Is it possible to reboot in a different way but it just takes longer?

If you want to enjoy a healthy NATURAL sex life you should try to eliminate this UNnatural habit completely. Thats the bottom line.

 

Someone who occasionally does this can still have a good sex life.

But.

Ask yourself, if they're having a good sex life, why in hell are they PMOing? It really doesn't make sense, does it?

The thing about PMO is that it gradually increases. Porn is a superstimulus, so that even occasional use (like occasional cigarette smoking) gradually grows until it starts to become a problem.

Why?

Well, remember that drug addiction or behavioural addiction always rests on deeper problems in life: no one becomes an alcoholic, a crack user, a PMOer, etc., unless there is an underlying emotional problem. It's as straightforward as that.

Someone using PMO a couple of times as an experiment, and then deciding, "This shit is not for me," won't have a problem. But, someone who has a healthy sex life who nonetheless resorts to PMO has a problem! It might be a problem with his or her partner, or it's something else, but there is a problem. The PMO becomes an escape from the problem (instead of dealing with it); the superstimulus acts like an addictive drug; the undealt-with problem grows; and thus the cycle continues.

Does this answer your question?

 

If you were once addicted to alcohol and have now recovered, drinking alcohol again is always going to be dangerous. You have had a long habit of using alcohol to disguise your problems instead of dealing with them.

It's a pattern.

Even with the best intentions, the primitive part of your brain that recognises and enjoys patterns sorely tempt you to drink alcohol to excess when you have a problem. Do that just once, and your problem has become a monster again!

Being addicted to PMO is exactly the same!

Furthermore, because porn is a superstimulus, each time you use it, your brain creates receptors to cope with the increased dopamine. This means that if you use PMO just once and then stop, you not only undo some of your progress, but also immediately go into withdrawal. That withdrawal can last for several days (longer depending on how and why you've PMO's), and during that time you become vulnerable with lowered willpower.

In theory, you could cut down and eventually (after a long, long time) become almost (not entirely) cured, because each use of PMO undoes some of your previous use. But, in practice, given the fact that you're a human and not a robot, this would take years and years, and would require an extraordinary and prolonged strength of willpower. Humans are really bad at using willpower to achieve anything, because willpower fights your brain's internal instincts.

If you're looking for an excuse to do part-time reboots and avoid the pain (the withdrawal and the PAWS) that come with going cold turkey, that is your addiction speaking. It's just not going to work.

 

Everyone has a different background and circumstances. That doesnt change the fact that to wire your brain into the best potential sex life with HUMANS, you are going to have to actually try to do just that and not masturbate. This is the case with your friends, they didnt let it get in the way of that. However, others grow older and let their bad habits grow on them. So obviously, you should try your best to create and maintain relationships at the same time. Ones sex life wont improve if they abstain from PMO and just sit in their room. This is the whole point of NoFap, live your life!

 

It takes a while to progress from normal to PIED. It can take years. The first signs, which won't even be noticed, will be that some manual stimulation is required to get hard; in a young man, no manual stimulation at all is required to get hard for normal sex.

Without doubt, it will get worse over time.

It's not that they're "supposed to not be able". It's that it is a gradual growing problem, that at first won't even be noticed. It creeps up on you, until one day you suddenly wake up to the fact that there's a problem.

My previous post probably explains this. Moderate is too much over the long term. Very occasional use will give enough time for the brain to heal each time, but there's a risk that it can become an escape. It's kind of like drinking alcohol; at first, you might have a glass every week at most, but eventually you're drinking several glass a few days each week.

 

Absolutely.

 

In that case you should try rebooting for 90 days hard mode. After that you should give it a go when you are feeling it. But orgasming to your own hand again only slowers the process.

 

Listen to what @Blahblah00 is saying. He is absolutely correct.

Wait until you have completed your hard reboot. At the moment, your brain is responding to the superstimulus, not to real women. When you are horny for a real woman, then start.

This makes complete sense. You are self-medicating instead of dealing with your problems. Anxiety, OCD, and obsessional thoughts are definitely symptoms of alcohol addiction and of PMO. However, it might be the other way around — you might have anxiety etc. and you're using drugs (including PMO) to try to deal with them. Or, it could be more complicated than either of those scenarios.

Again, makes complete sense. It is exactly the typical behaviour of an addict. By the way, your description sounds as though you are an alcoholic.

Also, a week of no-PMO is not anywhere enough to heal.

What you need to do is…

Get therapy!

Seriously, even if you have to pay for it, it will be cheaper (by a long way) than drinking your life away. If you continue as you are now, you could progress to other drugs. Definitely your life will be wasted.

You can go cold turkey with PMO immediately. For your alcohol, you should check with a doctor first, because going cold turkey from alcohol can cause serious permanent damage; you need to withdraw at a safe rate.

And get therapy. There are many different types of therapy available. CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy), mindfulness, meditation, and many other complementary therapies are out there. Find ones that resonate with you and try them. Some will do nothing for you, some will help a little, and a few will help you tremendously. Go for it. Start researching today!

 

You're still very young. Your body is resilient. Your PIED might be improving, slightly, but more likely your PIED is still mild. The time to heal yourself is now, before it gets worse.

 

So theoretically you could do it this way but that would mean that you continue to have porn in your life for years and years to come as you “taper” down. You are on this website for a reason. And that reason is that you are self aware enough to realize that you have a serious problem with pornography. And that pornography is harming your life in a real way. So do you really want to have this addiction in your life for years and years to come? If relapse is coming only when you are hungover you need to stop drinking to excess or admit that your most pressing addiction is alcohol and enter a twelve step program to deal with that first. I’m really sorry. I know that dealing with depression and OCD really, really sucks. But remember alcohol is a depressant so it may be making your depression worse. And porn badly dis-regulates your dopamine and adrenaline receptors which can also lead to depression and OCD.

 

These are all signs of alcohol addiction. You don't have to drink every day to be addicted. I used to be addicted, and I'd binge drink exactly once a week, while the rest of the week I'd be teetotal.

Please, please, get therapy. Consider the SSRIs as a temporary measure, if they help, but you need more than just medication. The therapy that you already had caused you further ruminations, so either the therapy was badly done or it was an unsuitable type for you. As I wrote earlier, there are many different types of therapy that you can look for. Here are just a few options…

Counselling; meditation; yoga; CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy); hypnotherapy; mindfulness; NLP (neuro-linguistic programming); matrix reimprinting; family systemic constellations; clinical psychology; EFT (emotional freedom technique); Indian head massage; reflexology; massage therapy (by a professional, not a prostitute!); reiki; tai chi; network spinal analysis; craniosacral therapy; and much more.

Research all of these, find one or two that might suit you (maybe at first ones that don't work directly with your thoughts, such as reiki, yoga or craniosacral therapy), and try them as an experiment. As time passes, try as many of these as you want, because each one will provide something different. As I wrote before, some will do nothing for you, some will work quite well, and some will be fantastic. Because each person is different, it's impossible to say in advance which ones will be best for you.

Good luck