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Jagliana's Journal | An S.O's perspective

Discussion in 'Significant Other Journals' started by Jagliana, Feb 4, 2018.

  1. Psalm27:1my light

    Psalm27:1my light Fapstronaut

    4,195
    7,774
    143
    I have a friend who broke up with a guy because he didn’t like pizza! We both laughed at that because I said I couldn’t be with someone who didn’t like pizza. My husbands personality was what attracted me. Still does. I get it though. I think my temper would’ve gotten the best of me if my husband was the type to ogle women. That would make it seriously hard. Especially given all the outdoor hobbies we have. I will admit, I do like seeing him dressed in his class A uniform! I think last night will be the final time. He is officially retired. Hang in there! It will get better and better.
     
    Jagliana likes this.
  2. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    Wonderful news!! I hope you both enjoy his retirement! <3
     
    Psalm27:1my light likes this.
  3. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1006: 12/18/2020

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Morning Time with Wade.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, after a wonderful trifecta, we were both so exhausted after the last few days, so we just watched one of our guilty pleasures because it is freaking hilarious; 90 Day Fiance. Then he headed out to work and I went straight to bed.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to 5 Ways Your Mind Is Tricking You All Day Everyday", in this episode, we hear about 5 of the ways your mind is tricking you every day. Remember, there will always be someone who doesn't see your worth. Do not let that person be you.

    This morning, I had a doctor's visit, so after dropping off our kids at school, we went to the appointment and then hit up Costco to pick up a few things. Throughout we chatted about random stuff, which is good sometimes. I'm still down about all my issues, but it felt nice just to have some alone time with him, without other noise. Luckily there weren't too many people at Costco, so not many triggers either. Now, he plans on staying up and making a yummy new recipe I found, for "Kharcho Beef Soup", I can not wait to try it. I hope our kids will give it a chance, but they are annoying when it comes to food, so who knows.

    Hopefully, we will both have the energy to watch a movie tonight, we never seem to have enough hours in a day.


    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: No major triggers.:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    5 Harmful Psychological Tricks Your Mind Plays On You


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  4. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1007: 12/19/2020

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Morning Walk.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, we finished the Mandolorian and Wade was acting like a little kid in a candy shop, it was so cute lol. Then we went to bed, had some 'fun' (long over-due) and after, went to bed.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to How To Trick Your Brain Into Doing Hard Things And Enjoying It", in this episode, we learn how to trick your brain into doing hard things and enjoying it. Remember, if you avoid doing difficult things, the rewards for doing them will avoid you.

    This morning, we began listening to "Barack Obama Discusses Putin, Nationalism, and Global Politics" on Pod Save The World. Tommy and Ben talk with former President and current Worldo Barack Obama about some of the biggest foreign policy challenges and accomplishments addressed in his book, A Promised Land. Those include the financial crisis and the rise of nationalism, the decision to send more troops to Afghanistan and tensions with the Pentagon leadership, the Cairo speech, dealing with Russia and Vladimir Putin, the politics of terrorism, including GITMO and the drone program, the rise of China and climate change, and some of the absurdities of traveling abroad as President. It was such an intelligent and in-depth interview, tomorrow we should be able to finish it.

    Now, we have the rest of the day to be homebody's and just relax.

    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: No triggers.:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    How I tricked my brain to like doing hard things


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]

    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  5. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1008: 12/20/2020

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.



    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Morning Grind.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, although I was annoyed/upset with him from his earlier antics and my mood for the night was upended. I'm tired of repeating myself and debating or arguing nonsense, especially in front of my parents, because I don't want to hear more shit later - yet, he continues to put me in those situations. I know my parents like the back of my hand, I know how they will react to certain situations, but he just keeps at it and it really hit my breaking point last night. Then to top it off, he does not hear himself, so even if he is talking, it's loud and sounds like he is arguing, which last night also upset our little one, which I hate to see, I don't want her getting used to it. He gave me a trifecta, although I resisted at first, of course, it was nice as usual, but my mood was still messed up for the rest of the night.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to It's Time To Focus On Your Own Happiness", in this episode, Les Brown talks with us about why it's time for you to focus on your own happiness. Remember, it's not selfish to make your happiness a priority - it's necessary.

    This morning, we finished listening to "Barack Obama Discusses Putin, Nationalism, and Global Politics" on Pod Save The World. Tommy and Ben talk with former President Barack Obama about some of the biggest foreign policy challenges and accomplishments addressed in his book, A Promised Land. It was a great conclusion and I have to say, in this short interview, I ended up learning quite a bit. Then headed out on an errand, there were a lot of people out this morning, but no major triggers thank goodness. Then, we got home and it began, yet again. First, it was about something I bought and then with him making remarks, that I've warned him about making, causing my mom to get upset and say "oh, he is kicking us out". All things I've predicted before warned him about and yet, it is like he doesn't take my word for it and continues.

    Anyhow, I think it will be a long day today... however, I plan on getting to some stuff, like organizing my med's and start the process of reevaluating our 2021 budget.


    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: No major triggers.:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    Your Peace Is Priceless


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  6. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1009: 12/21/2020

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Morning Walk.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, he gave me a lovely trifecta, in silence so that both of us could just exhale the bullshit/noise, we are both overwhelmed and exhausted with everything. Then, we watched some TV and headed to bed early.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to Healthy Habits That Will Improve Your Overall Health", in this episode, we learn about some healthy habits that will improve your overall health. Remember, healthy habits are every bit as addictive as unhealthy habits, but they're much more rewarding.

    This morning, during our walk, we began listening to "Psychologist Reveals How to Stop Telling Yourself Negative Thoughts" an interview with Marisa Peer, on Women of Impact with Lisa Bilyeu. She is a Famed hypnotherapist, named the Best British Therapist by Men’s Health Magazine, has devoted her life to helping people resolve childhood trauma, find love, and lead healthier lives. Her primary insight is that the mind does what you tell it to, but most people do not understand how to talk effectively with their own minds. So far in this episode, Mrs. Peer explains how you’ve been lying to yourself. Yes, every day in the privacy of your own mind, you tell yourself lies over and over again. Most of the time, these lies are destructive and push your thoughts into negative places, thus bubbling up bad emotions and causing you to feel sad, depressed, anxious, frustrated, or angry. Well, it’s time to make a change—to start lying to yourself in a positive way. It’s time to stop criticizing yourself and start praising yourself instead. Ways to stop telling yourself destructive lies and begin speaking to yourself in a positive and uplifting way that informs your thoughts and behaviors to change for the better. Why the thoughts you create dictate your emotions and behaviors, the power of connecting your mind and body, why you need to confront your thoughts head on and discover the root cause of them, why you have to begin telling yourself positive lies, why creating stories in your head is dangerous, how our thoughts influence our relationships, what RTT is and the power it has, how childhood trauma and lack of our needs being met influences us as adults, and why it’s okay to mess up time and time again. Wade (and I - I guess) listened to her explain lies we tell ourselves and not being able to accept compliments and heard: Jag, Jag, Jag. I am horrible at accepting/believing compliments being thrown my way. Sometimes it makes me cringe, but for the sake of our kids, I always act normal and say thank you. However, internally I don't feel like those compliments should be said because I don't believe them myself. It's complicated, I know.

    Wade has a remote doctor's appointment and will be taking a nap after. The little one is done with her schoolwork for the day, so I might be able to just relax... that is if my parents don't waltz in with more stuff for me to do. Fingers crossed.

    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: No triggers.:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    HEALTHY HABITS CHECKLIST


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  7. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1010: 12/22/2020

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Breakfast.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, he gave me a lovely trifecta, it helped a lot of my aches. Then we watched 90 Day Fiance, a guilty comedic pleasure. It's awesome that now he finds it hilarious to watch as well, so we can laugh and analyze it together! Haha, who would have thought?

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to How To Find Meaningful Work", in this episode, The School of Life talks about how to find meaningful work. Remember, meaningful work gives life purpose and connects you to something bigger than yourself.

    This morning, Wade got me breakfast on his way home from work, I really appreciated that. I watched a few videos, some trailers for HBO Max since we took advantage of their promotion. Then I helped my little one get her school work going and done. Now, I can edit Wade's One Day at a Time weekly video and have the rest of the day to check out some of those new shows and work a little bit more on my elephant goal.


    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: Love how my tank feels and fits.:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    How to Find Meaningful Work


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  8. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1011: 12/23/2020

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Morning Walk.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, we watched Night at the Museum, where our eldest was paying attention to a good amount of the movie, which is not typical, but I am happy about it. Then, after they all went to bed, Wade and I continued watching 'The Expanse' while he gave me a nice hand and foot rub. Then, he left for work and I went to bed - actually sleeping a good amount, for once.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to Why Be Average When You Were Born To Be Amazing", in this episode, Freddy Fri has an inspiring message for you on how to be amazing. Remember, the price of excellence is discipline, the cost of mediocrity is disappointment.

    This morning, as we walked, we finished listening to "Psychologist Reveals How to Stop Telling Yourself Negative Thoughts" an interview with Marisa Peer, on Women of Impact with Lisa Bilyeu. She is a Famed hypnotherapist, named the Best British Therapist by Men’s Health Magazine, has devoted her life to helping people resolve childhood trauma, find love, and lead healthier lives. In conclusion, Mrs. Peer explains how your issues have a job and function, why you have to be very careful of what you say to kids, how our problems can be traced back to childhood, how you should approach parenting or treating children, and where you can keep in touch and follow her for more advice. We also talked about some conversations he had at work, I feel for him and he knows that.

    Today, the girls went into school, so I have some peace and quiet for a few hours before their holiday vacation begins. I better enjoy it, because the next few weeks will be full of noise pollution.


    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: No triggers today.:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    From Average To Amazing


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  9. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1012: 12/24/2020

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Morning Walk.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, he gave me a lovely trifecta, which got me pretty sleepy. We finished The Expanse, now we have to wait until next Wednesday for the next episode! wahhhh. Then began catching on Fear the Walking Dead. I decided to go to bed a little earlier since I was passing out and he left for work.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to How To Be More Disciplined In Your Life", in this episode, we learn some valuable lessons on how to be more disciplined. Remember, unless you change how you are, you'll always have what you've got.

    This morning, while we walked, we listened to "The Real Way to Fix Bad Communication with Your Partner" a Q&A, on Relationship Theory with Tom & Lisa Bilyeu. During this set, they discuss ways to identify patterns of negative behavior in your relationship and how to fix them for good so that you can communicate together in a healthy way. How you should be communicating with your partner, dangerous patterns to look out for in your relationship, why you need to just be clear about your feelings, how to prevent problems from happening again, and why putting pressure on your partner isn’t doing the relationship any good. We wholeheartedly agree communication is everything! especially honest, raw, and rational forms of it. I did get triggered during our walk, the entire time while my triggered was running a mile a minute, the background noise in my head was blaring too: "HOLIDAYS, DON'T RUIN THE HOLIDAYS" I felt like there was a war taking place in my brain. I got through it as well as I possibly could, then we quickly stopped by the supermarket, before heading home.

    Wade went to bed, I'm spending the day with the girls. The little one is taking a break and I recommended she turn on "Art for Kids Hub" on YouTube and follow along, she is really enjoying it. Later, I will 'recommend' some dance videos too. This evening we will have a small meal together and we are allowing them to open their Christmas stockings, should be fun.

    Merry Christmas Eve everyone!
    [​IMG]


    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: .:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    How to Make Self Discipline Your Superpower


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  10. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1013: 12/25/2020

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Smiles.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, we continued watching Fear the Walking Dead; a show that has now really picked up compared to the original Walking Dead. He gave me a lovely hand and foot rub while we watched. Then, it was time for bed and he left for work. The wind was crazy all night, making it difficult to sleep.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to Enjoy More Personal Freedom By Developing Your Self-Motivation", in this episode, we hear a great message on how to set yourself up to enjoy more personal freedom by developing your self-motivation. Remember, no freedom comes without a cost.

    This morning, my little one was up bright and early, she was excited to see Santa loved her cookies and milk! but also, had ants in her pants to open all of the gifts too. Wade almost got stuck at work! but luckily made it home on time, and just like the year before brought a dozen Dunkin' Donuts for us all. Then we all opened our gifts, everyone enjoyed what they got - with the exception of my dad, who does not know how to accept a gift like a normal person. Now, we are watching Klaus on Netflix, so far so good, those who said to watch it were right.

    Later today, we plan on watching a family movie, with some finger foods - pretty much spending the whole day as a family, which is what Christmas is all about these days, ain't it?


    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: .:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    Jocko Willink: DISCIPLINE EQUALS FREEDOM


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  11. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1014: 12/26/2020

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Morning Family Time.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, he was really tired, so we just watched some TV. He was passing out and asked me if I was sleepy too, I told him 'not really, seems I caught second wind'. Then, he said let me give you a hand and foot rub, to get you sleepier. I instantly felt bad for mentioning anything, cause I felt as though it may come off as though I only mentioned it in order to hint to him that I need/want a hand and foot rub, which is not the case, I was just answering a question. Of course, he said he knows I didn't mean that, but still. Then we went to bed shortly after.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to What Is Mindfulness and How It Helps You", in this episode, we get a clear answer to the question 'What is Mindfulness' from Monash University. Remember, just remember sometimes the way you think about things isn't actually the way things are.

    This morning, we had a lot that needed to get done, so we couldn't go for our walk. Luckily, I cleaned all of the sinks two days ago, but the Guinea Pig's cage had to be cleaned and more stuff around the house. Wade's parents are coming over today, so we could celebrate the holidays with them too. While he was cleaning the cage, we finished watching our rental of "The Croods: A New Age". It was sweet sitting there watching with the little one, some nice and quiet family time. Wade realized we ran out of bedding, so he went to buy some, good thing today isn't a holiday and the stores are opened.

    I hope that this afternoon's gathering does not bring any unnecessary drama, because so far our holiday has been rather calm and peaceful, I would love for it to stay that way. While also going as fast as possible!

    Although I can't wait for tonight, we are going to watch the new Wonder Woman movie.


    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: Loving my hair today, after using a new sample shampoo I got.:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    What is Mindfulness & Why Does It Matter?


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  12. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1015: 12/27/2020

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Annual Tradition.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, he gave me the trifecta and as usual, it was such a relief. Then we began watching WW:84, the new Wonder Woman movie. We went to bed, then begun hearing noise and turned around and out eldest was standing over us, which started the crap out of me. She wanted a hug, then I went to her room to speak with her about what was bothering her.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to How To Harness The Power of Your Subconscious Mind", in this episode, FarFromAverage explains how to harness the power of your subconscious mind. Remember, whatever goal you give your subconscious mind, it will work night and day to achieve.

    This morning, we went to the mall for our annual tradition - family fun day (to round out the year). We did some painting, where the girls picked their own statue and Wade shared one with me. Afterward, they went riding on bumper cars, and then for lunch, we went to Johnny Rockets. There were some triggers there and I tried my best to control myself in order to not ruin the moment. Other than the triggers, the rest of the day went well, I can never get away from triggers, they are everywhere, sigh.

    Now, we plan on finishing Disney's "Soul" with the kids and then just relax.


    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: Triggered, but hid it well.:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    HOW TO DEVELOP REAL LIFE SUPERPOWERS


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  13. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1016: 12/28/2020

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) YouTube.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, after a nice family day, even with triggers, we watched the rest of Soul and were all in a good mood. Then, when we were at my parent's place, Wade got a call from his parents and his dad kept pressing him about the Whiskey they got for him. They were going back and forth on the phone and from my side of it, it was obviously what his dad wanted or expected to hear. So, I whispered a few things to him, because he was obviously not getting it or reading the situation, then finally I said to him "just say you will drink it on New Year's" in order for them to drop the integration and show that he is indeed thankful for the gift, he instead keeps that conversation going by saying 'I might drink it on NYE'. Which of course would lead anyone to believe that after going out of their way to get him what he wanted, spending a lot more money, he doesn't even want to drink. He snapped at me for trying to help him navigate a situation he could not obviously read, AND in front of my parents, instantly undoing the years of my defending him to them aka making me look like a liar when I say he is always calm with me. At that point, I was done, meanwhile, he had the nerve to grab my hand after that (to hold it), so I gestured to him NO, not after what you just did. As if he does not know that when I am pissed off, I am in no mood for touching or anything else. After we were home, he wanted to talk, while I didn't - it would be a waste of time and only further my anger (which -spoiler alert- it did). He insisted anyway, so there we were having a conversation where he just kept repeating the same lines in a loop, causing me to repeat my responses in a loop and I hate repeating myself. While also chiming in with 'well, maybe one day after conversations you can learn how to switch off your anger and be able to just move on because we had a conversation' << a conversation where nothing was resolved on my end, so yeah lol no thanks I've held on to my pain/anger for over a decade, constantly forcing myself to 'just move on' for the sake of surviving, for his sake, for the sake of my kids, for the sake of everyone else - not doing that anymore. He claims he 'got my point' but I don't think he actually did. I told him I was done with trying to help him, he made his point clearly - that he knows what to say to his parents and doesn't need my help, so be it. If he enjoys making people feel like shit and is so obvious to that fact, well, who am I to stop him? after that conversation he said he wanted to still give me a trifecta, to help me sleep better. I said no and I told him that I could receive 100 massages and nothing would put me to sleep tonight, I was pissed off and triggered, not to mention that piled onto of the triggers (women) from earlier in the day, that I had been holding in. When I am pissed off at HIM, I don't want anything related to 'touchy-feely" or tender moments with him, I prefer distance because I interpret his attempts with 'sweet nothings'/trying to touch me in any way as though he thinks we are all good now, everything back to normal - when it is not. I was fuming.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to Wellness Wednesday: How To Live A Healthy Lifestyle", in this episode, we get some great tips on how to implement and live a healthy lifestyle. Remember, being healthy isn't a goal. It's a way of life.

    This morning, we listened to "What to Do If A Hobby is Jeopardizing Your Relationship" a Q&A, on Relationship Theory with Tom & Lisa Bilyeu. During this set, they discuss what you should do if your partner’s hobby of video games is taking over their free time and jeopardizing your relationship. They discuss why you should absolutely try to get involved and make it a joint activity, how to schedule time for each other, and what the root cause of their obsession may be. Whenever we (post-recovery) found ourselves having issues with time management, we always figured out how to move activities around in order to make it work, for both of us. Then, we began listening to "Lessons to Get Unstuck & How to Stop Numbing Yourself From Life" an interview with Victoria Arlen, on Women of Impact with Lisa Bilyeu. As a teenager, Victoria contracted a rare disease that rendered her locked into her body in a vegetative state. After years of immobility and a prognosis that looked grim, she was suddenly able to blink. From there she began the long road to regaining her mobility to even competing in the Paralympics and Dancing with the stars. Today Victoria Arlen is an actress, speaker, model, and the best-selling author of her memoir, Locked In. So far we've heard them discuss how she reacted when she realized she was locked in, how to coach yourself through hard times, are your doubters right? the difference between surrendering and giving up, and why you can't let negativity get to you. At this point, I said "I know what that feels like", he asked what I meant and I explained how the situation from last time made me feel defeated. I loathe the feeling of being perceived as a liar and last night will leave that mark in their heads and I can not stand it. There was more but I do not have the energy to get into it again.

    It's going to be a long day.

    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: Held my chin up, no matter how upset I still am.:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    HOW TO IMPLEMENT A HEALTHY LIFESTYLE


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  14. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1017: 12/29/2020

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Morning Alone Time.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, he gave me the trifecta, where we did not discuss the night before. We instead talked about our eldest's antics. Then, began watching the latest episode of 90 Day Fiancé - our little guilty pleasure. If you think your life is swirling out of control, that's definitely a show for you - you know, to take the edge off lol.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to How To Be Productive And Get More Done", in this episode, we get some really good tips on how to be more productive throughout your day so you can get more done. Remember, don't count the days, make the days count.

    This morning, my parents had a doctor's appointment, so we could not go for our walk. Instead, I spent the wee hours of the morning catching up on my own stuff. Later, the kids and I watched a few episodes of Jem! I'm happy to share my old school cartoons with them (and having them actually like 'em!). Wade brought me some noms, which I am grateful for. Because he went to bed earlier, he wakes up earlier which is always nice.

    I'm still nursing my feelings from the situation with Wade, I'm trying to move through it, but it's like a roller coaster, coming up and going down at random. Whenever it pops into my head, I get enraged all over again and that is something I can not help. I guess it is because I don't feel like it is resolved, unfortunately, I don't believe it ever will be either.

    Today I'll get a little more done for my elephant goal and also enjoy the time I have this week to catch up on some of my shows, because next week, remote learning begins again.

    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: No triggers.:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    15 Secrets To INSTANTLY Get More Done EVERY DAY!


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  15. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1018: 12/30/2020

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) YouTube.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, the trifecta was great, when he pulls my back upward, it hurts but the good kind of pain, sort of feels like my spine stretches out so much that each bone separates lol that's the best way I can describe it. I'm still a bit bitter about our incident but trying to push it down in order not to ruin NYE.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to Navigating Your Emotions During Times of Uncertainty", in this episode, Freddy Fri has a very helpful message on navigating your emotions during times of uncertainty. Remember, when nothing is sure, everything is possible.

    This morning, Wade was stuck at work and because it was freezing out, I stayed home and exercised here. I did find time to listen to "How to Put Yourself First Without Feeling Guilty" an interview with eight incredible speakers including Amy Morin, Sanja Hatter, Lilian Garcia, Natalie Ellis, Beth Manos-Brickey, Jen Cohen, Heidi Powell, and Najwa Zebian, on Women of Impact with Lisa Bilyeu. They share five key tips for you to overcome self-guilt, self-shame, self-blame, and feelings of selfishness. They discuss why you should never downplay your successes, why you have the power to choose your own journey in life, why you need to start letting shit go, how balance in life is key, and why it’s okay to desire good things for yourself. They go through each of their tips too. Tip #1 | Amy Morin shares why you should never downplay your successes, Tip #2 | Sanja Hatter & Lilian Garcia reveal why you should choose your own journey, Tip #3 | Natalie Ellis reveals why it’s you start letting shit go, Tip #4 | Beth Manos-Brickey, Jen Cohen, & Heidi Powell discuss why balance is key, and Tip #5 | Najwa Zebian shares why you need to desire good things for yourself. The best tip for me was about balance, yin, and yang, if you force something and don't give yourself room to breathe, you will ultimately burn out.

    I guess today it will be me and the girls all day, but chances are my parents will be coming over "so I won't be alone" aka just sitting and not letting me enjoy any time to myself lol.

    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: Managed to get a motivational video in.:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    Times Of Uncertainty


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
  16. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1019: 12/31/2020

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Morning Walk.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, Wade was stuck at work until late-late, which actually turned out good for us because that means he gets NYE off. Once we got home, we watched one episode of Expanse and then went to bed.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to How To Build Confidence and Overcome Self-Doubt", in this episode, Mike from Way of Kung Fu shares some great thoughts with us on how to build confidence. Remember, put all excuses aside and remember this: you are capable.

    This morning, we finished listening to "Lessons to Get Unstuck & How to Stop Numbing Yourself From Life" an interview with Victoria Arlen, on Women of Impact with Lisa Bilyeu. Victoria contracted a rare disease as a teenager that rendered her locked into her body in a vegetative state. After years of immobility and a prognosis that looked grim, she was suddenly able to blink. From there she began the long road to regaining her mobility to even competing in the Paralympics and Dancing with the stars. In conclusion, we've heard them discuss how to use others' negativity to fuel you, how to dream big, breathe, and listen to your intuition at the same time, why you can't put a timeline on your goals, the power of dreaming big, and what to do after achieving your biggest dreams. This was a good interview and after all that, she has gone through it kind of makes you relook at your own obstacles and how you view them. On the car ride back, I asked him how have things been for his recovery (triggers/urges) and then we spoke about that, my triggers, and thoughts about our future, some parts we still do not agree on and I don't know if we ever will. What he says, I want to believe so badly, but I can not bring myself around to it, because it just seems impossible given his/our history. I hope it is true, but I just don't know.

    Tonight, we will celebrate NYE together, something we didn't get to do too much, for years. I'm happy about that, but before we ring in the new year we will have a nice dinner with our girls.

    To everyone reading:
    [​IMG]

    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: Happy to be celebrating NYE with Wade.:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    How to Overcome Self-Doubt with Mindfulness


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  17. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1020: 01/01/2021

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Sleeping In.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, after having a small family dinner, we just relaxed - together. Then, it was time to start our NYE, Wade made me chocolate covered strawberries, we had wine and watched "Murder Mystery" a hilarious comedy with Jennifer Aniston and Adam Sandler. Even our eldest came out of hiding to sit with us and watch! Wade had a few hiccups, making comments that were inappropriate on two occasions. However, overall it was a good night and it was awesome being able to ring in the New Year with Wade, we missed out on years of that.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to How To Stop Making Excuses And Start Living Better", in this episode, Jocko Willink delivers an inspiring message on how to stop making excuses and start living better. Remember, you can have results or excuses, not both.

    This morning, everyone was doing their own thing, we slept in (well, not too late lol) but as I was on my computer, I played a TedTalk that Wade could hear and he liked it. The TedTalk was "Staying stuck or moving forward" Dr. Lani Nelson Zlupko. She is the founder of LNZ Consulting and an Adjunct Associate professor at the University of Pennsylvania. Lani is a solution-oriented therapist, consultant, and researcher who specializes in transition management. She resists the notion that people’s problems are rooted in personal flaws, or that standard talk therapy is sufficient for change. She believes skills can and do transform mood, behavior, relationships, and organizations. She is passionate about her work and believes that well-adjusted, confident people are the backbone of each generation. One of the best quotes I got from this talk was “where attention goes, energy grows - so focus on the solution, not the problem".

    Wade is making some yummy breakfast for us girls and we don't have any plans for the rest of today, and I like that.

    To everyone reading: welcome to 2021, best wishes for a New Year filled with love, happiness, success, and good health!
    [​IMG]


    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: In a good mood this morning.:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    DISCIPLINE EQUALS FREEDOM


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]


    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  18. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1021: 01/02/2021

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Morning Walk.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, he gave me the trifecta, lovely as always. We touched on the topic of a few days ago, the one that left me unnerved. I told him I don't really want to talk too much on my end, but he spoke from his side of it. Like I said to him before, I'm more angered about his reaction/response, especially in front of my dad than anything else. Then, we went to watch some TV, before both of us wanted to go to sleep because all of the holiday festivities got us really exhausted.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to How Mindfulness Helps To Decrease Anxiety", in this episode, Julia Kristina explains how mindfulness helps to decrease anxiety. Remember, every moment is a fresh new beginning.

    This morning, we listened to "Why Your Partner is Threatened by Your Personal Growth" a Q&A, on Relationship Theory with Tom & Lisa Bilyeu. During this set, they discuss how to handle times when your partner isn’t supporting your journey of adopting a growth-mindset and self-development. They discuss how to approach your partner when they’re simply not interested in growing, why a build-up of relationship dust may be at play, why feelings need to be honored, how to handle criticism and heckling from your partner, and why there’s power in having empathy for your partner as you grow right in front of them. It was cold out, so we didn't pause too much to talk, we wanted to get through our walk asap and get to our errand. However, we do agree with most of their points. Communication and honesty are key, always.

    Today I stepped on the scale and again, did not like what I saw, I felt it really shifted my mood but I hope that it will be another 'chill day' - without anything else depressing me.



    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: No major triggers.:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    What is Mindfulness? And How Does it Help Decrease Anxiety?


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  19. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1022: 01/03/2021

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Morning Walk.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, Wade did his best with the trifecta in order to try and help soothe the massive headache I had. It did help a little, but I'm not sure what is going on, perhaps it's a migraine because even pills didn't help much. Then we tried to watch some tv, I needed to just be in bed, so we did that.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to Facing Your Fears: How To Overcome Fear In Life", in this episode, Jordan Peterson talks with us about facing your fears and overcoming them. Remember, the fears we don't face become our limits.

    This morning, we listened to "Love Expert Shows You How to Properly Embrace Forgiveness in Your Relationship" an interview with Spirit, on Women of Impact with Lisa Bilyeu. The host of Love Goals on the OWN Network and therapist, who is simply known as Spirit, joins Lisa Bilyeu to discuss forgiveness and the process of embracing it, the power of grace in a healthy relationship, why you shouldn’t forget, but instead work through it and heal, why your best interest can differ from your relationship’s, why ego is the root cause of judgement in a relationship, why you shouldn’t be hard on yourself because of your past, why a successful you leads to a successful relationship, and she shares three things to do if your relationship is losing its ebb and flow. This was a very good interview with so many great points, especially for those in our situations (betrayal trauma/partners). My best takeaway was when she said: There's a difference between a mistake and a bad choice, that those in the wrong should know the difference when apologizing. We had a pretty good morning so far. We are ordering in some lunch and because my headache is still ongoing, I plan on just relaxing (hopefully) the rest of the day.

    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: No triggers.:emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    LOOK WHERE YOU LEAST WANT TO


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     
    Wade W. Wilson likes this.
  20. Jagliana

    Jagliana Fapstronaut

    DAY 1023: 01/04/2021

    DAILY OBJECTIVES MET:
    • My husband has been honest with me.
    • Daily talk with my husband.
    • Worked on Self-Care as defined here.
    • Currently Reading: Various
    • Current Daily Podcast: "7 Good Minutes"
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Dailies | Self-Care Completed:
    Self-care is not an indulgence. Self-care is a discipline.
    Morning routine / Verbalized my feelings
    Journal / Daily talk with hubby / Regulated my sleep.

    Tony Robbins List of Basic Human Needs | Text explanation here / Sound.
    1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty/Variety 3. Significance 4. Connection/Love 5. Growth and 6. Contribution.

    What is "TRIFECTA"?
    Back, Hand & Foot Massage.


    3 Things I am Grateful for Today:
    1) Self-care.
    2) Healing.
    3) Headache is gone.

    ---------------------------------------------------

    Last night, my headache finally broke, but something else began LOL it never ends. We began watching our guilty pleasure, but we were both tired and headed to bed. It was another rough night for me sleep-wise.

    Today on the 7 Good Minutes podcast I listened to 10 Healthy Morning Habits", in this episode, we hear them take a look at 10 healthy morning habits. Remember, our lives change when our habits change.

    This morning, Wade had an appointment and it was back to remote learning for our girls. So, we had an hour or so of 'free time' before the hustle and bustle of the day began. Later we have a dentist appointment, so our schedule is full of busywork today. Hopefully, when we get back, we'll have some time to play our game.


    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_
    For any PA's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things recovery... my husband @Wade W. Wilson, who has been in real recovery for over two years now, has created a dedicated Facebook group [click here] and Discord channel for PA's, all are welcome to join and he is looking forward to getting to know and helping each of you. You can join the channel by clicking this link: https://discord.gg/gXPuU9q
    _______________
    For SO's interested in having someone to talk to, check-in with, and a safe place to talk about all things healing and betrayal trauma... here is my Discord channel: https://discord.gg/XwhaBTg [this channel is for SO's ONLY, anyone there for malicious reasons will be removed].
    _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_

    What I liked about myself, today:
    (I am trying to find one positive thing to "like" about myself and make a mental note of it, every day. No matter how small or insignificant)
    :emoji_two_hearts: My headache finally broke, my God it was so excruciating for the last two days, with nothing in modern medicine working. :emoji_ok_hand:

    #Video
    HEALTHY HABITS: 10 daily habits that changed my life


    ---------------------------------------------------
    [​IMG]
    ---------------------------------------------------
    Recovery Setback Dates | Inconsistencies or Lies
    5/25/18 | 6/08/18 | 8/18/18 | 9/19/18 | 1/09/19
    1/19/19 | 1/21/19 | 1/24/19 | 1/27/19 | 2/08/19
    4/27/19 | 6/13/19 | 7/06/19 | 8/05/19 | 2/08/20

    ---------------------------------------------------
     

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