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Just joined, fed up with my current situation.

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by theVoidster, Nov 26, 2016.

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  1. theVoidster

    theVoidster Fapstronaut

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    Really glad this is here. I think my situation has become worse over the years without realizing it. What's more ridiculous is that I'm a good guy, like I'd imagine everybody on here, but finding myself being corrupted by porn and masturbation, it's crazy,I never thought this would ever happen to me. Been single for ages and I honestly think my whole psychology has been a factor, it's time to change and get back to what I used to be like...normal.
     
    D . J . and Frühlingstimme like this.
  2. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    theVoidster, welcome to NoFap! You are amongst friends who are here to encourage you and not judge you.
     
  3. theVoidster

    theVoidster Fapstronaut

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    Thanks man, appreciate that. First day out the way, feels good, It's certainly gonna be tough, but I'm committed to it 100%.
     
    D . J . likes this.
  4. Vivek b

    Vivek b Fapstronaut

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    Welcome bro!!

    I am new here too. Just like most newbies here, I too am frustrated about my addiction to porn and masturbation. I am so happy I found this community. Lets get back to normal and be awesome once again..

    Cheers
     
    D . J . likes this.
  5. theVoidster

    theVoidster Fapstronaut

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    No worries man, this is where you change your life, I know it's possible, just gotta stay focused.
     
    D . J . and Vivek b like this.
  6. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

  7. theVoidster

    theVoidster Fapstronaut

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    That's a tricky one. To be honest, mentally I just block it out, think of something else. I've been meditating on and off for years so that's something I'm going to try again. I think it's teaching the brain and watching your own reactions to things. Like for example you might be watching a film, see a sex scene or particular actress or whatever and think next stop..porn! I mean why not right? But that's the thing, at the time it seems harmless, but over time it clearly has a negative affect, so I'm trying to disassociate these moments with masturbation, I'm basically trying to shut it down, it's not easy, this morning I woke up with an erection and I was like 'jesus man, go away, it's my first day for f#*k sake'.
     
    D . J . likes this.
  8. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    Here is a growing collection of startup strategies compiled from myself and I've added some from others on NoFap. Keep these in mind. This is by no means a be-all-end-all list of suggestions but it is a list for you to use and add to for yourself and modify to meet your needs.
    1. Delete all of the P that you have from your computer and smartphone including the browser history and cookies. This will not stop you but will slow you down.
    2. Identify your triggers. What are the things that you happening in your world to cause you to turn to PMO for escape and comfort! This is the most crucial step in the process.
    3. Once your triggers are identified, determine healthy ways of dealing with those triggers such as exercise, running, leaving the stressful situation and going outside for air.
    4. Follow this link to find out what NoFap is about. Within this link is a link to a glossary of terms commonly used on NoFap. This will help you communicate knowledgeably and more effectively. https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/newbies-list-of-rebooting-resources.50878/
    5. Go to http://yourbrainonporn.com/ to learn more about the effect PMO has on you. Do this also to educate yourself on the damage you are doing to yourself.
    6. Guard your eyes. Be careful of what you allow yourself to see. No, you cannot live with your eyes closed but you can determine how long you look at something. If you know it may cause you to fall, flee from it! Run in the other direction, sometimes that need to be literal.
    7. Masturbation... do not keep your hands to yourself. Unless you are bathing, changing your underwear or actually using the bathroom, your hands should be nowhere near your penis. YOU ARE BANNED FROM TOUCHING YOUR PENIS FOR RECREATION!!! IT IS NOT A TOY!!!
    8. Your bed is limited to only the time you are sleeping. No laying in bed other than that. As soon you awake, you should get out of bed. Can't sleep, if awake for more than a few minutes, get out of bed until you are sleepy enough to go to sleep.
    9. Keep doors open unless necessary. You need to be isolated as little as possible. You're less likely to M when people can see you.
    10. Keep curtains and blinds open as much as possible. Similar reason as above and also allows light inside. Many time M'ing is more likely in dark places.
    11. At night, keep lights on as often as possible. Similar to above, lights on may lessen your desire to fap.
    12. If you are a naked sleeper or a boxer sleeper, consider sleeping in a in jockstrap, cup or briefs or compression shorts, something more constrictive so that you are less likely to feel movement while falling asleep or when awaking. They may provide a better barrier to prevent those that subconsciously reach for their penis at night or in the morning. They may also be a visual barrier for those that have morning erections too irresistible to not touch.
    13. Begin a journal so that others can encourage you and connect with you.
    14. Become active in this community. The more active you are, the less time you will spend focused on you. The less time focused solely on you, the faster time goes. There is an old saying, "a watched pot of water doesn't boil any faster", which means for this example, focusing solely on yourself and your issues won't make them go away sooner. It's OK to track progress but when spending more time doing other things that were once important to you and encouraging others, you will notice the time of your sobriety will go so much faster than if you didn't.
    This a journey. Unless you began your addiction yesterday, don't expect to have complete victory by tomorrow. It takes time. We are here for you for as long as it takes.
     
    Vivek b and theVoidster like this.
  9. theVoidster

    theVoidster Fapstronaut

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    That's a solid list. Very helpful. Luckily I do exercise, getting back into that heavily now, it's all connected to the renewal. Yeah, it's gonna be hard, but that's why I'm here, being in this community makes it a hell of lot easier to deal with.
     
  10. Vivek b

    Vivek b Fapstronaut

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    Hi D.J.

    Thanks for the guide. Like you said, I have already deleted all the P I had on the first day itself. Its my 5th day today. So far, it has been very difficult. I try to spend as much time outside as possible.

    It is difficult but I will do it now.
     
  11. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    Realize where you are most vulnerable and avoid those situations as much as possible and when they can't be avoided (like using the computer) only allow yourself to be in those situations for short amounts of time, meaning take several breaks away from the situation.
     
    Vivek b likes this.

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