Journey to the Unknown

Discussion in 'Significant Other Journals' started by Kenzi, Mar 26, 2018.

  1. OMG, I am crying reading this....i am so glad that, after the thousands of days and hours and hugs and tears, you are going to dig in and fight for the best in what you can both be. '
    You just amaze the F outta me. You have insights that blow my mind, I learn so much just reading the multi-layered wisdom in your thoughts.

    For everyone's views of what love is, all that romantic, easy-going, soft mushy squishy feeling stuff --- that is good, BUT this ---- THIS right here---- fighting for each other and fighting to be heard and relevant and real and together to each other and yourselves ---- THIS IS TRUE LOVE. Not the "Princess Bride" version, but the real-life, in-your-face, we-both-matter-dammit version of what staying together and growing in love means in this day and age. It is hard work, and wonderful, and scary, and necessary all at once.

    It is too easy to walk.
    It takes knowing what is important to stay.

    What better thing to go into a battle for than this.....LOVE.

    Love ya, baby girl.
     
  2. Kenzi

    Kenzi Fapstronaut

  3. Strength And Light

    Strength And Light Fapstronaut

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    I am grateful that you've made a concrete decision. I know this hasn't been and still isn't easy or pleasurable for you.

    Please don't give up on working on your own trauma. You've mentioned that you had a less than ideal upbringing and an abusive relationship prior to RS. Working to resolve that trauma can only be helpful for yourself and your marriage. You deserve to feel good about yourself and about your life. Whatever has taken place in your past (including your recent and long ago past) that has traumatized, disturbed, and distorted your inner beliefs can be resolved. Traumatic events cannot be undone, but the way they influence us currently and continue to effect us can be resolved. I think for right now it might make you feel a little bit more safe to hang onto resentment and anger, because those feelings give the illusion of empowerment - they cover up our vulnerabilities. When you've been hurt, it's only natural to want to protect yourself where you've been hurt. But anger and resentment really only poison your own well-being.

    I don't want to ask you to drop your guard and put yourself at serious risk of being crushed. But I do want to ask you to please not "settle" because it's easier or less uncomfortable initially. I'm not talking about your decision to stay with RS. I'm talking about your trauma. You aren't done growing and healing and living and thriving and dreaming and doing and inspiring and being inspired. You aren't old and you aren't damaged beyond repair. You are CatwomanBeyonceEllenOprahCyndiFuckingLauperObama or whatever it was that @Jamie_K_ said.

    Keep making strides FOR YOU. Inspire yourself and RS will see how it's done. I believe in you. We believe in you. Just want to be sure that you believe in you.

    I hope this doesn't come off as condescending or judgmental. I love the person that you are, and when I say to keep working on yourself I don't mean to infer that there's anything wrong with you. I'm actually saying there's NOT anything wrong with you! So if you feel beat up and old and damaged and tired and angry and fragile or vengeful, things can get much much better. That's what I mean by don't settle for how you feel now. You can improve on how you feel inside without a single action or inaction from RS.

    Love to you from all the goons here who adore you. :)
     
  4. P E R F EC T choice...the music, your man, your family, your path.
    You keep messing up my make-up...crying again! XOXO
     
    Strength And Light likes this.
  5. ItsNeverTooLate

    ItsNeverTooLate Fapstronaut

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    :emoji_clap::emoji_clap::emoji_clap::emoji_clap:

    Team work and communication. It’s easy to say “I love you”. It takes effort to actually prove it. Thank you for this JK!
     
  6. LOL
    Love this. Ha ha :emoji_grinning:
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  7. BetrayedMermaid

    BetrayedMermaid Fapstronaut

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    You are so strong Kenzi. RockStar is so lucky you love him!
     
  8. Queenie%Bee

    Queenie%Bee Fapstronaut

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    I’ve been researching the same . Fetish . Libido . Men’s health .
    We’ve tried Maca root , it actually helped the libido . Also trying the “ scheduled initiation of sexual intimacy “
    The feeling of not being desired especially as an SO that was betrayed that actually WANTS sex with the very person that fucked them over can 100% cause us to feel unloved , unwanted , not enough etc . But it’s not just about the PIV , sure that helps things but the FEELING of being desired actually makes us feel safe AND sexy ! Xoxo xoxo
     
  9. Strength And Light

    Strength And Light Fapstronaut

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    Well....was that it? Kenzi said she was going to leave soon and that she'd post a song as her last post. She made her decision to stay with RS and her last post was a song.

    Not sure what we do now? I suppose I'll help fold up chairs if someone wants to sweep and mop. We can roll up the Kenzi For President banners and store them in a closet in case she ever returns. Sorry for whoever volunteers to sweep - I've made a hell of a mess with this popcorn.
     

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