In trouble

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Chudmeister, Jul 16, 2019.

  1. Chudmeister

    Chudmeister Fapstronaut

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    So I got myself in trouble with my wife again, I looks at porn then lied about it until I fessed up. Now she's not talking to me at all and.i feel a huge sadness inside me, I'm not sure how to deal with being lonely.
     
    Yolk likes this.
  2. Yolk

    Yolk New Fapstronaut

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    Make friends. sounds like a daunting task? be nice to people and some of them will be nice back to you :)
     
  3. properWood

    properWood Fapstronaut

    Give her time. Then commit to seek to overcome this addiction, even if that means that you'll have to look up a therapist today or tomorrow and admit to the therapist that you need help. That's a sign of strength and if you do start trying to fix this issue on your own initiative and in the correct way, she'll support you. But your integrity has been compromised and her trust in you has collapsed; it will take time to regain that trust.

    But right now, at this moment, you probably have to suffer. Either go for a very long walk outside or spend time organising a room in the house; it helps with keeping you busy and sorting your thoughts.
     
    Chudmeister likes this.
  4. Chudmeister

    Chudmeister Fapstronaut

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    You're right its hard to keep busy sometimes but i need to try harder.
     
  5. youliveyoulearn

    youliveyoulearn Fapstronaut

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    Work towards mastering something, loneliness will go, the friends will come.
     
  6. Chudmeister

    Chudmeister Fapstronaut

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    I think thw theapist is a good idea, i feel like something is wrong with me.
     
  7. properWood

    properWood Fapstronaut

    I hope you didn't misunderstand me, I didn't mean to suggest that there is something wrong with you; on the contrary, I don't think there's anything wrong with your personality, your sense of self or anything related. As a matter of fact, we are all quite a bit fucked up in our own ways, and that's normal.

    However, a therapist can help a lot with understanding where self-sabotaging behaviours come from and then overcoming those behaviours. Doing it alone can be very arduous and demotivating journey. That's all :) Good luck!
     
  8. kropo82

    kropo82 Fapstronaut

    Some thoughts...

    Do you keep a journal? I ask because you relapsed and lied, both of which are bad, but they are also an opportunity to learn from what went wrong. A journal is somewhere to collect and reflect on all that.

    Why does your counter say 444 Days when you recently relapsed? I know there is debate here about the importance of day counting, but I found it useful.
     
  9. Chudmeister

    Chudmeister Fapstronaut

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    Ive never been able to figure out how to reset it
     
  10. kropo82

    kropo82 Fapstronaut

    I think you just go here and revise the date: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?pages/pmo-counter/

    And do you keep a journal?
     
  11. Chudmeister

    Chudmeister Fapstronaut

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    I don't keep a journal i tried it.once but I didnt write in it every day
     
  12. kropo82

    kropo82 Fapstronaut

    Me neither, but if you don't think of it as daily I think you would find it useful. It gives you somewhere to reflect, somewhere that is easy to read back through and for friends to comment (or challenge you if they think you are talking :emoji_ox:, I've had that happen to me and while it is annoying it is also useful!)
     
  13. Chudmeister

    Chudmeister Fapstronaut

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    I started a journal it helps me get some of my feelings out and thoughts I have out.
     

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