I'm seriously mental exhaustion

Before i got HOCD... It was like a year ago before it happened. My attraction to women started to fade, i also noticed the odd but i thought it was just probably my brain rewiring from the pmo addiction i used to suffer that haunting me until today...

I also started to develop weird attractions to the same gender not sexual, not in emotion just straight up anxiety attraction that it's just an urge me to become avoidance somehow.... I experienced gay thoughts like me being in dominate position with a guy who physically feminine that was related to my porn trap crossdresser addiction, when fantasize about transwoman no longer to get me hard but fetish shit does... It was fucked up i couldn't no longer fantasizing about women sexually somehow good news to me that i be able to communicate with women freely now.

But now i get extremely anxious and scared every single day that i might be gay, nearly 6 days per week fucking nightmare, i unable to concentrate, focus on my work etc...

I just understand about false attraction and also my fear of being gay is reduced but i still doubt of how, why is it happened?

I don't recall early at my age i have no sexual attraction towards same gender at all, just never... After i got into high school and porn addiction started to have due depression, verbal abuse parents... Find a way to escape was porn and masturbated, i watched all types of fetish shits, straight, gay, and the transwoman and trap hentai is the most addictive because it is novelty to me... Although having all of that i still was in love with girls and multiple girls i've been in love with. Just what the fuck is happening to me in my 20s? Just why cause i don't seem to understand because it already happened a year earlier before i knew it was a type of HOCD form of OCD disorder