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Knock Knock anyone there

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by Covert, Jan 3, 2017.

  1. Covert

    Covert Fapstronaut

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    When I came to know about NoFap I came here just to get rid of porn, then after signing up I see that this is really broader than porn and its really good to know that these fantastic members of NoFap can help you and stand by you in other problems also. Keeping this in mind I am opening myself or discussing to you my other problem, my initial problem that I have written is mentioned here (https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/stucked-and-confused-help-needed.85109/).

    I am a person who suffers from Indecision, Fickle mindness and Confusion and these problems are destroying myself. In many aspects have seen that I get struck or getconfused to take a decision. My career is ZERO and this aspect of myself played a huge part and (ANXIETY & FEAR) also serves a purpose for me but the ANXIETY part I am trying to resolve and its showing result. But inability to take a decision is really getting me down sometimes heavily, I don't know the range of my problem regarding my Indecsion problem but I want to resole it simultaneously.

    Another part FICKLE mind and easily gets CONFUSED plays a pivotal part. Till this point I am not clear what to do with my life in a clear way. I really want to get out of these but don't know where or how to start. The thought that a person of my age just can't get straight about something is really frustating.

    Any help regarding these is very much appreciated.
     
    Tiny antelope and D . J . like this.
  2. Sailor93

    Sailor93 Fapstronaut

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    I can start giving general advice on taking action, but maybe its more interesting if you tell us something about your study, hobbies, sports and interests, dreams. In this way people can give more to the point advice.
     
    Tiny antelope and Covert like this.
  3. Covert

    Covert Fapstronaut

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    1st of all thanks for viewing my post and replying.

    I have completed my studies and then tried different exams for a significant time (5 years ago), but I was never true to myself so it payed me. Then suddenly I got the anxiety issue in s strange incident happened to me. Once I returned from an invitation of my freinds marriage then suddenly I had to go hospital emergency unit as my detoriated due to gas or acidity formation whatever you tell, after that I seriously got the anxiety and fear issue. I also had prescribed medication but it worked for a certain time. After that incident my confidence gone down to zero due to fear and anxiety issue. Then I am not telling that beforehand I was a very strong character and was very focussed on my career, my results were not good and I lived a sedentry lifestyle. This way everything went downwards and here I am to ZERO, but I want to get out of this but don't know where or how to start . I can write down many things but I want to keep it short.

    I completed my studies in COMMERCE stream, my hobbies watching MOVIES mainly and listening to some songs, Sports that I follow are UFC, TENNIS & CRICKET mainly. As for dreams I don't know because that seems to vast for me but I want to start something that maybe small but I have to start thats it.I dropping the link to my another post maybe that can help too
    (https://www.NoFap.com/forum/index.php?threads/stucked-and-confused-help-needed.85109/). So thats it basically I am struck thats due to myself I realise but how to break it I don't know.
     
    Tiny antelope and D . J . like this.
  4. Kennen

    Kennen Fapstronaut

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    Are you employed?
     
    Tiny antelope likes this.
  5. Covert

    Covert Fapstronaut

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    Nope
     
    Tiny antelope likes this.
  6. Kennen

    Kennen Fapstronaut

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    I was recently trained, Life skills training, last December.. We were instructed to list down what's our purpose in life...

    It will somehow help us reflect, for us to have confidence and beat anxiety..

    What's your purpose?
     
    Tiny antelope likes this.
  7. Covert

    Covert Fapstronaut

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    Now like to earn money
     
    Tiny antelope likes this.
  8. Sailor93

    Sailor93 Fapstronaut

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    Like many of us, you can start seeing NoFap as the start of your journey. A huge part of the succes of many nofappers is the fact that they also start changing other parts of their lives. Habits, hobbies, sports. As I can see it now, you are sitting in a nice little comfort zone. Watching movies, watching sports, watching porn, nobody to judge you, nobody to mock you, nobody you have to take into account. It's time you step out of that comfort zone, and into the real world! Try to step over this anxiety. I see you like tennis and cricket. Ever fancied playing it rather than watchinf it. These are great sports, social, because you play together or in a team. Maybe you have any experience in it, maybe you don't, join a beginners course. You won't be the only noob therethere, plenty of people who are new to it. But just don't expect to beat Roger Federer after 5 days of practice! Every hobby takes time and practise, every hobby. When I started becoming better at training and playing guitar, I started to appreciate the time that it took to improve. When you start to realise that you actually have this time on your hand, you start loving your hobbies. I know people of 80 yo who still play tennis. I dont know how old you are, but for me that would be 57 years that I can practice before I turn 80! Society today focuses only on short term gains. Marrying is stupid, one night stands are awesome, you read your news in a 60 seconds clip because you don't want to read a big article in the newspaper. 40 lifehacks that make your life awesome/efficient/better. People are scared that they will not get instant satisfaction these days. Fight against that. Make long term investments in every part of life. And Nofap is your first long term investment. It looks like you don't see much people. Things like sports or other hobbies can change that. Start with these, the rest will come. I cant give you advise on the job seeking part, but this can come later. Stop seeing watching movies as a hobby. Its something to relax, which can for sure be part of your every day life. Everybody needs time to relax.

    So get out of your comfort zone, fight against that anxiety. The first day in a new club, group wont be nice, but thats for everybody the same. Even if some people pretend they are comfortable, its usually a false facade. Go for the long term investment!

    Or as Gandalf would say it: the world is not in your books and maps Bilbo. The world is out there!!!
     
    kaylee time, Tiny antelope and Covert like this.
  9. Covert

    Covert Fapstronaut

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    Thanks man for this nice reply. I meet people, sometimes also hang out with friends regularly its not true that I confine myself into four walls but yes its true that even if I am hanging myself with friends or persons I don't enjoy fully bcoz deep down in me it stings that I am 29 years of age and I am completely ZERO. The thing is that I need to break down the fear that during this period I have been a failure that means if I want to start something new this time also I will be a failure. On the anxiety part I have been working and I seem to get little results. The things is that I want to recognize or create myself a point from where I want to start my journey. But your thoughts regarding short term & long term aspect was really helpful. I started a exercise regime its not to heavy but a brisk morning walk, I skip it sometimes but I try to continue to it for everyday as far as possible. This is way how things are going on my part but thanks again man for taking the time to read about my problem.
     
    Tiny antelope, D . J . and Sailor93 like this.
  10. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    Take one issue at a time. Write down what you want, write down what you can do, and begin, one step at a time creating a plan to reach your career goal.
     
  11. Covert

    Covert Fapstronaut

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    Thanks
     
    Tiny antelope and D . J . like this.

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