Im a 21 year old guy and I watch alot of porn and I like anal for sure. I hate that I like it because it makes me feel like a pussy and not very manly. I havent been watching too much lately because I really havent been wanting to because of a girl. This week though when i was masturbating and watching it I started getting thoughts in my head of me doing things with the guy or me being that girl and It turned me on Idk if it was because I was in the middle of wacking it or if its because im bisexual now and I only ever feel like this once in a while its not constant I get turned on by those thoughts. Ever since I can remember Ive always noticed if a guy is good looking or not but the thing is when i see a guy thats good looking I dont ever feel strong sexual attraction to them like I do with a girl. When I see certain girls I automatically feel like having sex with them never felt that way with a guy at least not noticeably. Im going to be honest I dont want to be if I am. I have nothing against people that are but its not me. It makes me feel shameful and guilty because of I think of my future spouse whoever that may be that she probably doesnt want some guy that does it both ways. I want to just be a normal manly guy who has a hot ass wife and some kids. I dont feel like I could ever have a relationship with a guy. Anytime I start to fall for a girl I get depressed over this shit because I know she would leave me most likely. I would spend hours watching porn and edging. Could this just possibly be my brain basically getting back to normal? Its been about a month since I was doing the hardcore stuff. I still watch it just not nearly as long anymore. There was multiple times Id watch guys masturbate too sometimes alone sometimes with a cut screen of a girl naked next to it.