Imagination in bed.

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Mountaingoat123, Jan 9, 2021.

  1. Mountaingoat123

    Mountaingoat123 Fapstronaut

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    So last year I meet an amazing girl online, she lives in another country so we haven't met yet, due to the covid. But we hope that we can meet this summer.

    Now I have a porn addiction, and I've had some problems with PIED, but I'm not sure how bad it is.

    Point is, I wanna do this journey now, so I can be the best I can be when I meet her, in every way.

    I'm now on day 10 and things have gone okay, I had some huge urges, but got past them.

    Last night me and this girl talked a lot after we were done playing with our group, and I felt this sexual tension with her, it was pretty strong, we talked about alot of stuff, but watching porn wasn't even in my mind at all, there was no urge there. After we went to bed, I fantasized a little about her, I never touched my penis or anything like that, I just held my pillow haha, sound weird saying this.

    Is this bad? I mean there was not a single urge in my body to watch porn, this was something way more intimit, and I didn't think about anything like fetishes, mostly just me holding her to be honest and kissing her.

    Personally I don't think it's gonna do me much harm, but just cause yesterday was no trigger at all, it might be different another time, but it also kinda felt that I had healed a little. All the weird shit I've been watching, it was not on my mind at all.
     
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  2. UnfairPhysics

    UnfairPhysics Fapstronaut

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    My friend, I will tell you from my experience. I used to fantasize in bed, at first it started like you said (no urge and you know just kissing and stuff) but on the next days it quickly escalated to the level that I was waking up in the morning feeling some huge urge. So yeah fantasizing costs me many relapses and I decided to just stop doing it. (keep in mind that I was thinking about girls just from my imagination).
     
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  3. Mountaingoat123

    Mountaingoat123 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks man, I try to limit it. But it's kinda hard when I talk to her before bedtime. I've told her everything about it though, even my PIED, but she still wants to meet me. So that's nice.

    Everything feels very different for me this time around though, I feel like I have more motivation cause I'm not only letting myself down, but I feel her too. One of the reasons I told her.
     
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  4. UnfairPhysics

    UnfairPhysics Fapstronaut

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    Good luck my friend.
     
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  5. blacklabel92

    blacklabel92 Fapstronaut

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    its good ur being honest and open with someone u like. especially if they recieve it well but just be careful not to give out too much personal info in the beginning stages. me personally i wouldnt have told her the pied thing until after you guys met and went on a few dates first. but different strokes. good luck buddy.
     
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  6. Mountaingoat123

    Mountaingoat123 Fapstronaut

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    Well, she doesn't believe my problem is PIED, but rather that last time when I had this issue, I was drunk, it was just a complete stranger that I really had no affection over or even that much attraction it all felt very staged, and to be honest I don't know for sure either, but I suspect it.

    Eitherway, this journey is gonna help me a lot, I'm certain.

    I also was at the doctor today, wanted to test some of my levels. Now this doctor said straight out that he didn't think my levels would be off and that it wasn't for 95% of the men at my age.

    He said it most likely was due to stress and that I have accociated it with images on the screen before. So at least we are on the same page me and my doctor, somewhat.

    He didn't say anything about NoFap, he just said I should abstain from P and he thought that would help.

    Nevertheless, I'm doing a full 180 days at least of no PMO at all, hardmode.
     
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  7. TheForsakeen

    TheForsakeen Fapstronaut

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    fantasizing about your girlfriend/wife isn't all that weird especially for new couples, its mostly harmful for singles and when done in excess.
     
  8. Navier

    Navier Fapstronaut

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    I'm having the same problem, these fantasies come all of a sudden and make it harder to fall asleep. Not sure how to avoid these thoughts in bed though
     

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