I'm slowly giving up, help

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Yesman77, Jun 19, 2018.

  1. Yesman77

    Yesman77 Fapstronaut

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    Guys I just can't do this anymore. I'm sick of relapsing, sick of being depressed, sick of life. Why were we given this strong desire? Why does lust even exist if it makes us so unhappy? I HATE PORN. It is disgusting, vile, and destroys the mind and I hate the way I feel when I look at it. Then why the hell do I keep looking?

    Sorry I just needed to vent. I could really use some motivation because I'm losing all hope. My life is not where I want it right now. Is anyone out there who cares?
     
  2. Calebb18

    Calebb18 Fapstronaut

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    Hey man! I care! I can relate to the way you're feeling and I believe there is more to bettering yourself than just doing nofap. Have you tried replacing porn with healthier activities? Like maybe volunteering or working out?
     
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  3. LionHart

    LionHart Fapstronaut

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    the struggle is and indicator of how succesful our lives could be : if we're experiencing something difficult, it means that we're capable of getting over it. And if we discipline ourselves and just keep going... I have no idea how powerful we'd become.
    Just remind this every time you''ll think that this is a nonsense battle; it's important and it does have a sense...
     
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  4. Mister Fire

    Mister Fire Fapstronaut

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    "Why this ? Why that ? Like sucks ! Poor me !"
    Who said it will be fucking easy to break that addiction ? Stop acting like a child, man the fuck up and keep fighting until you win ! Good luck, I support you !
     
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  5. ngu

    ngu Fapstronaut

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    Actually, you can and you will, it's normal that you are struggling now, I don't think all of those guys who hit +90 days were not like you, they struggled and they win, you will do it, just keep trying keep improving yourself, your way of thinking, your activities, and you will do it. Just to be here and be mad about your addiction is a good step. Good luck!
     
  6. persevereuntildeath

    persevereuntildeath Fapstronaut

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    How can a young person stay on the path of purity? By living according to your word. I seek you with all my heart; do not let me stray from your commands. I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you. - Psalm 119:9-11

    The heart, being a compass set within man by God, reveals the intentions of the soul. If our mind is set on the flesh we will fulfill the desires of the flesh, but if focused on the spirit, life and peace will come naturally. In order to live according to the word of God it must be hidden in your heart e.g. verses enmeshed in your mind and biblical principles thoroughly internalized. Do this and live.
     
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  7. I totally relate! It's very frustrating. One thing I've been doing is to get out and just start meeting people, specifically trying to start conversations with women. I've spent decades just gawking at them in magazines and videos. I need to get out there and meet real woman and make friends with them. As I see them more as humans that deserve respect, it has been lessening my desire to run off to porn. Also minimizing my down time where I get bored is a big help.

    (I'm not perfect by any means, I still have the urges to look at porn, but they are lessening. I used to do it hours each day, every day. This year I've marked on my calendar just 18 days total that I've given in. In my case I've been going to professional counseling. If you can afford it, maybe it will be a big help for you).
     
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  8. Yesman77

    Yesman77 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the support everyone. I'm feeling a little better today. I think secrecy might be the problem? Nobody knows about my problem. I think I need to tell someone and it will help me out. Also Mister Fire thanks for helping me snap out of the victim mentality. That's not gonna change anything!
     
  9. The Stag

    The Stag Fapstronaut

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    I'm with you. I wish it was easier. I used to be able to go for long streaks but lately I hit 2, 3 days and relapse... it's scary how your self-control withers away over time and it gets harder to break the habit. But stay hopeful and try to catch a good "wind" and hopefully you'll get out of the rut.
     
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  10. Aldiri

    Aldiri New Fapstronaut

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    It will be a lot more difficult if you continue that path in the future, believe me. It is hard for us all.
     
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  11. kalin_BG

    kalin_BG Fapstronaut

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    Man I command you Don give up!!! Your history must be your motivation. Never back down. If you watch porn and do fap this is waranty for a bad life.

    I also want wife good emotions and thats why i stay away from porn. If i watch porn for a sec...done. Its over.
     
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  12. Der Drachenkönig

    Der Drachenkönig Fapstronaut

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    I understand how you feel but by all means do not give up and do not fall into the victim mentality, that'll only make the matter worse. The fight will be a tough one, but don't give up, you'll come out on top and show PMO you're stronger. I'm with you.
     
  13. Yesman77

    Yesman77 Fapstronaut

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    I'm doing better and am in a lot better place than I was a few days ago. I get what you mean about the whole victim mindset. What I struggle with sometimes is that when I start a longer streak I forget the how awful it feels to relapse and I almost lose the seriousness of it. I've been trying to come on this forum more so I can constantly keep the battle relevant in my life. Also, has anyone tried mindfulness meditation exercises? I met with a counselor for depression the other day and that helped me so much. It helped with intrusive thoughts and getting stuck in that temptation loop.
     
  14. Der Drachenkönig

    Der Drachenkönig Fapstronaut

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    Really glad to hear that. What you say about forgetting the consequences about relapsing, well that can happen during this process but you'll need to work on that. Have you identified your triggers? Have you given some serious thought about what the root of the PMO problem in your case could be? Regarding Mindfulness, i'm also going with a counselor for depression, and was also suggested to do that, gave it a shot and worked wonders. Aside from helping you with intrusive thoughts it helps you focus on the present, on the moment, so you'll also be learning to be less anxious about the future.
     

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