Is there a way to effectively stop fantasizing and control my own thoughts?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Sleepingbadger, May 2, 2020.

  1. Sleepingbadger

    Sleepingbadger Fapstronaut

    113
    1,238
    123
    Hello! I've been having problems with provocative thoughts, memories of porn and fantasizing lately. These thoughts just pop in my head randomly and then I become tempted.

    I can avoid P and M as long as I don't take any physical action towards them but for some reason these thoughts are really hard to get rid of when tempted. Whenever I manage to throw them off my head they come right back after few minutes. Focusing on something else like studying, washing dishes, playing guitar or playing a round of video game haven't helped at all so far.

    At times it gets so out of hand that I get erect in public which just plain sucks. Also, in the end after a few hours these thoughts usually cause an orgasm. I don't have to watch porn or masturbate, I still get an orgasm due to the mental stimulation.

    These thoughts are so strong and I just can't find a way to get rid of them. Going for a run helps a bit but soon after I step back inside there they are again.

    Can someone give me some tips to get rid of these thoughts, or do I just need to give it some more time without any P or M?
     
    mzxc495 likes this.
  2. mzxc495

    mzxc495 Fapstronaut

    38
    40
    18
    Having exactly the same issue right now. Managed to do several 7 day streaks but now for the last 2 weeks all i can do is 3 days before I get P flashbacks that are so hard to ignore. If I indulge in them for more than a few seconds its very hard not to relapse.
     
    Sleepingbadger likes this.
  3. matt2k12

    matt2k12 Fapstronaut

    154
    307
    63
    ok let me help you. so you have bad thoughts, lets just title them that. do you have bad thoughts all the time? i am sure you do not. say, you have those thoughts, and you walk over the street, and suddenly out of nothing a huge monster truck humps and scares the heck out of you; are those thoughts still here? im sure they are not. you will be in a state of shock and disbelief. your mind will work 110% to gasp the situation. it will not take long, you will realize what happened, and you will cross the street, and the bad thoughts will be gone, and you will think how lucky you were or what an ass that driver was or whatever.
    you see, what im trying to explain to you here is not that your thoughts are a result of your circumstances, but that you have total control about what meaning you give to your circumstances. the meaning you give them, shapes your thoughts, shapes your actions, shapes your destiny. what to learn from all of this? you decided at one point in life to give sex a materialistic meaning. more so, you gave women the meaning that theyre here for pleasure. just by realizing this, you can now give those things another meaning. see sex as a way of intimate sharing between two souls. see women not as objects. i know its hard, especially when you see how dressed many girls nowadays are; but each woman has a soul, they also poop and fart, they are very lively indeed.

    just remember this next time you get an urge or next time vivid images of dirty p comes up in your mind. think about your mother or your sister and how you would never do those things to them. think about how those pornstarts were when they were in childrens age. look where they are now. isnt it sad? and yet there is a demon inside us that will want to still partake in such actions. god bless
     
    Sleepingbadger and thepoorronin like this.
  4. thepoorronin

    thepoorronin Fapstronaut

    Well said
     
  5. Sleepingbadger

    Sleepingbadger Fapstronaut

    113
    1,238
    123
    Thank you for this post! You are very right. This addiction has caused me to see sex as something dirty and lustful, where I should see it as something beautiful that two persons share in order to express their love for each other. In fact nowadays I mostly connect sexuality to feelings of guilt, shame and failure. This addiction has severely twisted the meaning of sex for me and I have a lot of work to do in order to fix it.
     
  6. matt2k12

    matt2k12 Fapstronaut

    154
    307
    63
    yes, and whatever you do, however you progress, never forget this: change is possible! some success stories here are the living example. you will have bad days where you will feel like you will never be healed, but those days will pass, and if you stay on the course long enough, you will live a life beyond your dreams and you will never look back!
     
    Sleepingbadger likes this.

Share This Page