1. Welcome to NoFap! We have disabled new forum accounts from being registered for the time being. In the meantime, you can join our weekly accountability groups.
    Dismiss Notice

Insane Addiction to Cam Sites

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by nyc1981, Sep 1, 2017.

  1. nyc1981

    nyc1981 New Fapstronaut

    4
    11
    3
    Not sure where to start other than I have a huge addiction to Cam Sites, its not even like I just go on these sites daily but I tend to use them for hours and hours at a time. Today I was on cam sites and masturbated for almost 7 hours non-stop, I do this typically 3-5 times a week. I always tell myself it will be a "quick" session but time just seems to blur by and the next thing I know the day/ evening is gone. These sites have negatively affected both my personal and professional life but the urge is so strong that I just can't seem to stop.

    For starters I am a teacher (and no, I have never had urges to be with my students) a very demanding and time consuming job that requires a lot of prep time outside of school. However rather than preparing for the next day I am wasting countless hours on these sites. Needless to say my instruction and lessons have suffered greatly due to the wasted time and poor planning as I find myself trying to throw together a lesson last minute even some days rushing in early to try to put something together last minute for that day. Today I even went into school (we are still on summer break) to try and get some work done however the urge became so great that I rushed home to get on these sites without accomplishing much. I am starting to get extreme anxiety as the school year starts soon and I have an insurmountable amount of tasks ahead of me that I have neglected all summer. I tell myself during the session that work can wait but the minute I am done I am in extreme scramble mode frantically trying to get something together.

    These sites have also damaged my relationship with my wife as she has found credit card charges for these sites as well as inappropriate pictures that I have sent and received to these cam girls. I have definitely developed multiple "relationships" with various girls over time which she also knows about. Our house is constantly a mess as rather than clean up I am devoting all time to these sites. If my mom or another family member calls I will typically ignore multiple calls which she takes personally and rightfully so.

    Physically I definitely find myself eating and sleeping less again replacing these activities with time spent on cam sites.

    It doesn't help that me and my wife work pretty much opposite schedules and I have way too much time where I am home alone. I am also on Adderall and I think this must have some contributing factor to my addiction as I become even more hyper-focused while on it, except for the wrong things.

    I don't know what to do, the urges are so strong, I need to be on the computer for my job but always find myself deviating to these sites, sometimes just to check who's on. If I have some free time and I am not home I will even log on on my phone to do the same thing.

    I feel powerless towards this addiction, the euphoria is so great during these marathon sessions and nothing seems like it could match it...
     
  2. My addiction wasn't that bad, and isn't cured yet, but I'm at the point where porn doesn't interfere with my life anymore other than lowering my confidence every time I relapse. Joining nofap was the right decision. There's nothing that you can do except begin the battle against your addiction. It won't be easy, but you need to slay these dragons. If your resolution is strong enough you can go cold-turkey, if not, you'll beat it over time.

    Some tips you should consider incorporating:
    -Wearing a rubber band to remind yourself not to look at porn
    -It's better to MO than PMO
    -Take a cold shower when the urges hit
    -Cold showers every day strengthen your willpower
    -Install a porn blocker...k9 is very popular, and seems to do the trick for many people
    -Eat healthy. You don't want your brain running on junk food when it tries to decide whether to watch P or not.

    Good luck my friend.
     
  3. Runtilmylegsdropoff

    Runtilmylegsdropoff Fapstronaut

    1,522
    1,750
    143
    Beating off 7 hours non-stop!? Oh man, you're doing some serious damage to your reward system physiology.
     
    Toutanmemtan likes this.
  4. Got to Overcome

    Got to Overcome Fapstronaut

    273
    292
    63
    I never much got into cam sites, but I know exactly what you're talking about with the feelings of exhaustion and inadequacy at work due to staying up till 4 in the morning staring at porn.

    I can also relate to a deteriorating relationship with your wife, failing to get household tasks done and neglecting relationships with family members and friends due to an obsession with women on a screen.

    Hardboiled has some great advice. Installing filters definitely helps. Accountability software is also good. A lot of people advise against involving your spouse in your battle against PMO, but perhaps having reports of your internet usage sent to your wife would be of benefit.

    Cold showers are great. Exercise is good, particularly when goals are involved. You can keep it simple, like continually trying to break your rep records for exercises. Let's say you did 30 pushups today. Tomorrow, try to do 31 in a set. Continue until you stall out and then switch exercises (or at least variations; for example, switch from standard pushups to wide or narrow grip pushups).

    One thing that has helped me is a focus on goals. I want to succeed in my career. Can I be successful if I'm constantly watching porn? No. Therefore, I have to stop watching porn. I want to be more confident in public settings. Will I be confident in public settings if I've just finished a porn binge and am thinking about what I'm going to binge on when I get home? Certainly not. Therefore, I have to cut porn out of my life. It can also be helpful to write out a list of negative consequences which will result from continued porn use.

    Either way though, a lot of people have regained control of their lives, so I'm sure you can do it too. You've just got to commit to doing the things which will bring success.
     
  5. kordin

    kordin Fapstronaut

    13
    23
    3
    Do you think that maybe those camgirls replace your social life with your wife?

    Because thats what I thought why people go to camsites other then the good ol meat beating because there is a woman telling you that she likes you or finds you hot or something.
     
    open_your_eyes likes this.
  6. davidramapoman

    davidramapoman Fapstronaut

    8
    10
    3
    When I went to the doc and told them
    I thought I had a sex addiction, they put me on adderrall. Needless to say, it messed me more and I'm convinced it makes the addiction worse. I'd find myself having to PMO before the rush so I don't get distracted, then another binge after the crash since I felt like crap. Also I would hyperfocus on P and spend hours finding the best stuff.

    I quit PM, alcohol, and adderrall all at once. It was hard. I took weeks off of work to readjust.

    Now I've found that I can focus just fine with coffee and no adderrall. I told myself the productivity I used to get with pills was still my brain, and I can still tap in to that intelligence with practice. It's scary to think how many P addicts out there are getting prescribed this stuff without ADD.

    I guess I'm saying try to stop taking adderrall :)

    Good luck!
     
  7. Hopefulgirl

    Hopefulgirl Fapstronaut

    1,044
    1,995
    143
    What does your wife say about all of this? Seriously, if you want to stop you must install covenant eyes on your devices so yoyr wife can see what you do. This isn't fair to her at all.
     
    ConfusedWife and anewhope like this.
  8. vulture175

    vulture175 Fapstronaut

    cam porn is more dangerous than casual porn because it involves money. It can drain so much of your time and your energy and even your money :(
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  9. ragnaroku

    ragnaroku Fapstronaut

    31
    36
    18
    I'm not helping, but just wanted to say I feel ya. I, too, am a teacher and it has impacted the time spent working. The jobs I've had never paid for the time I spent grading, so I was like... hm, since I'm not getting paid, screw it. I'd rather do something where I can get some benefit from it than working for no benefit.

    I, too, spent a bunch of time and money on cam sites. It's hard to get away BECAUSE you spent money on them, and deleting your account, which probably has all your saved videos of privates, pictures, and sexy chat logs feels like throwing away all the time and money you spent. I'm not helping you because I'm in the same situation. I haven't deleted my account. I just started this thing. I've removed the bookmarks. I PLAN on not going back to the sites. But I can easily do so just by logging in. So I hope I find the strength not to.

    One major difference is that I didn't create any lasting relationships with the cam girls. The one I did has stopped camming (thus making her video even more valuable and harder to delete). So I have as much urge to go back to camming as general porn -- it's about the same as all porn to me. And I've recorded almost everything I've spent money on, even though it's totally against the rules to do so.

    But I know the feeling. I always set the list to see new girls first. It was always exciting to me to find someone new to camming. Often cheaper, too, as they don't know their worth and don't have the experience to set their prices yet.

    I really hope you get past it, though. Your family is the most important thing, and I'm sure logically you feel that way. You KNOW your wife is more important than porn. You KNOW your job is more important to porn. But that stupid thing between our legs just screws up our priorities. I hope you (and I) can find the strength to get past it and hopefully find the mental capacity to follow our logic and get past our stupid ass urges.
     
  10. HeavyTiny

    HeavyTiny Fapstronaut

    25
    36
    13
    I think of cam sites as the crack cocaine of P. They are BAD! more time consuming WAY more addictive and they cost money!

    For me, realising that my life - the time in my life - was being taken up by P was the motivation to try and stop. i'm maybe 10 days off right now. even that has been hard so far - but the realisation that I can spend time living not live in order to spend time M to P is a liberating one. Honestly. Like any other addict, my life was taken over. the hopes I had for myself were gone. I was alive to service the needs of my demon (the abstract way I think of that addictive voice). Feeling like a puppet to something else - an empty life is bad. So far, that has been my motivation to quit. I really relate to you about the cam sites as that is what got me stuck in a whole new stronger way. Uh. I'm only just starting out. it's really, really early days for me but i know coming on here and talking is helping! Best of luck!
     
  11. Andy Valen

    Andy Valen Fapstronaut

    36
    45
    18
    some things i would recomend
    - Block those damn sites, use something like k9 or stayfocused
    - Set your computer and cell phone background to a picture of your wife and write on top of it the reasons why this needs to change
    - Use your computer in a different room and if its ever possible to hand write something instead of typing do it
    - Try and get your work done as early during the day as you can and get out and do something later in the day (working out works for me)
    - If you have access to any of those girls on skype, social media etc. block them now or even uninstall the apps, they don't care about you, they want your money
    - check up on your family regularly, don't loose your connection with them and call them before they have to call you
    - Always remind yourself of the consequences of this problem whenever you get the urge to relapse and never tell yourself its too late

    Best of luck, I know you'll get through this
     
  12. ragnaroku

    ragnaroku Fapstronaut

    31
    36
    18
    Best thing in this thread.
     
  13. nyc1981

    nyc1981 New Fapstronaut

    4
    11
    3
    Just did a 7 hour session, I hate myself and obviously have zero willpower. pathetic...
     
  14. pranav02

    pranav02 Fapstronaut

    380
    314
    63
    K9 NOWW. Ask your wife to set the password as I don't think you can trust yourself. Practice meditation in the sun around 5:00 pm and in the early mornings if possible to clear your mind. I would suggest you get a gym membership and starting hitting it as soon as possible. Remember your wife may tolerate this now but she may not one day, your future lies in your own hands. These girls will end up earning money and they're not even interested in the number of lives that are ruined. She get what they want and what do you get? An addiction and misery. Do some self-reflection on your root causes of this problem and talk to your close ones IN DETAIL about your issues so that you feel relieved. Trust us and yourself, believe in God if youre religious and everything will work well
     
  15. nyc1981

    nyc1981 New Fapstronaut

    4
    11
    3
    Some days I have so much energy and I feel like I can really get out ahead of some of my work, I started working today and partially accomplished a few things. But then the energy just gets diverted into this shit, for fucks sake imagine how much I could have accomplished in those 7 hours...
     
  16. pranav02

    pranav02 Fapstronaut

    380
    314
    63
    Again, follow my tips, at least for two weeks. You'll see for yourself, meditation during times of temptations will help you divert and channel your energy for right readons.
     
  17. MerseyPhoenix

    MerseyPhoenix Fapstronaut

    Dude,
    I can totally relate here, as I have spent a lot of time on camsites, both professional and amateur. The problem with them is that it gives you a pretty realistic interaction with attractive women without having to leave your home. Also, there are so many available at any given time, you do not develop a sense that you might have to wait for the other person to be "in the mood", if one disappears you just find another. They have standards, but essentially they are in the business of providing pleasure so pretend to like you and all the other visitors. It's a mild form of prostitution, I guess. Most of the time, the camgirls cannot see the guys so it is definitely nothing mutual. It is voyeuristic. We are there to watch them M. I am only at an early stage, but would like to keep in touch for when I start to think about them during my detox.
     
    Hardboiled24 likes this.
  18. Dareg

    Dareg Guest

    I can identify with your problem. I got hooked on chaturbate then discovered dirty roulette. It just hooked me, the opportunity to interact with a real person is so compelling and the exhibitionist nature of it. Anyway I began to realise
    I was truly addicted to it after kidding myself for a long time that I could take it or leave it, or just use it occasionally and all would be fine. It wasn't as the act is so corrosive in so many ways.. Anyway this time I hope I'm kicking it for good. Certainly the pain of withdrawal, I literally ache all over and feel so ill
    I don't want to put myself through this again!
     
    Deleted Account and noonoon like this.
  19. kropo82

    kropo82 Fapstronaut

    But you can learn from that and move on. What triggered you this time? What avoidance techniques were you trying and why did they fail? Are there techniques you haven't tried yet that might work. Get experimental and keep a journal. There are loads of men and some women here who have advice about that worked and failed for them. Keep trying.
     
    RobbyGo36, pranav02 and MerseyPhoenix like this.
  20. BetterManHopeful

    BetterManHopeful Fapstronaut

    161
    119
    43
    I know exactly how you feel. I used to spend a lot of time on those cam sites, but my problem more recently was Omegle. I'd waste an entire day at the office sometimes on there, sometimes multiple days a week. Then I'd even go home and stay up late on there, so the next day even though I wasn't on Omegle my day was still shot because I was so tired. My career is definitely suffering because of this. Luckily I was able to keep all this from my wife, so atleast she hasn't been directly affected by it. I'm on Day #28 of not going to Omegle or compulsively looking at porn, and this is the definitely the longest I've been able to keep myself clean since I realized I really had a problem probably 6 years ago. I don't know any magic cures, but here's some tips that have worked for me:

    1) Identify your triggers. Just about every day started with me saying that I wasn't going to go on Omegle that day. Then at some point I'd go over to Twitter, start searching for various images, and before I knew it I was turned on and started thinking "let me just go see if I can find anybody interesting to talk to"... ofcourse it's never ever as simple as that and I would go down the hole of wasting hours and hours and hours. Part of my recent success has been staying away from any of those sites that were triggers to me, and making posting on here every morning part of my routine.
    2) Identify other behaviors/situations that are triggering. For me it was being hungover and tired. If I was a little bit hungover it was almost a sure thing I'd end up going on Omegle that day. So I cut my weekday drinking down dramatically, which was probably a good idea anyway.
    3) Be prepared for times by yourself. If I was home alone for the weekend, or my wife went to bed early and I was up myself with nothing to do, those were times I would go get on Omegle. So now I go to bed with my wife most nights, even if its early, unless I actually have something I want to stay up and do, like watch a new TV show. On the weekends if I have time to myself I make plans, or just get out of the house, so I don't have the temptation.
    4) You already know this but you have to ingrain it in your head at some point - if you don't stop then this is going to ruin your life. Eventually your work performance is going to suffer enough that you'll lose your job. Or you'll get caught doing it at work, which is even worse. Your wife is going to get sick enough of it at some point that she'll reach her breaking point and leave you. Think about how socially destructive it will be for you when everybody finds out that you lost your career and your family to porn. I don't say this to be an asshole. I'm in the same boat. And the constant reminder of all of this coupled with the little bit of success that I've had recently have been enough to keep me on the right track for almost a month now.
    5) When you make the commitment to quit, start small. For me it was one day at a time. Then when I made it a week I tried to go two weeks. Then three weeks, etc. Today is Day #28 and I feel like I've really developed some good new habits and I'm feeling very optimistic about the progress I've made so far.

    Good luck man. I identify with so much of what you wrote here, so I'm rooting for both of us.
     
    Deleted Account and Jameson29 like this.

Share This Page