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Karezza - Help Me Understand

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by Rev2.0, Jun 6, 2020.

  1. Rev2.0

    Rev2.0 Fapstronaut

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    I see a lot about this on certain NoFap threads but am posting on this one as it seems to be most equally visited by men and women. I'm sure there are FAQ posted on the web but I'd like to hear from personal experiences.

    POSSIBLE TRIGGERS as I will be using some graphic language following:

    - I understand karezza to be a practice where the man has orgasm with a partner but doesn't ejaculate in or on her. Aside from the fact I don't know how this is physically possible, it sounds like a great recipe for blue balls. How is it that doesn't happen?

    - Do women practice karezza too? They don't ejaculate (unless you count squirting) so how is karezza for them any different than normal sex?

    - Women: does it not seem less masculine of your partner when he doesn't "finish" in the ejaculatory sense?

    - Men: Does the fact you're not "blowing loads" make you feel less masculine? Or is that just porn created conditioning?

    - If no ejaculation, then can karezza be practiced as a form of birth control? Or is it still advised to use protection?

    I'll be honest, the idea of never ejaculating except to procreate sounds almost inconceivable. Yet I hear from couples that it's the greatest thing ever. So i figure it's worth at least investigating. Thanks in advance.
     
  2. Psalm27:1my light

    Psalm27:1my light Fapstronaut

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    You don’t orgasm. You just enjoy without o.
     
  3. Psalm27:1my light

    Psalm27:1my light Fapstronaut

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    Also, not ejaculating will not keep a woman from getting pregnant. You have pre-cum with loads of sperm!
     
  4. Rev2.0

    Rev2.0 Fapstronaut

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    Oh so you don't even O? Ok then I had it pegged completely wrong. I thought it was an extension of semen retention cuz I see it discussed a lot on that board too.

    Respect for everyone who does it and likes it... but I definitely won't be going that route. To me the O is the fun part... for me and her... and where the bonding happens.
     
  5. Psalm27:1my light

    Psalm27:1my light Fapstronaut

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    While I mostly agree, Karezza definitely helps with people who are sex addicts. You’ve abused your brain and bodies, that dopamine that you get having sex and orgasm makes it harder to not go back to pmo in the beginning. So, my husband asked for a hard reboot at 4 months clean because he was really struggling. No sex, ugh. That sucks. We made it 52 days, had sex then 50 days. That break from any sexual stimuli helped him. After that time we did Karezza as it allowed us sex just no o. Turns out it’s pretty fun and a good bonding without “ worrying or racing” towards o. Now? He’s over a year clean, we have normal sex and sometimes Karezza just depends. If you want to kick this addiction, you have to learn not to be dependent on the dopamine you get from orgasms. That chaser after sex is the downfall of many pmo addicts.
     
    JamesTheSquirrel likes this.
  6. I've practiced karezza multiple times with my wife during the recovery process. I used to think that the most important part of sex was O but I've reassessed my opinion on that. If you make sex all about the O then eventually it just becomes selfish pleasure rather than shared intimacy. This is particularly true for a recovering addict.

    We don't do karezza everytime, but I find when I O often I start to lose sensitivity and revert back to 'using' my wife. Sometimes I find myself getting very frustrated afterwards but most of the time I actually feel a sense of satisfaction. It makes me feel close to my wife and keeps my level of desire high.

    Try it sometime you might actually like it!
     

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