I've had enough - Ordered a Chastity Device

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by TomBradyGOAT, Mar 6, 2020.

  1. PIED? If you can't fap without porn, you probably have PIED. As @+TenPercent says, after you have done NoFap for a while, your functionality will start to return. It might happen within the first 90 days, but it might take longer, depending how deep down the hole you have gone.
    OK, this is just wrong.

    First, sex isn't just "recreational" unless you do one-night stands or the swinger scene or likewise. It's a strong bonding and sharing activity between two people. Humans, and a select few other mammals, use sex for bonding. It's important for partner-relationships.

    Second, plenty of highly successful people with great cognitive function have regular sex. My mind was always razor sharp until I suffered illness-related decline, and I had plenty of sex with my partner. Overindulging, sure, but once a month? Only if you are ridiculously unfit.
    I live in the UK where we get little to no sun during the winter months, and the medical establishment recommends vitamin D supplements. You might want to try the same, but check with your doctor of pharmacist. Night shifts are hard, so best of luck with that.
     
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  2. TomBradyGOAT

    TomBradyGOAT Fapstronaut

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    Check out the book Cupids Poisoned Arrow. It explains why orgasmic sex is not good for you and how its not actually a bonding activity.
     
  3. I can tell you that no relationship with a sexual woman would last without regular sex. She would become resentful, and leave for a man who is willing to have sex.
     
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  4. This is a great book! And you sure are committed to going through with your plan despite all the concern from people (myself included) on this thread. Some worry about what you are doing, while others worry about why.
    And, you have already ordered two chastity devices. When do they arrive?
    From personal experience, I would recommend a stainless steel device, btw, but it probably makes sense to wait and see how the other devices work for you before buying anything else. You might change your mind about wearing one 24/7 once you feel how uncomfortable they are after a few hours . . . and how painful it is when you get an erection (the body's natural rhythm) when you sleep!

    The book Cupid's Poisoned Arrow is about karezza which is essentially non-orgasmic love making and the author suggests lots of love making, as human bonding is so important to our health.

    @TomBradyGOAT - using a device to break the cycle of PMO makes sense to me. And, maybe someday you can even use a device when not making love with your partner . . . just be careful about you're expressed desire to break your dick! That really would mess up your potential for having a successful karezza based non-orgasmic relationship!
     
  5. TomBradyGOAT

    TomBradyGOAT Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the concern. One is arriving next week and the other should be arriving by Wednesday or Thursday this week. One is silicone and the other one is hard plastic, the steel ones looked painful. Im not worried about potentially damaging my dick because I have no interest in ever having any kind of relationship with any woman, not even karezza.

    I just want to rebalance my hormonal system and recieve the needed benefits from nofap so that i can accomplish my dream in life
     
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  6. TomBradyGOAT

    TomBradyGOAT Fapstronaut

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    Already purchased it. Should be arriving by Wednesday or Thursday.
     
  7. Moon Shard

    Moon Shard Fapstronaut

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    lol there’s no shame in that. Why not call your internet providers and just ask them to put adult filters on your WiFi or whatever it is people do with that?
     
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  8. I'm retracting my earlier implied support for this.

    I'm not going to tell you how to live your life. And whatever works for you works for you.

    However I had a conversation about this yesterday with my partner. It was a difficult one, but through it I came to realise that I was trying to enable my addiction, that this was a way of feeding into it. I know that sounds weird, but this addiction wants to survive, so it makes you think this would be a good idea - I think if I'd done this then I'd be tempted to touch myself when putting it on/taking it off; I'd make masturbating even more taboo; I'd link the pain to arousal; when I did remove it, it would feel so good to be free and this would heighten the arousal; even wearing I'd get stimulation from the cage or be able to stimulate myself.

    Maybe this only applies to me, but I just want to offer my thoughts.
     
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  9. Themadfapper

    Themadfapper Fapstronaut

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    I'm not sure what a "sexual woman" is, but there have been countless sexless marriages that have survived. Probably the vast majority of them end up that way?

    I'm not sure what "Karezza" is. Some say it's basically cuddling, googling it shows
    Sounds like an edging version of sex, lol.
     
  10. I have to ask now . . . what is your dream in life?

    And, I'm feeling more inclined to support you in your endeavour if you are not intending to have a relationship with a woman. Does that mean that you are not intending to be sexual with anyone?

    If that is the case . . . you might very well be able to really master semen retention and stay orgasm free for life! :cool:
    I wanted to give up orgasms forever, but I also wanted to have a girlfriend. This is my experience:
    I managed to go 125 days without an emission (and felt amazing!) but on day 111 I had a "dry" wet dream. I didn't even know that was possible, but I had an orgasm in my sleep - just the mental/brain chemistry part of an orgasm and woke up feeling just like I had an orgasm even though there was never an emission. I struggled with fantasy and wanting to have that experience again. On day 125, I was super aroused and actually had an emission while trying to stuff my erection into my chastity cage. Perhaps if I had put it on sooner? Maybe that experience would support your decision to go 24/7.

    Then, I made it 130 days after only having that one emission. This time it ended with an actual wet dream. And I think that was triggered by the fact that I had started dating someone - all the arousal that comes with starting a new relationship made things really complicated.

    As it turned out, my new girlfriend was already familiar with the concept (and practice) of karezza but . . . not completely sold on it and not to thrilled (she was very frustrated actually) with the prospect of "her man" not ever having orgasms with her. :oops:

    I've had to let go of the ideal of practicing long term semen retention. At least for now, during the "honey moon phase" of the relationship. Maybe, if I'm lucky, I can have less orgasms in the future.

    I envy your singleness and admire your willingness to go all out in your desire to overcome your sexual urges, rewire your brain and achieve your dreams. Good luck!
     
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  11. TomBradyGOAT

    TomBradyGOAT Fapstronaut

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    I wont give every detail of my dream but it involves making a widely popular and successful comic series and being a muscisian with the electric guitar, synthesizer, drums, and maybe a few other things.

    Yeah, I dont plan on being sexual with anyone. I dont see the point if you lose your powers because of it. Even though Karezza is the correct form of pair bonding, I dont want any accidents occurring so im not interested in that either.

    With your device how long did you leave it on and when did you put it on and take it off?

    Thanks for the advice and story!
     
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  12. TomBradyGOAT

    TomBradyGOAT Fapstronaut

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    I live in an apartment where the internet is controlled by them so I dont know how I would go about that. Also my phone has its own Wi-Fi anyways from dataplan which I need for my driving job.
     
  13. The idea of wearing one 24/7 is appealing on some levels (lock it and forget about it, how cool would that be) but there are challenges of comfort and hygiene, and depending what you do for work, or if you travel, that might create challenges, too. I have definitely heard of guys who do wear them 24/7, so I suppose it's possible, but I literally only made it through one night in my life with it on.

    When I first started I wore it almost every day. Often I would put it on as soon as I got home from work. Sometimes I would fall asleep with it on, but nocturnal erections meant waking up in excruciating pain. :eek:

    To be honest, I find it really calming to wear. I always feel my anxiety levels drop once it's on, but it will often pinch and get uncomfortable within a few hours, even after years of practice and trying half a dozen different models.

    These days, I mostly reserve the chastity device for emergencies. I don't want to rely on it. Once it's on, I usually will only leave it on for a few hours. By that time, the emergency situation has passed and I'm feeling much calmer.
     
  14. TomBradyGOAT

    TomBradyGOAT Fapstronaut

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    Fuck this sounds really scary. Especially the part where you said you woke up in excruciating pain. I'm not as happy and amped try this anymore. I am definetly going to keep the key on me the first week or so. Holy shit I'm really scared now!
     
  15. Reading all the newer posts brings up a couple of points.
    Even those wearing it 24/7 aren't exactly that — you have to take it off at least once a day to clean both the device and you. (Can you imagine the smell and the infection if you don't?)
    It should be scary! Think about what you're doing to your body. Imagine doing something like this to your arm, keeping your arm in a permanently bent position. It will hurt, and rightly so.

    People who have a chastity fetish and use these devices full-time tend to end up with tiny penises (I've seen photos).

    In a previous post, I suggested that you don't use the device all the time, but instead only when you feel that you are entering a weak phase. Use a timed lock for this. Don't wear the device when you're out and about, because you don't masturbate then. Only wear it when you find yourself starting to open porn or touch yourself: at that point, immediately close down the porn, put on the device, and put your key into a timed device for three hours. At the end of the three hours, you should be back in control (as @+TenPercent says), but if not, just add an hour to your timer.

    You can get reasonably cheap timed locks. Either a kitchen timer (intended for people trying to stop themselves from binge eating cookies or other treats), or a timed padlock that you can use to padlock your key to something out of reach of your penis (like a curtain rail).

    Doing it this way prevents you from relapsing, while helping you to learn self-discipline. When I had the same idea as you, I actually didn't need to put on the device at all — the mere threat of putting it on was enough to concentrate my mind!
     
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  16. By "a sexual woman", I mean a woman who enjoys healthy sex.

    As for ending up in sexless marriages, you are right to call me out on that. A number of marriages end up that way, not through choice, but because the couple grows apart and doesn't have either the courage or knowledge of how to end it (or, in some closed countries, the ability to do so).
     
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  17. TomBradyGOAT

    TomBradyGOAT Fapstronaut

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    So I got the device today and this is what it looks like for those who may think im trolling. Potential Trigger btw

    20200310_114302.jpg 20200310_114235.jpg 20200310_114223.jpg

    First thing im gonna so when I get time is fantasize and see if it causes any pain when I get an erection.
     
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  18. TomBradyGOAT

    TomBradyGOAT Fapstronaut

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    I probably will take a week off so I can get my sleep schedule correct or atleast lower my working days because I'm always falling asleep during class and have little energy. I cant leave this job however. The pay is really good because I'm surrounded by 3 different universities so I make good money off other college students.

    I dont know if Napoleon Hill is a con man, but his book outwitting the devil is extremely good con man or not, and so is think and grow rich. I'll look more into it.

    I dont want to have sex or have kids though. I already bought it so I'm gonna try it out and see what happens

    I will try this timer method if I find this thing too uncomfortable to wear. Thanks for looking out
     
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  19. TomBradyGOAT

    TomBradyGOAT Fapstronaut

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    Alright so I finally figured out how to put this thing together.

    It dosent actually feel to bad. Of course the first thing I tried was seeing if I could get an erection. I pulled up videos that would be extremely easy for me to get an erection too and I could barely even get a semi erection. It also kind of scrapes the top portion of my dick because the rubber part is very cheaply made and keeps falling off. This made me very quickly lose interest in watching any porn whatsoever. On a scale of 1-10 the pain is about a 3. It feels way more strange than it does painful.

    I attempted to see if I would be able to rip it off and I cant its very tight and secure not to mention the extreme pain it causes to my balls, so that is not even an option. Its also impossible to masturbate in this thing. The amount effort it would take would be the amount of effort it would take to try and fap and orgasm with just your mind, so masturbating is not an option either.

    There is a little bit of a bulge this thing causes in my pants, but nothing to out of the ordinary for anyone to really notice or say anything about it.

    It makes a little bit of noise walking around because of the locks but if I wear about 2 pairs of underwear or a pair of gym shorts under my pants than it makes no noise, even if im running.

    Its kind of hard to force myself to piss so I can only really piss if I really NEED to go. It just comes out straight threw the hole in the device.

    So far so good. It seems like it just needs to take a little getting use too and in about 2 weeks wearing it should become normal and comfortable. On Friday if eveeything is still all good, I'll be taking and leaving the keys at home.
     
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