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Porn Kämpfer · Jan 20, 2020

@whiteflag70

whiteflag70 said: ↑

I miss the heartful welcome that i used to get though being single
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hi man , can u explain this more please ?

Mr.Reaper · Jan 21, 2020

whiteflag70 said: ↑

Mr Reaper,
Just be aware that there are pros and cons. ive meet some nice women before but the last one that i had sex with about 3-4 years ago was a crazy witchin, scheming "sweet as apple pie" man-user who could portray the sweetest personality a girl could have. I call her the she-devil and the sex was really good (maybe cause she had a crazy side) but thankfully i ended it cause she was nothing but trouble. If i had got her pregnant, it would be like going to jail for maybe 15-20 years. My life would be like 10x more f**ked than now and I can imagine the hell. I guess after that, i felt sex for fun wasn't really worth it or it could have been the porn use finally catching up to me. Before that, i was in a relationship with the most loyal and supportive woman that i had known. If i didn't have unsettled emotional issue and got into addictions which screwed things up, i would have spent my life with her gladly.

And its true what emptyredcloud said that we dont really know what is going on behind closed doors. Ive had friends that i thought were happilly married and suddenly divorcing cause the marriage was shit. Though i've also seen a good friend who took his career to a new level cause he had a real good woman who managed to elevate his mentality up. Some of my married friends say that i should be having fun every night but i have done the "party/f**king" thing and it's boring after awhile and the thought of coming home to an empty house makes me a bit sad sometimes. I miss the heartful welcome that i used to get though being single has given my a new perspective and it was a required journey on my growth path as i lacked certain core things in my emotional system.

I'm not totally against relationships as you can tell but Inner growth /self improvement should be our focus whether youre rich or poor, single or married. However, it doesnt mean you cant have a hobby or do something social to meet girls along the way but note that if you end up with a petty/shallow woman or a man-user (plus kids in such a situation), maybe even God can't help you.

And im not saying a person got to be 'cool' or act alpha but i feel each one of us can develop an inner confidence (thru the development of our character/personality/eq). and the confidence is genuine, like being grounded & steady for real, so no mask to wear. imho wearing a mask is not such a good idea. If youre wearing a mask then youre not developing the 'real' you. But if you already have the core confidence, then adding a lil bit of 'salt n pepper' to elevate yourself is another matter. Ignoring the "ignorant confidence of youth", if we are honest we would know for ourselves if we are steady or insecure with things in life. People said i was confident but it was fake (i didnt know at the time cause i was ignorant and it was false bravado) and i got smashed later in life/by life cause my core character had no substance.

And girls will test you. From what ive heard, its part of their subconscious survival mechanism. Take it as a compliment, if they are interested, they will test you. the 'shit' test.

p/s - excuse me for the long post. i find relationship stuff interesting.
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You are helping me alot with this Whiteflag. That is do effects me. Actually, this make me thing that relationship is allways a thing of a giant risk. That there over 100 things that can go wrong, or ever worse. Your example show me, that running after girls is not good thing. That there is better things i better follow. So i decided the one thing. I decided to learn, how to express myself perfectly. To learn how to be focus. Since calmines and goodwill is my trait characteristics, i decided to grow them. And, in the end, learn how to be good, without enyone at hand. I thing that will be better, then tring act cool. And i also hope, thing will be better when i achive University, at least becouse i planning to be much better than i am right now.
And, quastion about confidense. I, actualy do feel myself realy confident, when in small groups, or 1 on 1 coverstaions. But when deal comes to the big groupes, loud parties, or decent amount of people in general, i kind of losing my focus. My psychology basicly works in a way to concentration on single topic, or person while talking, and when there is too much of a people, its become loud, flitting all over the place, i do not like that way. Is there a way to somehow handle big amounts of loud poeple in one place?

whiteflag70 · Jan 27, 2020

Porn Kämpfer said: ↑

@whiteflag70
hi man , can u explain this more please ?
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its exactly what i said. i can have a good time outside but i miss those times when i come home and she'll be there to greet me with a warm smile and a hug. its those small things that i took for granted. fkkk......

"Your example show me, that running after girls is not good thing." well, if i can clarify, I think its important to focus on your own growth first. and along the way, if you happen to meet a nice, genuine girl, maybe making some moves ain't that bad of an idea. Back then, i was in an emotionally bad place and i was basically looking for sex and casual companionship to distract me from my pain, and im lucky i didn't get tied down by the shrewd schemin' crazy (but so good in bed) man-user that i met. I guess once you've seen the devil, you exercise a bit more caution.

If you meet girls that arent "dangerous" and you seem to have good vibes about them or with them, dont mean you cant go for coffee and enjoy their company or what not. The trouble happens when a woman becomes your whole world either because youre 'so in love' and her world becomes more important than yours or you're being used-n-abused by a man-user and you start to neglect your own time/goals and self-development.

Deleted Account · Jan 28, 2020

To abstain from sex is to know the Matrix. That is what meditation is.

Deleted Account · Feb 23, 2020

thats the plight of non chad men sadly. deal with it. i suggest you cut contact with women since they are cancerous

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