In need of encouragement.

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Fallensoldier1, Nov 1, 2019.

  1. Alyx87

    Alyx87 Fapstronaut

    Please go and see a good therapist and commit to it for at least 6 months. You have done a lot of work, the streaks you reached are jaw dropping to me at least. I'm sorry to see that despite the enormous effort you have put into this, you are still struggling. Sometimes you can't do everything yourself and need help. Don't let the work you've already put in to go to waste, please!
     
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  2. Fallensoldier1

    Fallensoldier1 Fapstronaut

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    Thank you sir. Best of luck to
    You as well. I’m sorry to hear about your father and girl problems in the past. We all deserve to be treated fairly and loved. How does the htp work for you?? Along with the stress I have recently started taking my blood pressure and I’ve seen it go up and down and they worries me as well. I know if fluctuates a lot throughout the day also and I don’t know much about it yet as I am learning.
     
  3. Fallensoldier1

    Fallensoldier1 Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for your advice. Honestly a therapist isn’t really an option. There is no way I could afford it and I live in such a small town I’m not even sure I could find one specialized in any sort of sexual addiction or a good one in general to help with this sort of thing. It does sound good to have someone to talk to and help with stress and anxiety and self worth tho. But I just don’t think I could make that happen.
     
  4. Ronaldo Machuca

    Ronaldo Machuca Fapstronaut

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    Another person mistaken how nofap leads to being an alpha. Bro NoFap is a tool to use to help achieve your other goals. You yourself need to have goals before you even try NoFap. If you have no goals after going certain days no PMO. Then PMO was never your problem. idk why a lot of people do NoFap blindly thinking it really was a setback and problem when it never was.
     
  5. Ezpz

    Ezpz Fapstronaut

    i don't think you need a therapist. Your brain is extremely sensitive to stress, even though reason dictates you have no reason to stress.
     
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  6. Fallensoldier1

    Fallensoldier1 Fapstronaut

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    I’m not sure I understand your point sir. My goal is to not look up P or even M ever again. That’s my goal. I want it cut out, forever.
     
  7. Fallensoldier1

    Fallensoldier1 Fapstronaut

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    Very sensitive indeed!!! Some stress is fine. But I don’t want too much, too long, and end up with other health issues. I guess stress and anxiety is pretty new to me. So I’m not used to being able to handle it. Small things even loud noises, certain people, anything can stress me out right now.
     
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  8. Fenix Rising

    Fenix Rising Fapstronaut

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    I can relate, NoFap sucks at times. With that being said, I'd advice you take some steps to reduce your anxiety levels. I'll give you some practical suggestions that have worked for me, but you have to figure out what works for you.
    • Aerobic exercise -> I'd say this one is no 1 in my playbook. You don't have to do long sessions. Maybe start with 30 min walking/running outside 3-4 times a week and build up from there. 5 min of worm up, 30 minutes of running and 5 min of cool down is all what is needed to get most benefits out of it. Everyone has 40 minutes a day to spare no matter how busy he or she is.
    • WIM HOF breathing -> It will take you 10-15 minutes to complete and is very easy to master. This is usually coupled with taking cold showers, but it's not mandatory. Breathing alone works too.
    • Pranayama breathing -> Several researchers have reported that pranayama is beneficial in treating a range of stress related disorders. It's not hard to do and doesn't take a lot of time to do (10-20 min)
    • enough sleep -> Dalai Lama once said that sleep is the best form of meditation. Try to get 7-9 hours of uninterrupted night sleep preferably between 11pm and 2am if possible
    • work on your mindset -> I recommend you to adopt stoic way of thinking (CBT therapy is based on this classical philosophy). Maybe read Marcus Aurelius Meditations and Wayne Dyer's Tao te Ching interpretation. Changing your mindset is hard work, it won't just happen because you read some books, but it's worth the effort. You basically have to become watcher of your thoughts and emotions. Learn to observe and analyze them before you act. Ask yourself why do you feel anxious when anxiety strikes, if there is an objective answer to the question, try to address it, if not just try to let go of negative emotion, do one of the mentioned breathing technics, go for a run or just start doing something that requires all your mental focus. This way your brain won't have capacity to continue ruminating around negative emotions.
    I hope this can be of some help to you.
     
    Last edited: Nov 4, 2019
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  9. Fallensoldier1

    Fallensoldier1 Fapstronaut

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    Thank you sir. I know I need to do some cardio exercise in general. Not just for anxiety, but for health reasons as well. I will look into those breathing techniques, also I’m trying to work on meditation and in the background on YouTube I love having realizing scenes like beaches and woods with music playing.
     
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  10. Ezpz

    Ezpz Fapstronaut

    It was new to me when i began to quit PMO too. hang in there buddy
     
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  11. Fallensoldier1

    Fallensoldier1 Fapstronaut

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    Thank you and congrats on your 91 days!
     
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  12. Re411

    Re411 Fapstronaut

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    Do you have dogs? Maybe on the weekends at night when you said it gets extra tough, take them for a walk around the neighborhood. Or even if you don't have them just go for a walk. I think walks are good for the heart too, breath properly when you walk and just take in the night time landscape, hopefully there's trees and maybe stars around. Just tossing out some ideas. Hope you can work through this!
     
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  13. Firstly, never give up. Whatever the situation may be, never give up.

    For the past few years, I've been struggling with this addiction but its not going anywhere. There were times where I felt like this wasn't for me but after much contemplation, I knew I had to keep trying. Remember, insanity is doing the same thing over and over again but you expect different results.

    I relapsed yesterday but I immediately got back up. I have a tendency to justify a relapse based on a special number of the month (stupid, I know). And my goal is to give full commitment no matter the situation, the day of week. Read this, I didn't have any motivation, I thought to myself I'll start on the 20th of November, why? I don't know. But if I start today (yesterday), I'll be 16 days clean. How awesome is that? Anyways, this is my problem and I'm working on ridding this bad habit.

    Just like you, I feel that I've improved physically and knowledge wise however my state of mind makes me feel like I've regressed. No, I will not give into the urges. It just shows that I'm weak minded, to be strong, one must be in control and do what's necessary to avoid a relapse.

    When a child is first learning to walk and they fall over, do they say, "maybe this isn't for me"?

    Here are two quotes that I found and they resonate well with me.

    "If I quit now, I will soon be back to where I started. And when I started, I was desperately wishing to be
    where I am now."


    "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it's called the present." (Master Oogway)

    Never give up! All the best.
     
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  14. Fallensoldier1

    Fallensoldier1 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the encouragement guys. I reset last night. But it was more to some “soft core” stuff and didn’t spend hours looking stuff up. It was crazy how all of a sudden the last few hours of the night I just actually Got really horny and lonely. Me and the wife havent been intimate in a few weeks. I know it’s no excuse but that makes it harder for me when we aren’t intimate regularly. Relapses will still happen but the important thing is the next day to get back up and not fall again.
     
    Last edited: Nov 5, 2019
  15. D-Mystifier

    D-Mystifier Fapstronaut

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    Keep it up : ) Nutrition is a worthy pursuit in the realm of healing!
     
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