I'm stuck and desperate for change

Welcome
Please, start studying carefully what's happening in your mind > https://oceanrecoverycentre.com/2016/07/the-ultimate-guide-to-overcoming-internet-porn-addiction/

First time without porn will be stressful , but if you resist , in some months you will feel reborn.

If the first times a person relapse easly, it's okay.
The streaks becomes even longer , day by day.
Don't porn anymore, it's better to struggle and at the last to relapse than to look at porn.
No more instagram pictures of models. No more erotic imagines , erotic stories or erotic asmr.
If you experience ''flatline'' and low libido , resist.
> https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/por...l-size-and-or-libido-are-decreasing-flatline/

Spoiler: About Relapse Prevention

We should improve in all area of our life, just being dissatisfied or stressed makes us relapse.

An effective weapon to overcome urges and thoughts : mindfulness.
The brain will try to win you and to get some triggers for the seek of dopamine. Resist

 

When you say that PM holds you back from what you want in life, you are really onto something. Look at what you want out of life and what your values are. Focus on achieving what you set your mind to, and spend your energy on that. Stopping the PM is key, but if that is your only focus, you are 'white-knuckling' and will have trouble. Focus on what you do want, not just what you do not want. That is a good start. You have the right idea.

Keep coming onto NoFap.

Make a couple changes in your life; do not overwhelm yourself changing too much at once.

Good luck! There is a ton more great advice here; keep looking for it and you will find what you need.