Improving verbal communication skills

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by Hadrian3, Oct 9, 2021.

  1. Hadrian3

    Hadrian3 Fapstronaut

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    I want to be a bit talkative but most of the times I can't think of much things to talk about. And if I have something to bring on, I can't speak properly. Especially if it's longer than a few sentences, I may struggle to continue properly. I am also socially awkward and don't feel very comfortable when talking to others. Like, I feel awkward when telling a joke to people. Unless maybe if they are old friends.

    I just wanted to know how can I improve my verbal communication skills and also ease the awkwardness I have in presence of the others. I searched for related books but most of them appears to focus on the non-verbal skills (not sure). If you know any good books please share it.
     
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  2. matt2k12

    matt2k12 Fapstronaut

    how are your reading habits?
    usually people who are illiterate arent able to speak fluently.
     
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  3. 88991s

    88991s Fapstronaut

    My grandma never went to school. But she can speak fluently in my native tongue. Her storytelling is very artistic .
    So How is being illiterate related to speaking fluently can you please elaborate ?
     
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  4. Hadrian3

    Hadrian3 Fapstronaut

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    I think I'm literate enough. Especially in my native language I'm excellent. A good translator from English (others said that).
     
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  5. Hadrian3

    Hadrian3 Fapstronaut

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    My father wasn't that literate, but he would talk very fluently. He would enjoy talking and the listener also would enjoy his stories. He could talk to you the entire day without pause.
     
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  6. 88991s

    88991s Fapstronaut

    I have the same issue. I think my social anxiety played a large contribution to it. And then my lack of communication skill enhanced my social anxiety.
     
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  7. Hadrian3

    Hadrian3 Fapstronaut

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    I think I'll take some classes on social skills. Even singing classes could help as you are forced to sing! :D But right now I'm at home for some time and I wish to find something useful to read. Some books maybe.

    Perhaps some jobs that require interacting with people can help also. Working in a hotel helped me to approach strangers, especially of the opposite sex easily. Like asking a question, address, etc.
     
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  8. E31

    E31 Fapstronaut

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    Well you already know how, so put the nikes on ;)

    Singing is really powerful and together with a job like you mentioned, imho the most effective method.
    What helps me is keeping in mind that other people can be boring too or anxious and really focusing on the person I'm talking to.
    Not like staring them down but mentally trying to get a peak into their world, asking questions that shed some light on how they perceive life or about what makes them happy and so on.
     
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  9. Hadrian3

    Hadrian3 Fapstronaut

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    I was wondering if there are other people on this website who have fixed this issue. Their story of success could be helpful for me. Also, looking for some good books on this matters.
     
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  10. Controller69

    Controller69 Fapstronaut

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    Well for me personally, I started talking to everyone with their specific domain( For example a Business man about his business, a Shop Keeper about his shop and employee, An engineer about his work, an athlete about his work-ethic... You get the story). You just gotta step up and choose a topic you know they are either interested in or have keen knowledge to share with you, this also makes it easier for you to open up and talk about your experiences with them as well.
     
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  11. Haladavar

    Haladavar Fapstronaut

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    I feel for you, Hadrian, as well. I have been someone who was completely mute, afraid to show people my voice, to a competent personality in public (still have a lot of work of course).

    Here are my tips for you:
    • You said it yourself that everyday or every week positions where you have to interact with people steadily improves your ability to communicate. Add 1 or 2 social activities that you do every week that will put you in front of people
    • When you're in group, be the first to initiate. I'm sure that you've felt the same when you wanted people to come up to you to start, but you have to be the one
    • Find the other person's passions and interests as quick as possible. Also find a shared interest. Avoid as much small-talk as possible
     
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  12. modern milarepa

    modern milarepa Fapstronaut

    try writing some imaginary dialogues between two people one of them being you. Being talkative is about being relaxed and usually say whatever pops up in your head. It is being a bit crazy or not so rational too because your are making free associations in your head on the spot.

    try also a creative writing course too if you want
     
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  13. {Ananta}

    {Ananta} Fapstronaut

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    My Journal
    :eek::Dbruh, you make me laugh, i find the most talkative ones are the idiots that have nothing but stupid ish to blabber,
     
  14. {Ananta}

    {Ananta} Fapstronaut

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    talkative , communitive are but female traits, its in our dna, the females stay in the villiage an blabber to each other while the males are quiet so that they dont scare away the prey they are hunting or enemies who may hear them ,im queit as hell ,it pisses people off but i find im most talkative wit the right females that come around me but are very few
     
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