last chance saloon

Discussion in 'Rebooting in a Relationship' started by Recovering PA, Mar 24, 2018.

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  1. Recovering PA

    Recovering PA Fapstronaut

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    Hi,

    Im about to loose my SO as she is planning to move out because of my addiction. I feel that through stopping PMO and trying to talk to her, taking all the verbal abuse and not trying to justify it i was committing to us. I have even said that i will not influence her decision because its not fair as she also battles an addiction and she needs to look after herself.

    I have been talking to her through the day and tonight she is looking to move out as "i have not faught for her". I have been thrown by this. I listened not buried my head in the sand and been upfront and owned my mistakes, i thought i was doing a good job.

    Please help me see what she is going through and save our relationship. I don't know how to do it on my own. The internet is a large and confusing place.

    Thank you
     
  2. Citadelle

    Citadelle Fapstronaut

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    Dobrý deň, myslím she needs to know at the most, that you really love her . That your addiction is not about her. That in any case is not her mistake. I also think that she needs to Acts of Sorry. To see that you are really not try, but do everything what is possible to "heal " addiction .To be with her. Do it for yourself, for herself and you both. I m sure that she is feeling insecure and broken now, also helpless. I think that in one minute she woulf like to hug you, then slap you in face, then scream, then cry, stay, run away... I dont know how its for men, but for woman, ok for lots of women its like cheating. She needs a time to deal with the new facts about you, but also "seeing" that you are fighting for her.
    tiež even if my boyfriend end our relationship ,stories at nofap helps me a lot .
    I wish you a power and bravery for all.
     
  3. Recovering PA

    Recovering PA Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for your kind words. She in the last hour only minutes after writing my post decided that we are not staying together, 3 years down the drain :-( really want to act out and fap now I'm all alone officially. I never wanted this, I'm to blame and I hate myself for it!.
     
  4. Citadelle

    Citadelle Fapstronaut

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    Really sorry to hear it:( but I still think, she needs a time now, little space to realize it, thinking about it, for every woman is just a big shock as first. Three years are not two days or something, there is still a chance and options that love will stronger in her, for you both and I guess while is this possibility, keep fighting. Unfortunately sometimes part of keep fighting for love and better relationship means also let them go ..Nd I think if they are not come back..its will be not worling if they stayed.. Breathe and PLEASE just dont go watch P, if its possible,I mean coz stress and pain of this, dont give up it. As first just breathe .Its will be ok.
     
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  5. Recovering PA

    Recovering PA Fapstronaut

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    She has been looking for help on NoFap since I stopped, been clean for 60 something days, it's on my counter but for what it's all been for nothing, she's packing now n throwing abuse at me. I made this but as a single person I don't hurt anyone else. I never want to do this to anyone ever again. I never thought I'd get a relationship as a child because of my physical disability and I've had 2 majorly dysfunctional ones and this one the 2nd I did. I'm not going to ruin anyone else's life. I'll b alone forever :-(. Thank you for helping, I asked a little too late. Sorry I wasted your time, looks like I'm a lost cause. Good luck on your journey
     
  6. Citadelle

    Citadelle Fapstronaut

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    This one..its not thr same but I m serious ill and in reality can die every day or night (but everyone)and I m pushed him away many times for that and pushed my friends ..coz I dont wanna hurt anyone..but I think , how people should learn how to let go belovrd people, also to allow thrm to stay . I mean, maybe you see yourself now like oiece of shit,which is hurt everyone, beloved and doing nothing else.But man, 60 days ! And I m pretty sure that you have a plenty of good character stuff. Also before, like Igot sick, I was almost all life lived in the imagine from my childhood " that noone can love me never" . She eas with you for three years for something . And thats still there under surface. I started reading one book last days, " The healing wounded relationship "by Padovani. He is a catholic priest, but man this is a serious one of the best book what I ever read and I was working in bookshopp;) Maybe you should try it. I know its hard, but stay on your way.time.
     
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