I want to get help. I dont know what to do. Im young and I dont feel the urge and my penis just doesnt work. Facts: I dont know what caused this. I used to masturbate PRONE before that, I pulled my penis like that: PICTURE like that, i just masturbated this way with my one hand and most of the time I really choked my penis. BUT this probably was not the cause, because that time I started to take Olanzapine 5mg and some other SSRI which the name of I cant remember, I took maybe 13 pills of olanzapine and 7 of the other stuff, but no more than that, first thing first I didnt even wanted to start to take this shit, but I had to, because this all happened when I first tried cannabis OIL and I had some sort of panic attack I thought my heart will jump out of my chest it was pounding, so I called ambulance and I was fucking treated as schizophrenic just because I had a anxiety attack from THC. My anxiety attack cleared after 1 hour and they urged me to take these pills these fucking shitty SSRI, I stopped to take them as soon as I could. And since that happened I just could not feel the urge somehow. Because of me not being able to feel the urge, I tried to PRONE masturbate harder, I thought it will help if I push erected penis downwards and try to push harded to feel something. And then I just pushed it too hard and I could feel the orgasm was nothing, I probably stretched my penis ligament or damaged it, it snapped , because after that 0 feelings orgasm my penis was just dead. I could see that it was soft and I could not get hard by thinking, I could not get anything, I could not force erect it, nothing worked. It was also longer and hanging more than usual. Completely dead dick stretched ligament or something. I went to urologist the other day and he just told me there is nothing wrong and fuck off get a sex therapist, I hate him so much. Since that, I tried to fix it by myself, I tried to masturbate forcefully, it didnt work first 30 days. After 2 months I could get semi erection but it was weak, weak so weak, and not in any way erotic, it was just really boring, I was not horny. I managed to masturbate without the urge, I dont know why, but there is no urge at all, I can get little erection, when I touch it, but its not coming from my brain, its like my penis get erected but I dont feel the "good" when it gets erected, I just feel its filling with little blood, and I have to hold my breath very strong to keep it somehow erected. I tried to stretch my pelvic floor, Im trying Yoga now, breathing, , cold showers to penis, I can feel it is getting more warmer, but thats all, Im desperate. Final conclusion, I think I have nerve damage, I cant even feel the urge, I cant feel properly this part of penis mainly, even if I focus and want to get blood there, I just cant: PICTURE: this part is like dislocated from the prone masturbation injury And its 2 years since I had no sexual urge, NO penis erection by thinking, NO penis erection by watching any type of porn, NO morning erection, I just feel weak and I dont want to live anymore. Yes I still can make my penis erected, but I have to try hard, I have to touch it with my hand and its not just good, and the orgasm is pure SHIT, its like nothing, I ejaculate but its nothing. I feel like I have to repair the upper part of my penis shown on picture above, I think that isnt working, and that should be sensitive to touch and it isnt, I think that part is blocking my brain to get the erection impulses, spontaneous HORNY erection goodness Please can someone tell me what to do, what can I use to repair it, what to try, anything, I cant live like this, im just 23 years old. I tried NoFap for 2 weeks and I could continue forever, but I just wanted to try if it helped, and it didnt. I can nofap how many days I want because there is no brain urge to touch my penis or to masturbate or no horninness at all.