Loneliness and Sadness

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Maverix92, Aug 25, 2020.

  1. Maverix92

    Maverix92 New Fapstronaut

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    Hi guys,

    I’m currently on day 19 of noFap (My longest streak being 23 days) and am determined to reach my 30 day goal!

    I’m struggling right now with loneliness, especially as I am an only child and have few friends due to having the bad luck of having both social anxiety and Aspergers.

    I overthink situations a lot and often fall into a negative thinking pattern and can find it hard to focus on the positives in my life.

    Despite feeling like I have more energy and having a clearer mind, I still worry that I’m still single at 28 and feel like I’m either running out of time or I’ve lost my chance at finding a girlfriend.

    What kills me most is that every girl I’ve liked in the past even until most recently has never liked me back. I got my hopes up over one woman I used to know by misinterpreting her body language and the fact she was generally a touchy-feely person towards everyone as signs she was interested.
    Now I feel like shit when I checked her social media account only to find out she’s now in a relationship with another guy and even posted a selfie of the two of them together.

    I feel like giving up on love and women in general since I just end up frustrated and hurt, should I just accept that I’m probably going to end up by myself?
     
    Masked Man likes this.
  2. InappropriateUsername

    InappropriateUsername Fapstronaut

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    First thing you need to do is stop putting your value on other people’s acceptance of you. I get that it gets lonely and you want that connection but if it’s not happening, then what? You may have to wait a bit longer.

    Don’t beat yourself up about your misinterpretation—it happens. Stop beating yourself up about it and stop looking at said girl’s social media feed.

    You have few friends? Then be good to those friends and stay in touch with them.

    Social anxiety? Work on it. Get counseling from someone specializing.

    And stop thinking b/c you have Aspergers you won’t eventually get a girl. You set your limits. You determine your path.
     
  3. selfimprovementotaku

    selfimprovementotaku New Fapstronaut

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    theres plenty of people with aspergers who are successfully social in the real world, dont let a label hold you back from accomplishing great things. focus on your goals and taking care of what you need to take care of to make you happy, dont worry about other people, once you become successful and accomplish things other people will take notice and want to talk to you more, and that will allow for connections to be made.
     
  4. Loneboy

    Loneboy Fapstronaut

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    Don't overthink man.I just started to get rid of M addiction.You can be productive rather than just thinking that you are alone.I have freinds despite that i fell loneliness.Especially before sleeping,Also I like a girl but never could say that to her.I miss her too.But now i am coming back to my life.I read some manga and manhwa and watched anime whenever i felt lonely.Also sometimes i read books.Trying to see the life differently.I realised if i get everything i want,yet i will feel lonely.It is human nature.The thing you get,that doesn't hold much value later.So you will always cherish new things.Just be content what you have.One thing, there are people who are more devastated than you..so stay calm...live happily.
     
    Abel100% and Masked Man like this.
  5. JonUnder

    JonUnder New Fapstronaut

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    I had a similar situation. Good luck to you.
     
  6. Tommy34

    Tommy34 Fapstronaut

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    I'm in a similar situation. Only child and small circle of friends. The only difference between my story and yours is that you are still young! I'm currently 33 and about to turn 34. You have time to work on your craft. Set out a goal to work on yourself for the next 2 years before you hit 30. Be in the best shape of your life, be more spirtual and try to enjoy the small things in life! One thing I would tell my 28 year old self is to not worry about the future. I feel like When I was 28 I had a similar mindset as I do now at 33(to fall in love as quickly as possible and hope that the girl I find will change my life somehow). Only with my last rejection have I decided to work on myself for the month of September and see where it goes. Trust me I would love to turn back the clock and be 28 in your shoe!
     
    SeaChange likes this.

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