It seems overwhelming

I'm 26, female, virgin, Christian, and single. Just today, I ended a long distance relationship and it was a hit to the proverbial balls of my self esteem.

Sometimes I feel like I'm not capable of having a "real" not long distance relationship. Because that's what I truly want! I want closeness. I want to sit in the same room as someone and not do anything together. Today I had a thought that I will be single forever. That I'll never have what I desire most; a life and love partner.

But instead of choosing P, I chose gluten free pizza , talking with my accountability partner, playing some games on my iPad, and soon gonna start studying for my anatomy class.

Sadness will not last forever. Loneliness is temporary. I have Wonderful friends who treasure me and who I trust with my whole life

I just want a man that I can do that with too, who is not far away. Who doesn't want to change me, because I'm just starting to love who I am. Who makes me laugh harder than anything. Who gets me and wants me to get them. Who takes his time, listens to the Holy Spirit, and is sensitive to His voice.

Sigh I don't know. Just feeling a lot of stuff.