Is it a bad idea to be friends with a girl even after she rejects you?

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by zxcv, Apr 1, 2020.

  1. zxcv

    zxcv Fapstronaut

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    Tried asking a girl on a virtual date. Virtual because of the quarantine. Turns out she has a boyfriend. Would it be a bad to continue to talk to her as friends? Or would that be a beta/cuck thing to do?
     
  2. daddy_racc

    daddy_racc New Fapstronaut

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    Don't be a ***, broski... i think you need to move on and respect him as her boyfriend. there is a very old belief that boys and girls can't be friends one of them is attracted to the other in all situations. this could potentially bring a breach of trust within her relationship
     
  3. BruceD

    BruceD Fapstronaut
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    I would move on. To relate, when I was younger I fell into the friend zone hoping they would need me in a time of crisis. Have some dignity and self worth.
     
  4. Whether in this context or in your everyday life, I advise you to listen to your heart and not to the advice of others. Focus on what you really want, not on the best option to take. Because there is simply no answer.

    I am in a personal development process in which I approach girls in my everyday life (on the street, in shops etc). All I can tell you is that my biggest regret after 2 years of practice is to have moved on too quickly with some girls. Simply because they told me they had a boyfriend. We got along really well, though. I gave up on relationships, even as friends. Just because I couldn't sleep with those girls. The truth is, who cares?

    I think that every relationship, no matter what it is, can bring you and the other person a lot more. Don't put your desire to have sex or love too much in the forefront and don't make your choices based on that desire. You're better than that. That's all I can tell you. Good luck to you.
     
    Scorcher2000 likes this.
  5. What are your intentions ? Do you genuinely want a friendship or is there something else you plan on doing that goes way further than a genuine friendship ? If you do, i suggest you to drop the girl and don't be an orbiter. Plenty of single girls out there, don't do that to yourself.
     
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  6. zxcv

    zxcv Fapstronaut

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    Why does everyone think I'm trying to steal her away from her boyfriend? I'm talking just being friends. Maybe she knows another single girl or something.
     
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  7. p1n1983

    p1n1983 Fapstronaut

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    Because of this...
    And this...
    You want more than friendship. She can´t give you that for the moment, settle for beeing just her friend is a beta move.
    Simply tell her that you don´t want to be just her friend and call you if things ends with her boyfriend. If she is interested, she will call you then. Don´t stay hang up on someone that isn´t free.

    How can you spend time with someone you want romance with but she didn´t??? it´s torture... moreover if her boyfriend is around kissing, touching and doing everything you wanto to do to her.
    if you want her stand up for what you want and stick to your guns. Maybe when he broke up with his boyfriend she call u. But if you voluntarily put yourself in friendzone she will never respect you and never be more than friends with you.
     
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  8. Si you don't believe in friendship. The truth is i don't Care if her boyfriend is kissing her. I like meeting ppl that's all and i'm totally okay with my sexuality. I don't need anything and when i'm attracted to a girl ans she tells me i have a boyfriend, i don't ignore because if i do it it means that i'm frustrated. And to be honest i don't care.
     
  9. Take it from someone who's been in this situation so many times – this really depends on you.

    If you genuinely want to be her friend and only her friend it can be done. If you want to be her friend because you think you might one day sleep with her it won't work.

    I spent the first two months of this year trying to be friends with someone I was dating over christmas but I ultimately couldn't handle the rejection and the jealousy when she hooked up with other guys. One day I hope to be able to get over these things more easily. (I realise this isn't exactly the same situation though).

    Also in my opinion the concept of the friendzone is sexist bullshit. Guys who claim they're in the friendzone are just guys who a particular girl never wanted to have sex with and they're taking a confused approach about justifying that fact.
     
  10. p1n1983

    p1n1983 Fapstronaut

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    I do belive in friendship and I do have females in my life that are just friends. That´s because i don´t want anything more than friendship with them.

    i´m no talking about ignoring the woman you like, just don´t act like friendship is ok to you. If she ask to be friends with you just tell her that you want something more and to contact you when she is free.
     
  11. p1n1983

    p1n1983 Fapstronaut

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    This is exactly why you don´t try to be friends with someone you like.
     
  12. This is true, I think some people are capable of switching it up and genuinely being happy just being friends with someone they once has feelings for. Not me though, maybe one day
     
  13. PIEDSufferer

    PIEDSufferer Fapstronaut

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    Honestly, in my personal opinion, there is nothing more “beta” than running away from a girl just because she has a boyfriend. But here’s where you should tread lightly. You’ll need to understand your personal desires, as others have said. If you’ve placed this girl on a pedestal, and you’re just remaining friends with her in hopes that she’ll come around, you’re probably wasting your time. But if you can actually remain just friends with her, then why not? Allow yourself the freedom to still be attracted to her, while also searching for others. But it’s important to continuously stay on the “market” and connect with others. Because eventually, you’ll succeed. Whether it’s with her (if she happens to become single and is interested) or someone else. Just keep those options open. In fact, if she happens to become single down the line, and she sees that you didn’t run off just because she was in a relationship at the time you asked her, it could actually work in your favor. It could show that you’re not the type who was “just interested in one thing.” But the key is to not bank on that. It doesn’t sound like you are, so that’s good.
     
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  14. p1n1983

    p1n1983 Fapstronaut

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    Again, no one is running. Just not settling for less than what we want.

    No, no, and NO. This is where you are wrong. You are settling for less than what you want. That's beta behaviour and she can notice it rigth away.

    True!

    And here is where you show your real intentions. You don´t just want to be friends because you want her as a friend, you want something more so you keep yourself in friendzone in hope that when she end her relationship she didn´t forget about you so you can start dating her. That's approval seeking behaviour, that´s how beta mentality thinks attraction works and it´s far from actually working. that´s how movies tell you to act, but in reallity that never works.

    What works is that when she tells you she has a boyfriend you say to her that you want something more with her than just been friends so she is free to call you when things don´t work out with him. If she is interested in you, the day she ends his relationship she will contact you. if not she wont! easy as that. But is a fact that she will not cantact the guy who vouluntarily put himself into friendzone, because he is just weak and don´t stand up for what he wants and settle for less.
     
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  15. MrYang29

    MrYang29 Fapstronaut

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    it just not worth your time brah. just move on to another chick.
     
  16. JasonMamoa

    JasonMamoa Fapstronaut

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    I don't think you can be just friends with opposite gender. Attraction is bound to happen. A couple of months of back I proposed a girl I liked. Before this we used to talk day and night. She rejected the proposal. I respected her decision. We now talk sometimes. I realized I have to move on. And now I am focusing on other things. So the bottom line is move on brother.
     
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  17. DeProfundis

    DeProfundis Fapstronaut

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  18. PIEDSufferer

    PIEDSufferer Fapstronaut

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    There’s a big difference between actually being friends with someone, and feeling like you’re “friendzoned.” I believe that the mark of a truly confident male is having the ability to be an actual friend with an attractive female without letting the inability to fuck her take any toll on your confidence. I think it’s beta behavior to even worry about being friendzoned.
     
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  19. Kligor

    Kligor Fapstronaut

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    I think it is bad idea,that's what i think.
    Move on buddy,save your time it is not worth it.Being friends and being friendzoned is not same.Anyway when times come time that "friendship" will come to end,because everything come to end,i want to say get out when you still can.
     
  20. p1n1983

    p1n1983 Fapstronaut

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    The definition of friendzone is exactly that, is to be just friends with a girl that you want for something more.

    She can friendzone you by asking to be just friends to keep you on the hook as her backup plan or just to not hurt your feelings with a direct rejection.
    Worst case scenario is yours, when you purposely put yourself in friendzone hoping she will give you a chance in the future.

    No matter the case, both positions are weak for the man. Only a beta male will put himself in that spot.
    Hey! it's your life, enjoy been in friendzone!
     
    Kligor likes this.

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