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Introduction

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by dtdrpepperguy, Mar 6, 2019.

  1. dtdrpepperguy

    dtdrpepperguy New Fapstronaut

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    Hi everyone, my name is Conrad and I'm 22 years old. I was born in Grand Rapids, MN, moved to Williston, ND when I was 10, lived there until I was 18 and now live happily in Grand Forks, ND. I moved here for college, which I failed at utterly, not because of a lack of ability, but because of a lack of desire after I started. I figured out pretty quickly that college wasn't for me and I was no longer interested in what I came to college for, so I quit attending all my classes and just pretty much kept to myself for the remaining time I spend there. I met my current girlfriend of nearly 3 years during college and have been living with her now for just about 2 years.

    I've been struggling with a porn addiction for most of my life, and it started at an unusually young age. I found myself having sexual urges as young as age 6-7 (mostly just wanting to see women naked and touch their breasts, not so much the actual desire to have sex that typically comes with puberty). I discovered internet porn around that age as well. I don't totally remember how I discovered it, but I did. It wasn't as easy then to access as it is now, being that we had slow dial up internet in my house for a long time during my childhood, so it didnt have as much control over me as it does now. But ever since that first time I searched for naked women online, it's dominated my life.

    I won't go over my entire young and teenage life and describe the effects that porn has had on me over a lifetime, but in a nutshell (and some of these things i'm about to mention may have other factors causing them, but I believe porn is the leading cause, or at least a major cause for them) has led to me now at age 22 have erectile dysfunction during sex with my girlfriend, low sex drive, regular fatigue, social awkwardness, it has seriously damaged my idea and and understanding of intimacy, insecurity in bed, lack of confidence in everyday life, and even obesity. There are more, but this is getting fairly long at this point. One thing that actually kind of frightened myself as I sat and had a period of self analysis was that, as I became more and more dependent on porn as I aged, I started to suffer from anhedonia from the constant porn use, and as regular porn started to not satisfy me anymore, it drove me to darker and darker porn, even to the point of watching incest porn.

    I discovered this website after watching a video series on youtube, and the creator of that series mentioned this site as a helpful tool for breaking my addiction to porn and getting my life going back in the direction I want it to. I really don't like where I'm at in my life and I'd like to make a serious change, and the porn addiction is easily the biggest most damaging negative thing i suffer with.

    Sorry if this is a little long or too much information for an introduction, but keeping it a personal secret and not being able to share the difficulty with anyone is pretty torturous, so I didn't want to skip on the details.

    Thanks for reading and I look forward to breaking this crippling addiction.
     
    odd_printout likes this.
  2. hey bro reading your story, u sound like me at 22, I'm now 36 and this addiction still around, I have made many mistakes due to pmo, I also feel like I lost plenty of opportunities, I'm glad to hear you found NoFap at such a young age, damn back in my day there was no help and nobody to talk to about my addiction to pmo, is tough trying to beat this addiction alone, I hope u stick around and read other people's stories, they will sound very similar to yours, just don't give up, hope to u see u around, good luck on your journey
     
  3. Sober34 great of you to reply to the youngsters. I'm 22 too, looking for sexual transmutation by retention of sex in general. The point with darker and darker blew my mind. Push harder to the brighter sight. Be proud of yourself. I'm here, standing , got up early. Seeing the sober34 29 and saying to myself. That is something you should be proud of . Everyday counts. Pepper guy do not overwhelm yourself. Be happy and proud about every little success in this journey. Never have ED but once I got anxiety too. I can feel your rage . It is awful at our age. That is the truth. But is curable and you can heal yourself.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  4. odd_printout

    odd_printout Fapstronaut

    It's not too long at all. Incest ain't the worst either. I wish you good luck on your journey!
     
    Leader of ME likes this.

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