Is reading about sexual topics relapsing for a reboot?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Mr. McQuestionable, Jan 5, 2018.

  1. Mr. McQuestionable

    Mr. McQuestionable New Fapstronaut

    I'm doing a basic 90 day reboot abstaining from PMO and wanted to look up and read about sexually related topics that I'm interested in or curious about. Mainly certain acts and fetishes and random stuff like that. No photos (of a sexual nature), just reading about stuff. Is this relapsing when it comes to rebooting, or will it have no effect on the actual reboot. I don't want to read about things that could potentially harm the reboot process.
    Deleted Account likes this.
  2. MarkTT52947

    MarkTT52947 Fapstronaut

    You know the difference between looking for triggering material and looking for information on how to deal with your sexuality and NoFap. You know when you are looking for stimulation or vicarious sex, and when you are trying to understand what can free you and humanity from the monsters.

    You can never reboot or live sanely if you do not know how to confront the reality of sex and sexuality in life and biology. You know when you are looking for stumulation because you can feel it. You know when you are looking for knowledge to fight it.

    Dont try to find some kind of fine line. We've done ourselves in hard enough to need to take action, we can taste the bad stuff by the thrills and chills and hunger it puts into our bodies and mind.

    We know
    [email protected] likes this.
  3. Mr. McQuestionable

    Mr. McQuestionable New Fapstronaut

    After reading this you're totally right when you put it into perspective. I was pretty much just looking to indulge myself in the fantasy of the topic.

    This really helped. Would you consider that a relapse?
    MarkTT52947 likes this.
  4. That’s P substitute which is close to P which is basically P, so yes, relapse! Don’t do it!
    FormerFapaholic likes this.
  5. phwrancesco

    phwrancesco Fapstronaut

    how can read something be a relapse?this thing is goin too far man
    Cloudstephen and pezzy⚡️ like this.
  6. Kipling

    Kipling Fapstronaut

    I would say it's totally not a relapse. But don't try to trick yourself with this or you'll finally relapse.
    dudealone and pezzy⚡️ like this.
  7. Jen@8675309

    [email protected] Distinguished Fapstronaut

    I agree with the @MarkTT52947. If your goal in looking that stuff up was to get a dopamine hit, it's totally a relapse. Remember, not all porn is restricted to videos and images.
    FormerFapaholic likes this.
  8. It depends on what your end goal are. For me I am trying to quit pmo to live a cleaner life with stronger morals and to respect all people. Also I am quitting to rid my brain of addiction. So for me, I wouldn't even look at provocative images even if the person is clothed. But if you are quitting to fix ed or for semen retention or for more energy then it won't change anything as long as it doesn't lead to a relapse down the road.

    Personaly I would warn you against it, but that's just my opinion. A good rule I set for myself is that if I have to question if it's okay or not, then it's probably not okay and any reasoning I come up with to prove the contrary is just a justification.
    Cloudstephen likes this.
  9. MarkTT52947

    MarkTT52947 Fapstronaut

    No hard and fast rules. There is a part of a rebooting and cleaining up which is just detoxification. You dont get the hits from porn, from masturbating, for pornographizing, from triggering, you wean yourself off that as a response. If you are weaned then of course you can investigate and need to learn about sexuality and addction to advance, but gettng yourself clean and sober and un doped is first. It is not just the abstract idea, but a body of practice that has rewired your brain and twisted up your body. You have done it so long that t takes time just to work it out of your system.

    Give it some time
  10. Player 1

    Player 1 Fapstronaut

    Any addiction related thing that you throw on the fire will keep it burning.
    I also suggest you heal first, feeding curiosity with addiction related things can always be dangerous and lead to a relapse.

    Be careful not to trigger anything during reboot.
  11. eagerUser

    eagerUser Fapstronaut

    Any sexual information is a relapse ? I follow channels about healthy sexual life. Is reading them considered a relapse ?
  12. Player 1

    Player 1 Fapstronaut

    What I'm saying is he's reading about fetishes. At some point I was also curious about mine, and by reading some people stories ("my girlfriend did this.... my mom did that...") about how they grew up getting it, I couldn't not imagine the situations without getting triggered.
    If your read about healthy informative things, it should be ok. As long as you don't feel like getting that dirty pleasure out of it, there is no danger nor relapse.
    Last edited: Jan 9, 2018
    eagerUser and Tomoya Okazaki like this.
  13. I don't think it is.If you actively searching for sexual topics without any reason then you are enforcing the same old habit of looking for pornography.The thing is if you acting out the very thing you are addicted from,then I would count that as a relapse.
    Deleted Account and eagerUser like this.
  14. Ymfsm

    Ymfsm Fapstronaut

    From the outside reading a book is a common thing. What truly matters is your attitude. Did you just reading it normally or did you trying to substitute P and get satisfaction by the stimulation of the sexual content you have read.

    You are recognized it man! You are on the good path! Keep on going forward!
    Deleted Account and eagerUser like this.
  15. So you guys that say he can read these erotica, you’re saying that he can indulge in these fantasies and get lost in them? He’s not gonna have a clean reboot if he does that, or even a decent reboot. He will still be thinking like a P addict, warped mind and all. You’re kidding yourself if you think you can go this route, there’s no shortcuts.
    Vulkan likes this.
  16. Vulkan

    Vulkan Fapstronaut

    I agree with themorningsword - if you read erotica, your fantasies can be very much porn like or if you have good imagination even worse. Maybe you will even dream of it. And it can easily trigger some people (like me) to masturbate.
  17. Enderswish604

    Enderswish604 Fapstronaut

    Erotica is porn, in text form, either softcore or hardcore.
    As for academic articles, quite simply, no imho, it can't and shouldn't be considered a relapse.
    If you are going to judge a relapse by a dopamine rush, then I'm afraid you'll find yourself relapsing over the smallest of triggers eventually.
    This is a behavioural addiction, not a substance abuse.
    A good way to judge if you find reading about such articles normal for you, is to think about whether you would be embarrassed to accept having read such things to your friends and family. If the answer is yes, then clearly, for you to indulge in such a reading, is in the end, hypocritical towards who you want to become.

    If you abstain from such material, you do so out of an additional choice to leave it, but even if you don't, as per standard hard mode rules, it's not a relapse. Again, this is for academically driven reads, not some memoir-esque blog about dirty sex or whatever
    Tomoya Okazaki likes this.
  18. Oh whoops, I thought you were reading erotica, but if you’re reading to learn or just to read then it would probably be okay. It all depends how you react to it. If you read it with the intention to learn or gain some sort of insight or maybe even for fun, that wouldn’t be harmful, that’s rather normal. But if you read it and you get turned on and then your mind starts to go crazy out of lust and you just want more “sexual activities” then no, you shouldn’t. It’s all how you react to it
    Vulkan likes this.

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