Keep watching Gay Porn eventhough I don't get aroused.

Discussion in 'Problematic Sexual Behavior' started by Marcuston, Jun 3, 2018.

  1. Marcuston

    Marcuston Fapstronaut

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    Hey, um....I have a problem, you see I always considered myself to be a straight male, but a few days ago I wondered if I was gay, so I watched gay porn, it didn't really arouse me, I only had a small to medium erection, then I compared it to straight or lesbian porn and I got rock hard, I went back to gay porn and my penis went soft. The problem is that my brain keeps wanting me to go back so I can test myself, it's always like "Maybe you didn't see the guy suck dick for a long time, go test again" or "You didn't see everything in that gay video, go test again", it's so frustrating because I barely get an erection over it, and I don't really get aroused, but my brain still wants me to check to be sure. Please help.
     
    Last edited: Jun 3, 2018
  2. Immature

    Immature Fapstronaut

    Headspace likes this.
  3. Marcuston

    Marcuston Fapstronaut

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  4. Immature

    Immature Fapstronaut

    It is an obsession with the thought/fear that you might be gay.
     
  5. Marcuston

    Marcuston Fapstronaut

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    Thanks, I am not really getting any erections anymore, although the ones I used to get were small. I guess it's sll the stress and anxiety like you said.
     
  6. treetop

    treetop Fapstronaut

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    Getting an erection or a medium one with gay porn doesn't make you gay. You should talk with someone you trust about your sexuality. If your goal is to avoid porn then gay, straight, bi, trans, whatever porn is porn so keep away. Your sexual identity is for you to explore in other health ways. The HOCD stuff is an interesting read.
     
    Hitto, Headspace and Immature like this.
  7. Headspace

    Headspace Fapstronaut

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    Just quit porn altogether, and you won't have this kind of problems anymore. It sounds like a mild form (or a beginning) HOCD to me as well. Click the link in my signature if you like.
     
    the phantom pain likes this.
  8. AtomicTango

    AtomicTango Fapstronaut

    This kind of thing is quite common, I tend to think of it as similar to watching a car crash or something along those lines; you want to look away, but your brain compels you to keep watching even though rationally it makes little sense. All that is happening here is your brain is being attracted to the novelty, not the actual content.

    The best solution is to quit porn before things get out of hand.
     
  9. Marcuston

    Marcuston Fapstronaut

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    The thing is I am only slightly aroused by gay porn and it's not really because of the men, it's because of the moves and stuff, and straight and lesbian makes me way more harder....but even if it's slight, why do I get an erection over it.
     
  10. Marcuston

    Marcuston Fapstronaut

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    I have got new news, within the first 3 mins my penis gets at a medium erection, then after 3 mins I quickly lose my libido, this is completely different from straight or lesbian, do you know why?
     
  11. Marcuston

    Marcuston Fapstronaut

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    More news, when I looked images for gay porn, I only got aroused a bit, but when i actually tapped on the image to get a closer look I lost my small - medium erection immediately.
     
  12. Headspace

    Headspace Fapstronaut

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    That's good, but you are still trying to measure your "gayness" by the strength of your erection when looking at gay porn. Firstly, it isn't that linear. Seconly - more importantly - porn is not a good indicator if you really want to learn about yourself. It probably created your sexual confusion in the first place. Porn can create new fetishes. To determine your sexual orientation, do not watch porn but rather observe how you feel about people in real life. Any guys you feel sexually attracted to? Can you imagine being in a relationship with that dude?

    May be you "confirmed" for now that you are not gay. Congratulations, but how do you know you will remain convinced? In a month or two the same doubts might arise again, and you will do the same confirmation ritual again, until this becomes an obsession of its own. So, even though I repeat myself: Just quit porn. HOCD is like cancer, it tends to return, but other than cancer, quitting porn is a reliable cure if it hasn't messed too much with you already. (Moreover, do not use online dating sites to meet guys - if you feel you need to do it, go somewhere where you can get to know people in person.)
     
    WreckTangle and Tiger uppercut! like this.
  13. Marcuston

    Marcuston Fapstronaut

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    Thx man
     
  14. I too get very hard looking at gay videos......it distresses me
     
  15. Marcuston

    Marcuston Fapstronaut

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    But do you like men in real life?
     
  16. I have guy friends. Not attracted sexually to them. Occasionally I see a guy that arouses me. It's mostly porn that excites me.
     
  17. Marcuston

    Marcuston Fapstronaut

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    It depends really, I only get slightly aroused by gay porn, but never in real life.
    Real life determines your sexuality.
     
  18. Been quite a while but I've crossed the line in real life too. I liked it but couldn't do it as a lifestyle choice. I'm married
     
  19. Marcuston

    Marcuston Fapstronaut

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    Do think straight and lesbian porn is better than gay porn or vice versa.
     
  20. Don't know if either is better or worse. I just found gay more exciting and got hooked.
     

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