Its 90th Day and Why I want to continue my journey towards 365th Day

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by wholenewlife, Jan 29, 2017.

  1. wholenewlife

    wholenewlife Fapstronaut

    Few months ago, it was unthinkable (over 20 years of Addiction) for me to imagine being NoFap for a week but today having passed 90th Day mark, any change looks extremely possible and the limit is only in our mind and commitment.

    How has this changed my life so far?

    01. At work, I am much more confident in expressing my ideas, in the meetings rooms or board room. I have no hesitation in expressing my ideas and I do not care much about what others think about me. This does not mean I do not respect them. In fact I respect everyone and listen to all of them much more than before. But simply I am much more assertive and confident. And im trying to improve on this continuously now.

    02. I am not feeling the tiredness nowadays. I do not sleep middays even at weekends, I spend more time planning, learning and brainstorming to better my life. These are not exaggerations. I did try these before when I was using porn but never done anything properly always felt guilty or down. So being on this challenge has definitely improved my self-esteem, testosterone level and over all energy level.

    03. My mind cannot trick me into fantasizing or masturbation anymore. Before I used to masturbate every night on bed just to get sleep. My mind was tricked to think that I have to get up tomorrow and go to work, not sleeping long hours will make it difficult for me to get to work. So, I will be awake for a while, this thinking would kick in, I would masturbate, release it and sleep. But I observed how I get to this sort of thinking and found out that because every time I masturbated to get sleep, flow of the dopamine and the pleasure rewired my neural network and created a belief that I can only sleep by masturbating. After I started on NoFap challenge, I did have nights where I was awake but forced my mind to think that I am not going to be tricked by this un-real wiring. As each day passed, the previous days I slept without masturbation became affirmation that I can sleep without masturbation. And it also proved to me that our brain actually works based on a rewarding system. Before the reward for releasing the dopamine through masturbation now I have changed the rewarding system to feel happy and reward if I am not masturbating. Its really magic how things changed. Its because I am not masturbating to get sleep anymore, I do not feel tired anymore the next day. How cool is that?

    04. One of the key think that I always kept in my mind that past 90 days is that I SHOULD TRY MY BEST TO AVOID BEING ALONE AT HOME. In my opinion being alone its being alone is that critical factor that forced me to indulge in PMO in the past. I know its not possible to completely avoid being alone. So whenever I knew that I am going to be alone, I pro-actively push my self to go to gym or complete a course online or some other activity to keep me busy interested and not bored. This has actually worked for me. Not sure this will work for everyone but it worked for met. It was difficult initially but its fun now.

    05. One of the benefit of being on this challenge for me is that I do not get annoyed or angry as much as I used to before I started this challenge. I am not perfect now, I still get annoyed or angry some time but the point is its not that frequent anymore. So this gives me the confidence that I am much less impulsive now and more reliable in terms of my behaviors.

    One quick tip, I found that checking in every day on my journal before I go to bed to say I have completed the day successfully, have actually worked magic. I think two main things happened in this regard. One is I did not want to give up on the guys and accountability partners who help and motivate me on the site and my thread and I did not want to lie to them and post fake accomplishments. So I had to be honest. This helped. And the other thing is checking in everyday before bed time, acts as a reminder, affirmation and acts as a great motivator.

    So, for these reasons and for many other reasons that I did not get time write here, I want to continue my challenge to hit the 365 days’ mark. I know I took up a large challenge and initially it was not easy. I am almost ¼ way through so I can trust my self in this journey much more than ever before.
    Last edited: Jan 29, 2017
  2. sirfapstinence

    sirfapstinence Fapstronaut

    Very inspiring and I wish you all the best for the future bud!
    Deleted Account and wholenewlife like this.
  3. martyg

    martyg Fapstronaut

    Hey man that's really great to read about the positive effects I hope you do the year that would be an amazing mile stone. I just wanted to ask some advice I'm on day 24 no porn and day 11 nofap I am struggling I was doing so well then I faped and the reset has left me feeling like shit really down and my craving for porn has gone mad did you find that there were any points that were harder in the 90 days? I know we are all different in that regard I have been a bit reclusive on here the last week which hasn't helped so I'm trying to put myself back into the comity a bit more.
    wholenewlife likes this.
  4. wholenewlife

    wholenewlife Fapstronaut

    Thanks for your motivation.

    I had this addiction over 20 years, and this is the longest i have been able to manage to stay without. I failed a million times. But i realized the main mistake i made was beating myself every time i relapsed. So i decided to not to be hard on myself. Go easy on me and observe how my thinking works when I had the urges. I kind of started a background thinking, so in the beginning of this challenge, I used to get urges, but then i will start reading nofap guides, watch videos, others' stories and read news, stay back at work a bit to finish off things. By doing this, i avoided me being alone which was the number 1 trigger for me. So i think everyone is unique. You have to observe your thinking and the pattern of the thinking especially when you have urges. It may or may not be the approach that would work for you but you could try if you would like to.

    After about a month, i realized it is possible to control the thinking. If I think about looking at porn, i would force myself to start thinking very positively about women, i would think about how tired i would get leading to the next day being very grumpy. I also set goals to be achieved within 3 months, 6 months and a year in my career and person development areas. So the question i would ask myself every time i had urge is i wasted 20 years, do not have a lot of time left to live a life i always wanted. It will be too late if I don't get things straight. So this sort of thinking helped me a lot.

    I listened to this as well :

    Let me know what you think.
  5. Sadder_But_Wiser

    Sadder_But_Wiser Fapstronaut

    Remarkable. I'm speechless actually. Even while reading your post I can feel the confident, stable and good vibes coming from you; someone who's actually getting their shit together and reclaims control! Hell yeah! All the best for the next 275 days and beyond. Respect and congrats! Please continue to share inspire and motivate.
    wholenewlife likes this.
  6. wholenewlife

    wholenewlife Fapstronaut

    Thanks a lot.

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