Insane Addiction to Cam Sites

Hey man, I am new to this site and was hoping to find other people who have cam site addictions. It is like the crack cocaine of porn. I have been addicted to porn for about 18 years, and I first started using the freeonescams site a couple years ago. It has thrown my porn addiction into levels beyond what I could have imagined. I could probably spend an entire day on it unless I force myself to stop. The urge like you said is severe. Aside from wasting so much of money I have also just gotten into really weird fetishes because of it, at first just watching a girl masturbate was enough but eventually that isn't enough. I am a teacher also, and am currently in grad school. I go into work or class feeling like shit and exhausted, because I was up all hours of the night beating off to cam girls. I know that it's something I need to kick NOW or I will totally ruin the good things I still have going for me. I wish you the best, I know we can beat this. It's good to hear from others who are in the same boat.

 

I know the feeling.

I am one of those people too.

I think the thing about cam girls for me is it present the allusion of connection. You can get chatting to these girls, you make them laugh, you can get to know them and it appears you're making some sort of connection. That's why I've spent so much money on them. With porn you're just watching but with cam girls you're doing more than watching. Also with some these girls are just normal girls in their bedroom, as far as I know there's no fake stuff you see in porn. It's the closes thing to the real thing without it being the real thing.

So true. One time on the site I lost my damn mind and spent all my money on this one cam girl - I mean literally I had nothing in the bank because I had spent it all on her and I had to ask my Dad for some money. I'm still trying to get out of the financial hole I've digged myself into.

This week I've been listening to Natasha Bedingfield's song Pirate Bones. From what I can tell the song is about materialism but I think it can be applied to the use of cam girls.
In the song she says:
It's not worth having
If it's too much to hold
You can dig so deep
That you're left with a hole
Thirsty in a desert with a bag full of gold
Don't wanna end up like pirate bones
What I thought was precious was just a pile o' stones
I might have the treasure but I'd be lying alone
Just a pile of pirate bones
If I forfeit my soul it ain't worth having
If it's something I stole it ain't worth having

It's not wroth that much to me
If losing out is what it means
To swim in shallow victory
Is empty, empty
It's just not worth the price
It's only a fools paradise
If it's draining every drop of life 'til I'm dry like pirate bones

I see @nyc1981 that you're married and some good questions for those of us who are in a relationship to ask is: what would happen if your SO found out? Is a cam girl worth the pain you'd probably inflict on your SO and yourself when the truth comes out?
One part of the song lyric stands out to me is: What I thought was precious was just a pile o' stones I might have the treasure but I'd be lying alone. Some of these cam girls may look beautiful, but really they're just a pile o' stones. While you may have had a good time with her you're left alone after. Maybe you'll be lying in bed with your SO but spiritually and psychologically you're alone. It will never change, no amount of PMO will stop you from lying alone after.

Myself I'm single but have made a vow to myself to not get into a relationship until I'm rebooted. I've read countless painful stories (on this forum) of how PMO addiction affects SO and I don't want to put a woman through that. The questions I have to ask myself is am I going be spending my whole life and a PMO addict or am I going to quit? What do I want more a connection to an actual real woman or a false connection to a cam girl?

Because really, at the end of the day cam girls and porn is only a fools paradise.

The key, I think for breaking free is developing self-control and self-discipline.

Self-control - Not acting on your desires.
Self-discipline - Doing things you don't want to do.

The trouble is in the western world we've become lovers of comfort and feeling good. We have products and attitudes that encourage us to have no control and no discipline. We need to get to a place where we're ok with being in pain from time to time. Not saying we should inflict pain on ourselves on purpose but when pain comes upon us we shouldn't run from it.

It's not easy going from having no discipline or control to actually having it. I'm not completely there yet, but I'm trying to develop it every day into my life.

Here's a great video of how to develop self-discipline into your life.

 

Im addicted to cam sites too. Its a powerful one, because of the connection.

I relapsed after about 2 weeks but have been sticking to it for 3 weeks now.

Its tough but not impossible. The way I get through it? Camgirls dont give a shit about you. They want your cash. You deserve a relationship.

 

If you want to, I'm up for doing a whatsapp group for this.

 

I'm down for that. Keeping in touch regularly with people fighting the same addiction can be nothing but helpful. It's tough on your own.

 

You are so right. And that's a big part of the addiction, falsely believing cam girls care about you or find you attractive, etc. They just want you to click that button and take them pvt. or excl. I remember when I first got on a cam site, I was like "I'm just gonna do free chat, no way I'd actually spend money on this shit." Now here I am, 3 years and a few thousand dollars later.

 

Just PM me your no. Il create a whatsap group and we can help eachother.

 

I have just pmd you my number.

 

How do you pdm someone on this site? Sorry I'm new.

 

Look into a 12 step program in your area. Sexaholics anonymous (SA) is a great one. It'll help tremendously. Also, keep in mind you're not addicted to "cam sites" you're addicted to the dopamine hit they provide - or we might say you're simply addicted to lust.

 

just want to say i totally relate to getting into cam sites -- it's something i'd never done, in fact, till I tried to quit PM early in the year and then suddenly this desire came up to go to cam. suddenly, i was spending money & i'd never spent money on P before. I'm trying to go cold turkey here and deleted my accounts etc. and i have vowed that next time I get the urge i'm going to take a look at my bank account. and if that doesn't kill the urge to waste money -- I'm going to take whatever i would spend and put it towards a nice vacation or a good dinner with someone I care about. I think in this one year I've spent enough on cam to have paid for a week long holiday for me and a loved one! I don't know if this will work for you but I'll keep you posted if it does for me ... IC

 

This is great man -- you are totally going to do it.

Good video -- thanks for sharing. Don't know if this will help but there's a lot of good advice & thoughts about discipline happening over here:

https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.p...ithout-porn-and-tv.136128/page-3#post-1097987

 

Bro. Your honesty has inspired me. I'm on this cam site cummerbond like 2-3 hours a day. I've spent thousands. I hit rock bottom. I need to change. I need to be strong. We can do it. Believe in God and have strength. Good luck brothers.

 

Don't talk about yourself like that bro..

 

Why do women sign up to cam sites? @chrysalids

 

She won't answer you since she's been banned. But I've listened and read interviews with cam girls and the main answer is for easy money and others say because it's fun.

 

Women go to cam sites the same reason you do, the dopamine hit. Women are probably more likely to go to a site that has men, women and couple participating, but that's a generalization. When I've gone on it's to see what's out there right? What are people doing? What will I see? A snapshot into someone else's life is a powerful drug in it of itself.

 

Another, I think most women go to watch women - purely for curiously. Either curiosity as to what the women are doing, or curiosity about their sexuality. They see cam as a "harmless" way of trying things out with another girl - and again, many women become addicted this way.

So don't think guys are the ones caught out by cam sites

But yes, cam sites are the DEVIL. I have had my own problems with them & they are the hardest things to break away from... It is easier said than done, but they is self-discipline & cutting out the SMALL triggers. I cannot stress cutting out small triggers enough, that has been the biggest thing that has helped me. All for too long I was focusing on cutting out porn, cutting out cam sites etc... Then I decided to cut out social media, and I found that must have been the root cause of what was bringing me to porn because now after doing that I've been porn free for 13 days.

 

@antipornguy i think that guys want to believe that women go on to see other women, it's kind of the pillow fight syndrome. @oversexedsami i know your not on much and super busy, but could you weigh in as you might have the ear of more women who do chat sites? I am guessing, like me, they go to be turned on, whatever that looks like, and that can change over time.
And I totally agree social media can be a really hard place to be when you are in recovery from PMO addiction. My husband just hit 2 years clean over this past weekend, chatrooms in particular had him by the throat, marathon sessions, edging, guilt, mainly a monumental amount of time wasted. He is so strong and healthy now, not being able to control it made him feel weak and ineffectual, combined with the intense number of hours sitting on the couch with a computer in him lap, it was hell for him, and it weakened his body and his mind. I don't need to tell you but, PMO addiction is like traumatizing yourself, in his case for years, it's a hard thing to come back from.

 

I wonder how the original poster is doing. I've had several addictions. First it was just porn. Then I started to chat on various websites. Well I've kicked the websites & have slowly cut back on porn. Cams have become my new problem. The brief connection you have with the models is such a high. I want to quit that too.