Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by drwedge, May 1, 2019.

  1. drwedge

    drwedge Fapstronaut

    Hi all -

    Ironically I stumbled upon the NoFap subreddit searching for eye candy. I'm glad I've come up on this, and it couldn't have come at a better time. I'm 42 and was exposed to pornography at about 8 or 9 and have been struggling with it since then. As you're well aware (or could easily imagine), there is a significant amount of guilt and shame that I carry around. In addition, I became a Christian at 16 and expected the problem to just go away, but it didn't. Similarly, when I got married I figured that marriage would be the fix, but nope. So here I am - I have a great family and am tired of hiding in the shadows. I've often thought about trying to answer any questions my kids might have about pornography, but there is no way that I could honestly answer them unless it involves explaining how corrosive it is. Anyway, to add to the mix; I also carry the guilt and shame that come from being in the church and feeling the dichotomy of what I believe to be truth and what my human nature longs for.

    I'm tired of carrying this burden and could really benefit from the support system that I don't feel that I have IRL and am glad to have stumbled upon this forum. Just putting this into writing where I can make myself accountable is in itself a big step and immediately makes me feel hopeful for the healing to come. :)
  2. Welcome to the community.
  3. Florida Freedom

    Florida Freedom Fapstronaut

    I am about your age and my story and feelings are very similar. The secret life I was living was just too much torment knowing what God has done for me. I hate being a different person in private than at church...…………...I have heard that so many Christian men live as sexual atheists………..they let God touch every other area of thier lives except the sexual one...………(We live that part of our lives like we dont even believe there is a God) I know there is victory for you and me and everyone on this forum. I will not stop until I find it for myself. I know we serve a God of restoration, he loves restoring broken things to thier original state...………..I can only hope does for me
    drwedge likes this.
  4. MuscularSherlockHolmes

    MuscularSherlockHolmes Fapstronaut

    Hello and welcome to the community. :)

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