Keep relapsing pathetically..

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by DbzSaiyajin, Jul 8, 2018.

  1. DbzSaiyajin

    DbzSaiyajin Fapstronaut

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    Its difficult for me to abstain to pmo. During the day am OK with work , activities etc . its at night that these thoughts , fantasies and urges come to my mind. And it eventually leads me to search for pornstars pictures which then leads me to pmo.

    Though its not every nights that this happen to me I don't like it. I don't want to be pathetic like this. I really want to stop pmo once for all. I want to be strong and be able to control myself. I feel down whenever I relapse but still I keep trying , doing my best .
     
  2. wtbootb

    wtbootb Fapstronaut

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    What causes your relapse? Are you sad, lonely, depressed or angry? Try to work on that first.
     
  3. helpfuldude

    helpfuldude Fapstronaut

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    You can set a rule for yourself: don't use computer or smartphone in your home.
     
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  4. DbzSaiyajin

    DbzSaiyajin Fapstronaut

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    I'm lonely ..
     
  5. DbzSaiyajin

    DbzSaiyajin Fapstronaut

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    thanks... I'll try to do that
     
  6. Its just you who allows such thoughts to enter in your brain. It's your brain that carries on further and detailed proceedings on such thoughts. Its you who allows your brain to do so..
    You just have to take that permission back from your brain, as soon as any such thought appears in your mind, just remember that you've to get rid of that thought within 3 seconds of its appearance otherwise you'll keep relapsing pathetically.
     
    Asgardian36 likes this.
  7. Arnuld

    Arnuld Fapstronaut

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    First of all you are not pathetic. You are a guy with an addiction. And you are admitting that you are having a problem that you cannot seem to overcome on your own. Welcome to step one of recovery. If loneliness is your number one trigger leave your home and go be with people. If you have social anxiety you don’t have to interact just sit there. If you don’t currently exercise go join a gym. Or workout in another public place.

    I know it’s hard to not beat yourself up when you relapse. I’ve been there more times than I care to count. That’s your brain telling you that you are bad. You are not bad! The P is bad and the effect it’s having on your life is bad. But you are not bad, or pathetic, or any other lie the addiction is causing you to believe so that you will stay in the addiction.
     
  8. Bijuu107

    Bijuu107 Fapstronaut

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    Relapsing ever again can get a routine. Make yourself clear why you are doing this and analyze everything what you know and also from your good streaks.
    You need a plan when the thoughts come. For example going out and walk when they come. Better going out before sleep as fapping before sleep right?
    About the loneliness just try to get contacts and to overcome this feeling. The try count. One thing you will need for sure. Patience.
    Just know that things don,t happen instantly how you want them. It will need time. As long as it is like this you will have to hold on or accepting it. You should not focus on this thought and just beeing sad.

    Good luck
     
    Dizzy Lotus likes this.
  9. I relaspe every time too!
    Only way is to pray!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    This can't be a private battle
     
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  10. TheManDude

    TheManDude Fapstronaut

    Words of wisdom, sounds cliche but the first step is to acknowlege the problem, analize it's roots (triggers, bad habits, etc) and then work each one of them as you can... it's not easy but if you can keep in your mind how bad it's porn for you it becomes a habit to avoid it. Keep going and don't let a restart to bring you down, I know you can do it.
     
    Dizzy Lotus likes this.
  11. Dr.Shilo

    Dr.Shilo Fapstronaut

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    I'm the same way. It's those late hours in the night and/or early hours in the morning that are the hardest because you have nothing to do and your mind can wander.

    Something that's helped me is to maintain a rigid sleep schedule. In bed by 10:30 and up by 6:30 (or something like that). Another thing is to make a rule for when you can use your phone at night. There are some software companies like K9 where you can lock your internet after a certain time. Also try to listen to wholesome music until you fall asleep. If you're religious then prayer and scripture study helps to divert attention. Even if you're not religious you can still give this a try. These have all helped me in the past.
     
    Dizzy Lotus likes this.
  12. MasterRoshi

    MasterRoshi Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for sharing. The fact the urge comes at night (or often in the morning) seems to be common. This is when the world is quiet and we’re alone and left with the “demons” in our head. These moments are when we face the true bullshiz that’s the real issue. I’ve found PMO is my medication to deal with all the stuff in my head I can’t face. And this is why it’s so loud at night, when there’s no distractions.

    There is hope, I say it’s really about self honesty. If you take a hard look at yourself and decide what you truly need to do, and then do it, there’s hope. For me I needed to go to therapy to deal with my depression and anxiety. Others need to get rid of their smart phone or go on a spiritual retreat. Whatever you need to do, do it! I believe There’s no hope staying sober if we continue to lie to ourselves and others, and keep our internal pain a secret.

    So you writing on here is a big step in the process! Continue to reach out to people on here and in real life. hang in there!
     
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  13. nef

    nef Fapstronaut

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    try to do something late night so that you feel so sleepy that your brain automatically says not today i won't recommend this this but for your problem start late night online gaming but not too long okay
     
  14. Dizzy Lotus

    Dizzy Lotus Fapstronaut

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    You say you won't recommend it, and then you do it anyway?
    Edit: Emoji aren't supported here, I don't think I knew.
     
  15. nef

    nef Fapstronaut

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    for me it is like countering one bad habit with another but less bad and less effect but still bad at least it helps in urges
     
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