I tried very hard for this Nofap trip. Yes, it was only 10 days, but I did a lot of things to make this happen: I learned to sleep at night, not to skip school, I was again engaged in creativity (music) and many others. But my poisonous rodents ruined everything. My grandmother sucks from me all the good, energy. I again fell into low thoughts, lost energy, mood and time. And again plunged into the PMO. I hate it all. It’s so hard to go up and grab yourself anew, to do basic things and to fall so easily in the bottom and observe life as if from the bottom of a icy river. No friends and girls. I thought that I didn’t even have a month in my whole life so that my relatives would not bother me. I’m tired, I’m 20 and I’m still tormented by scandals, I don’t know what calm at home is, I’ve been nervous all my life, they don’t let me recover and leave to live alone. If I die and who cares? Somehow he lived, tried something, wanted something, dreamed about something, sought something (maybe not enough), even no one will know about it. I want to find a virgin girl. I’ll try to overcome all the difficulties and begin to get acquainted with the girls in the spring. Please write comments, I have no friends and I want to be heard.