Is it More Difficult to Keep NoFap While in an Intimate Relationship?

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by FeatheredTalo, Jul 10, 2018.

  1. FeatheredTalo

    FeatheredTalo Fapstronaut

    Greetings fellow Fapstronauts.

    I've come into a plateau in my journey. While I conquered my 90 days and beyond, I have come to the interesting situation where I am back with my SO and becoming intimate again. Part of my own problem with using porn was a reduced self-respect and lack of confidence in bed; part of the problem was not feeling adequate being with my SO; part of the problem was porn had been a huge aspect of my life. My SO is aware of my situation (part of the reason I'm doing this), but it's difficult for her to be receptive to my difficulties. I'm proud of the fact I've reached a point where I'm comfortable, but I'm also quite scared to fall.

    As some of you are aware, having an orgasm is a stimulant to wanting to have more.

    I have been much more intimate with my SO, up to the point where I am looking into things to be a much better partner.

    While I'm still trying to understand why, it's also gotten close to me looking for excuses to PM. I'm wondering if this occurs often when in the middle of relationship for fellow Fapstronauts.

    TL;DR: Partnered people: What do you do to help keep your intimacy up, but still keep the NoFap streak alive?
     
  2. GoodFeeling

    GoodFeeling Fapstronaut

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    I am yet to face this situation. We haven't seen this summer after I started my NoFap. I came to realise my addiction when I left her town and first thing I did home was PMO like 3 times. That was a wakeup call. Our sex was never pleasurable because I was not confident enough (I have DE) and that had an effect on both of us. We will meet soon again, after 24 days of NoFap (reset at day 10).
     
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  3. Tin Foil Hat

    Tin Foil Hat Fapstronaut

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    If you are feeling inadequate with your partner, whether that be because of pleasing her, ED, PE or size there are things you can do.

    Learn to please her take the time to talk about what she likes, doesn't like etc. and be willing to learn. Just let go of the ego we all have.
    Experiment with different things like toys for example if she is comfortable with it (but don't become too reliant)

    For ED and if you want to possibly increase the size of your ** jelqing exercises for men can be useful. (see if it's right for you)
    I found jelqing hugely positive for my own self confidence and it did work for me but did take a while and you need to be consistent. Do some research to see if its right for you.

    PE can be improved using kegel exercises which concentrate on gaining control over the pelvic floor muscle (google kegels for men and do some research)
    Also training yourself not to orgasm quickly if you are intimate. Slow down during sex if you are getting close, control your breathing and again learn to control that pelvic floor.

    In my late teens i spent along time addicted to P and had plenty of problems but doing these things really helped me, although i have slipped up recently i had no problems for many years because of the above.

    My first time replying to a post and im not sure if any of this is applicable to you but on the off chance it helps in some way i wrote it.

    Good luck to you in the future
     
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