Lack of motivation

A week to ten days is my usual relapse period, just finished a week and intending to get through this weekend.. As for what is motivating me, frankly it's a total disgust with how much my PMO has taken over my life (to the detriment) and that is what I think of every time I feel any temptation.

 

That was my biggest issue in the past, I just couldn't fine a good reason to keep abstaining from porn and especially masturbation (In my case I can easily live without porn, but masturbation....).
Before I started this streak I have found my reasons!
Here is a report from my journal when I had a really really strong urge and was so close to relapse.

Day 4 - I have to be honest and say I was really close to relapsing a couple of hours ago. But not with the porn, I rarely crave porn.
Reasons I did not relapse:
1 - This thread. I know it would feel terrible to write here and say that I have relapsed, so I would rather avoid that sense of shame. Although we shouldn't feel shameful because we relapsed, at least we are doing our best and trying! It just that every single relapse makes you feel like crap.
2 - I am reading "You are not your brain" for the past couple of months (reading it many times) and trying to apply everything from it. It's a great book btw, and I highly recommend it. So I have applied "The Four Steps" method from that book. It is kinda difficult to explain it so you have to actually read the entire book.
But Step 3 is about Refocusing your attention of something else rather than your strong urges and thoughts, and I did just that. I used "word search" to refocus my attention and it worked great! I have used this website, so try it if you want http://word-search-puzzles.appspot.com/ 15 minutes later, I have completed one puzzle and I my cravings reduced from 10 to 7. I did one more any my craving was pretty much gone. Had a wonderful morning!! No sense of shame!
3 - My main reason for doing this is to work with my emotions and if I use masturbation to avoid feeling any "difficult" emotions than I am simply wasting my time. Being 100 Days free from PMO doesn't mean much to me, unless I learn to work with my emotions skilfully. I do not want to hide from them anymore.

Well, I have more reasons for not relapsing, but those 3 played a massive role.



As for the thread, I was talking about this 7 Days Challenge

Anyway, you won't get far until you have a really strong personal reasons for doing this.