Last straw

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by humanfirst, Dec 12, 2018.

  1. humanfirst

    humanfirst Fapstronaut

    Hello everyone,I'm an 18-year-old still in high school and I feel like introducing myself, or at least (to some extent) engaging with this recently discovered site.Perhaps it'll speed up my recovery process,who knows?
    Since this week began,I've gone on an actual journey.This time I'm serious about quitting PMO.I've been trying to unsuccessfully free myself long long before I discovered the community here.My personal record is well below 20,not sure if I even managed to reach two full weeks.Doesn't matter,I kept trying whenever I "woke up" from my addiction, if you know what I mean.
    Last week was so devastating I thought I was destroying my properly structured life.Since masturbating to porn became so frequent I watched it less and less regularly.. BUT sought another means of pleasure.Like a complete idiot not having anything else to do with his time.And here I was,creating an account in a "dating" site which emphasised on sexuality and nudity.Suddenly three whole days went in the trash,without exaggeration.The good inside me was fighting a seemingly lost battle,a long lost cause.Thankfully it won.It won on Sunday afternoon.I deleted my account,promised myself to never ever come close to visiting such sites, and decided to quit wasting my time in general,not just through porn.
    A few hours later and I'm OBSESSED with the topic of self-improvement.Only three days have passed and I already believe I've commited myself to one of my decisions ever made.I'd rather not get into much detail as to what I'm doing specifically,but key words are discipline and productivity.Not the ones you eventually get exhausted from.I won't lie I'm a bit tired,but I know it's because I'm spending 99% of my time the way I want to and the way I've been positively influenced to.
    Part of my journey is once and for quitting the world of pornography.It won't be easy.Now it's all rainbows and smiles,but I know it'll eventually get tough,maybe even unbearable.Thankfully I always learn from my mistakes and now I'm using them to my advantage - in combination with the new inspiration I feed my brain on.
    I won't post regularly as I don't really have that time (today I'm making a huuuge exception).Let's say every seven days,or every weekend,since my weekends are generally much less occupying.Wish me luck! I'm overwhelmed with the amount of posts and records shared here..I wish I knew the community sooner :)
    pp7711 and Grandpa61 like this.
  2. Grandpa61

    Grandpa61 Fapstronaut

    We are here to help each other my friend. Stay strong!
    humanfirst likes this.
  3. ryan23

    ryan23 Fapstronaut

    You're not alone. One day at a time. I think we all have a lot more in common than we realize!
    humanfirst and Grandpa61 like this.
  4. Lossproof

    Lossproof Fapstronaut

  5. humanfirst

    humanfirst Fapstronaut

    Update #1
    7 days have passed since I decided to take certain actions and change my life for the better.I can say with great confidence I don't miss even a tiny bit of my old way of living.Days are no longer filled with emptiness, nor are they wasted.Pornography has been sent so very far away from what really matters to me, I don't find myself struggling to fight any urges.Of course, some dangerous thoughts come and go from time to time, but barely noticed.Whenever they arise I realise I'm getting bored and do anything just to get my attention more focused and engaged.
    Hopefully seven days from now I'll post my progress here again.I don't have a final goal in mind, so it's interesting to see where I'll eventually get.Porn is blocked at home on all devices using WiFi, which is great.The only problems are my phone's mobile data (I don't yet know how to block sites while using it) and potential relapses to thoughts instead of videos.
    If I can crush them easily seven days in a row, what's stopping me from continuing my streak?
    Grandpa61 likes this.

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