Is this what men think?

The difference is that it is socially acceptable to make generalizations about men, it is not socially acceptable to make generalizations about women. Double standard

 

Probably most likely true

 

I can't even begin to seriously converse with someone so delusional and in such denial.
Excuses excuses.

 

Ouch! Well thanks for conversing thus far, it's been fun!

 

//Raises hand, guilty

+15 points for not using the word "conversate"

@SuperFurryThing it's very hard to not just dismiss you and your point of view on sex being is that you've never had it. Pixels arent people my friend. You won't convince these women here of your passionate point of view, they have way too much education and emotional investment to ever concede.

Sometimes when we know we are right we simply are not. Deception and delusion cloud our minds. I'd suggest being kind, try to listen and understand.

-Peace

 

Oh fuck that! That's bullshit! No experience needed to have an opinion. I'm feeling better about where I'm at day-by-day! I'll go toe-to-toe with anyone!

So, I shouldn't hope to convince them at all, but I should try to listen to and understand them? Sounds pretty one-sided. Double standard!

 

I wonder if the sex drive is affected by the "headaches"...

 

You see, the way some of these responses seem to me are very emotional. Yes, women may call all men asshole as long as there is a proper cause for one to declare that. For example, all men who beat up wives and neglect their children are asshole...I am sure no one would oppose my thought on that one.

Anyway, men are more visually stimulated than women. Yes, I am generalizing because at some point generalizing is important. Nothing in the society can get done if we don't generalize some important decisions to move forward. Its fine if you want to disagree if that does not apply to you, good for you. Perhaps you are one of the special snowflakes or outlier.

i came across an interesting scientific research paper about how men are more visual than women when it comes to stimulation. The study had shown more increased activity amygdala and hypothalamus in men than women (P<0.001). "This was true even when women were reported with greater arousal". The images responses are taken from function MRI to observe such neuro activity. The study included a group of men and women with sexual stimulated images and videos. It also compared to the study in rats and the result supported the claim.

In layman term, men are more stimulated visually because their sexual chemical activity changes in their brain indicated a stronger signal than women regardless of how much arousal you are talking about. Statistic only (does not mean physically this exact percent in reality) showed less 0.1% of the samples would reject this claim using such model. For those who are very interested for real in reading it, please look up

Men and women differ in amygdala response to visual sexual stimuli
by Hamann, Stephan, Herman, Rebecca A, and
Nolan, Carla L, published in 2004 in Nature Neuroscience

https://www.nature.com/articles/nn1208#f2

I got access to this journal through my work library database. You may not have access unless your company or school or etc provide assess to that. If you do have access, you really only just need to read through abstract, discussion, and result part to get the idea. If you are mega detail oriented, you should look up what statistic p value mean to understand how null hypothesis work and what significance difference in p value provides. That will help you understand how they obtain a proper sample size, control, and comparison and others.

 

Careful, you are using reason, evidence, science, and logic..... how delusional of you (just kidding )

 

Vulnerability plays into some of it, but that's not the only thing. A lot of us are taught not only to repress our feelings but to also never ask for directions. We're told that a man who doesn't posses an inherit ability to please his woman without her help is less of a man. I think guys would be better lovers if perfectionist attitudes were to leave realm of sex altogether; and don't get me wrong, I'm not saying women don't face the same societal pressures.

I know a lot of men who started watching porn so they could "learn" something about sex so then they wouldn't suck at having it; the irony, I know. I wonder if as many men or women would have even bothered with porn if societies message was "It's okay to suck at sex. Communication is the key."

 

I couldn’t agree more for both sides! The funny thing is there is no catch all for “good” sex either. Everyone is different in regards to it.

 

Exactly. Yet in our society you have articles directed toward men that say "Make her yours with these moves" and ones directed towards women that say "21 ways to make him happy in bed" instead of the message "Just talk to each other for fuck sake! It's about progress, not perfection." The problem is that message doesn't sell porn, magazines, or a whole host of other useless shit.

 

I dont think “staring at the pie” is okay.

A man can be in a committed relationship, and still see other attractive women, notice that they are attractive, and move on without it becoming more in their mind. For many men that will require some training and practice, because while its possible, its almost NEVER modeled for us by anyone while we are growing up.

Stack on top of this that most of us are introduced to porn at a super young age when our brains are hyper impressionable, our natural proclivity to Visual stimuli, and a serious absence of good role models in this area, and you have a lust epidemic that isnt addressed because its considered normal. Meanwhile men and women alike suffer. Men with an addiction they dont want and feel deeply ashamed of. Women wondering what’s wrong with them that their husband has this problem (its never the wife’s fault) and feeling betrayed by him.

It a complicated mess that takes a long time to sort out. My wife and I are are approaching a year and a half into our healing journey and its a roller coaster, but we are finally at a point where our marriage is stabilizing, healing, and this doesn’t loom over us 24/7 anymore. The reason why I share this, is because I want to show that a man (me), who was sexually abused by someone he trusted, then introduced to hardcore p in 7th grade, then went on to try and manage a sex addiction his entire life without realizing it, just for it to rear its ugly head years into marriage can (with support) repair and rebuild himself into who he should be if he wants to. It takes a steady stream of ego deaths, willingness to learn, and often times a radical amputation of friends and/or family members who are enablers.

But it can be done. Depending on the situation, sometimes the man needs to lose his marriage to sort this out. I have heard stories of men who lost their marriage, then rebuild themselves, and get re married to their former spouse a few years later. There is always hope.

 

Yep. So wise. My addiction loses power the more I learn who I am. I have contempt for myself when I am out of touch with my own identity, but the more I know myself, the more compassionate I am with myself, and the more I dont do things to harm myself in large or small ways.

 

I agree, its a good video, but its going to help men understand themselves more than its going to help hurting women understand hurting men. I would be cautious around sharing content intended to fix a perspective with hurting people.

 

I didn't intend to hurt anybody with this video, if I did, my apologies, it was a side effect. I intended to invite women come and see from the men's POV. I felt that I was being treated unfairly by these pie assumptions.

One of my best friend's GF is jealous as hell, while my friend has been oogling since his birth. She gets very angry when he does is. However, she just accepts it. I tried to explain her a trillion times what is going on with us (men), but she persists. I know my friend. No matter if his GF is absent or present, he will oogle, he will even x-ray other women from top to toe. If his GF is absent, he might tease some of them. But this is his limit. I've tried many times to make him cross the line, but he never did, regardless how much I pushed him. I didn't do it in order to destroy his relationship, but because I wanted to see if his GF's fears are real. They're not and I can stare her in the eyes and guarantee that she can be relaxed. A couple of years ago, he uploaded a photo with his cousin that is very beautiful. When his GF saw the photo, she demanded that he delete the photo and he did...

Also, I used to have a female wannabe friend with benefits who was 100% cool with that kind of stuff. I asked her if she would accept her SO going to strip bars with his friends. Her response was thumbs up and I got stunned. She clarified that he should just be careful not to get infected by STDs.

These are two exactly opposite experiences. A guy that loves oogling with a jealous GF and a girl that is too cool to be true. The first shouldn't oogle when his GF is present. He has reduced it 90% BTW. The second one, if we exercised our benefits, I wouldn't oogle when she was present...

 

I'll never forget what my aunty said to me once when I was a teenager:

"Before you settle down, try every ice cream flavour in the shop. Then when you find your favourite flavour, stick to that one." Simple yet good advice using a similar food analogy.

The truth is, some men get to try different flavours before committing to their favourite one. Some men don't get to try lots of different flavours so they always wonder and get tempted by what other flavours taste like. And other men are just greedy or obese and they can't stop eating!

 

Just because he doesn't do it in front of you doesn't mean he doesn't do it when no one is around. Most SA are very careful to make sure no one knows what they're doing, even friends who are also unfaithful because that's still a witness who could tell on them and they are ashamed of their behavior and lack of self control so they don't want to advertise it. He could be lying to you, addicts lie tlie to everyone, if he were an addict I mean. I'm not saying he is one, I don't know him. I'm speaking generally about lies and secrets addicts keep even from their closest friends.

 

I wish that when I was younger, I had someone like your aunt in my life, giving me that same advice

 

Also I took it to mean that these woman are hurting, so they are people who are hurt, hurting people. Not that you were hurting them with the video.