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Is smartness an innate characteristic?

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by BrSweat, Jul 6, 2021.

  1. Jul 6, 2021 #1
    BrSweat

    BrSweat Fapstronaut

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    Most men in my family have street smart skills, know when to use white lies, know when someone is bullshitting them and are good at figuring out stuff and talking to people. My maternal side isnt like that, my grandpa is the most humble man I have ever known, he is always ready to selflessly help anybody at anytime but people have taken advantage of him and ripped him off aka somewhat gullible. Same for my mother and so I have picked up their traits but I dont want to be like that.

    Worst part is Im a tall guy with above average looks and a decent sex appeal, I notice people looking at me ofcourse on the outside I act manly as hell but thats about it, inside Im dumb as shit with a terribly low self esteem and feel inferior to pretty much every male out there. My question is there anything I can do to overcome this and become smart or would I just be fooling myself by even trying to attempt to become someone I am not?
     
    BrSweat, Jul 6, 2021
    BrSweat, Jul 6, 2021
    #1
    Buddhism Is True likes this.
  2. Jul 6, 2021 #2
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    I actually have a problem very similar to yours I'm smart, I have masculine energy about 95% of the time but I have terrible self-esteem around the opposite sex in all honesty. Whenever a woman complements me I end up hiding my face because I don't want them to see me blush, Whenever women touch me I get a boner heck I even get boners when women shake my hand I'm pretty confident when talking to women but I'm more wimpy around women than I'd like to admit.
     
    Deleted Account, Jul 6, 2021
    Deleted Account, Jul 6, 2021
    #2
    Buddhism Is True likes this.
  3. Jul 7, 2021 #3
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    Social intelligence is an ability you can cultivate. The only way to develop it is to spend time around people. You can read books, watch videos, but the best thing you can do is just start looking for chances to spend time around other people. Grab a friend and start getting comfortable at the bars. Join a volleyball league. The world is full of people who are interested in meeting new people. Become one of them. Your choices aren’t between street smart and easily manipulated. Social intelligence is about knowing who to trust and how to listen. You can learn.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 7, 2021
    Deleted Account, Jul 7, 2021
    Deleted Account, Jul 7, 2021
    #3
    J29 likes this.
  4. Jul 7, 2021 #4
    Deleted Account

    Deleted Account Guest

    You’re 19. This will change with experience. Be patient with yourself. Women want you to take the lead. You need to learn how. The more comfortable you are with what you want the easier it will be for you to take the lead.
     
    Deleted Account, Jul 7, 2021
    Deleted Account, Jul 7, 2021
    #4
    J29 likes this.

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