy.

    @The Homelander makes some great points too. I personally had been holding onto social media as an excuse to keep up with people that I had not spoken to in ages. Instead I was plagued by all of the hate in the world which just brought me lower.

    I'm happy to share my experiences with you if you would like to hear them. Below is a story that I found to be very helpful when I was going through dire straights (I was suicidal for a bit and 2 of my friends from the Marines have since killed themselves).

    - A Senior NCO went by and the Soldier with PTSD called out for help. The Senior NCO yelled at, told him to suck it up dig deep & drive on, then threw him a shovel. But the Soldier with PTSD could not suck it up and drive on so he dug the hole deeper.
    A Senior Officer went by and the Soldier with PTSD called out for help. The Senior Officer told him to use the tools your Senior NCO has given you then threw him a bucket. But the Soldier with PTSD was using the tools his Senior NCO gave him so he dug the hole deeper and filled the bucket.
    A psychiatrist walked by. The Soldier with PTSD said, “Help! I can’t get out!” The psychiatrist gave him some drugs and said, “Take this. It will relieve the pain.” The Soldier with PTSD said thanks, but when the pills ran out, he was still in the hole.
    A well-known psychologist rode by and heard the Soldier with PTSD cries for help. He stopped and asked, ” How did you get there? Were you born there? Did your parents put you there? Tell me about yourself, it will alleviate your sense of loneliness.” So the Soldier with PTSD talked with him for an hour, then the psychologist had to leave, but he said he’d be back next week. The Soldier with PTSD thanked him, but he was still in the hole.
    A priest came by. The Soldier with PTSD called for help. The priest gave him a Bible and said, “I’ll say a prayer for you.” He got down on his knees and prayed for the Soldier with PTSD, then he left. The Soldier with PTSD was very grateful, he read the Bible, but he was still stuck in the hole.
    A recovering Soldier with PTSD happened to be passing by. The Soldier with PTSD cried out, “Hey, help me. I’m stuck in this hole!” Right away the recovering Soldier with PTSD jumped down in the hole with him. The Soldier with PTSD said, “What are you doing? Now we’re both stuck here!!” But the recovering Soldier with PTSD said, “Calm down. It’s okay. I’ve been here before. I know how to get out.
    ~Author Unknown
    Henryforward and Starman123 like this.
  6. grffn

    grffn Fapstronaut

    I've been there before. Also thought I was going insane. No one loved me and there must be something seriously wrong with me. I came close to ending myself about five years ago. I'm still here and grateful to be so. On paper my life hasn't improved a lot but my mind and perspective towards my life certainly has.
  7. Leerock

    Leerock Fapstronaut

    I was also there before
    Also had a serious kind of ocd
    Nobody could understand the hell i was going through
    Nofap helped a lot
    One thing is for sure
    The darkest the hell you find
    The brightest will be heaven when you get out
    Try gym and healthy diet
    Cold showers and wim hof breathing do wonders
    Henryforward likes this.
  8. Makingitthistime

    Makingitthistime Fapstronaut

    I don't know what to say
    All I'm trying to do now is to keep myself sane and not kill myself.
  9. quit@porn

    [email protected] Fapstronaut


    Try to speak with someone counselor etc..

    Or I would recommend write down everthing here on this forum. Someonw going to or have gone through that will say some way out . If not writing down itself will reduce the pressure..

    But, one thing is sure, everyone has role and each life counts... Whom so ever you are what ever be your situation. You do matter to us... So dont think about suicide. ...

    I can't tell much.... Just want to see you writing something here..... May you have long meaningful life with bliss. And peace in heart
    Cartographer likes this.
  10. Archangel01

    Archangel01 Fapstronaut

    Through whatever pain you're going right now, even if you think it will never get better, I assure you the sun will start to rise again, even for you.
    Look for some help, and someone you can talk to personally and tell him whatever is on your heart. There's nothing you have to be ashamed of.
    There must be at least one thing in your life, you care about. Think about that and try to give your life a sense through it.
  11. quit@porn

    [email protected] Fapstronaut

    Life if is not meaningless brothers, it's worth. Don't give uo for anything whatbso ever may be the reason...... You have not replied....
  12. quit@porn

    [email protected] Fapstronaut

  13. Hello,

    I’m sorry to hear that you are struggling. Rebooting has its ups and downs, just like life. We see many people experiencing both the ups and downs during the reboot, and though it may be hard to see now, these feelings you are having won’t last forever. It will get better with time, if you are patient and wait.

    In the meantime, please seek professional help. I know the idea of calling a helpline might terrify you, but in times of crisis, we often need someone their to put our lives in perspective. So please contact someone who can help and don’t hang up on them. The International Association for Suicide Prevention maintains a list of suicide prevention hotlines for countries all over the world. Also, if you don’t feel up to actually talking to someone on the phone, StopSuicide maintains a list of online instant messaging and chat suicide prevention resources.

    You are not alone in this. There are ways to treat depression. Please contact people that can help you. Being depressed often makes it feel like you don’t have any more options. But that is a lie. That is just the depression talking. These feelings you have won’t last forever. We are in this with you, and we will all be cheering for you to get through this!
    Leerock and Henryforward like this.
  14. Makingitthistime

    Makingitthistime Fapstronaut

    Thank you everyone. Can I talk to someone. Please message me I need help
  15. hey man, if you need someone to talk to, you're welcome to call me and I can connect you to my wife, she's great at talking to, myself, not so much. Message me and I can give you my phone number.
  16. Hope-This-Works

    Hope-This-Works Fapstronaut

    I've been there too brother. Just reach out to people and talk, it help's a lot. I've called to helpline in the past and it really helps to share the load which you are carrying. You are not alone with your depression and it's important to understand, that you are not alone. I'm sure there's people around who cares about you and if you don't find nobody to talk to, I'm able to help you out.

    Stay strong, keep yourself, time heals everything!
  17. (800)273-8255. Suicide Hotline. It will be difficult, but if you can find your inner strength to do it, you can!
  18. Queek The HeadTakker

    Queek The HeadTakker Fapstronaut

    Suicide is the ultimate defeat so have faith and dont quit
  19. Warwick

    Warwick Fapstronaut

    I live with ocd and am happy to talk anytime, if you want to message.
  20. ThomasTheCat

    ThomasTheCat Fapstronaut

    hey man, if you need to talk I am here. I have OCD as well and I learned some tricks to deal with this shit. If you wanna talk to someone, anytime, im all ears.

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