Loneliness is a trigger for me

I have been lonely most of my life, but fortunately I have a partner nowadays. I think if she would leave me I'd never try to find anyone else again. I'd just be porn addict no remorse with no ambition to get out of it.

How do I deal with loneliness? Probably not very well, i just got used to it. I think there were always point in my life where I realised that I am the only one who will help myself. So pulled myself together in efforts to get out of the hole that I was stuck in. Sometimes it worked so I got into new situations.

 

The way I feel is that giving into sexual desire in an inappropriate way will only make me feel more isolated, lonely and miserable - if I do feel loneliness it will only amplify the pain. Is that what you want? To bring more alienation, sorrow and misery into your life... all for the mere sake of an empty orgasm? I pass - I've had my fill of death, I don't want anymore.

 

That's a really terrible mindset, is porn induced orgasm your only hope in this life outside of being with someone? Your internal beliefs lead me to wonder if you can maintain long-term. Examine yourself.

 

@Trying_to_Quit1 I completely understand what you're dealing with. I deal loneliness a ton too. It makes me even more sexually frustrated than I already am. But right now I'm so desperate to even have just regular friend time. I don't even get that anymore. I want to talk to people and there's no one to talk to. I don't handle my loneliness well. It's the primary cause of my PMO problem.

 

I understand your frustration, but you do realize the habit is only exacerbating what you complain is causing you pain? Do you want to bring more pain and loneliness into your life? It's absurd if you think about it - the very thing you say you want, is thwarted by what you are choosing to do. And even if you do have to suffer loneliness how is PMO even remotely a solution?

 

Porn soothes the lonely without being able to fulfil them. We want to be with people, we want to be sexual. Not just watching as others copulate on the screen.

So if you are lonely, you have good reasons to PMO, but will it help you get out of that hole? No, it will rather hinder you. It works like a cushion that makes the hard ground you are on a bit more bearable.

You can stay on that cushion or do the hard work trying to get out of your misery. No one is doing that work for you, there is no guarantee that you will succeed.

I have been in that hole very deeply, and i am happy I am not in there right now. I have been without sexual partners for most of my adult life. It was horrible. All I am saying is that if I would be alone again, I would not have the strength to even try to pull myself up again. I couldn't bear the pain of trying to find another partner. I would rather be alone with porn. That is a legitimate personal choice, admittedly a weak one.

 

I realize it only makes me feel even more alone. Hence the reason I'm here and trying to quit.

Also, no, PMO isn't keeping me from getting a woman. What's keeping me from getting a woman is meeting one that is actually single as I pointed out in my other thread. I don't have social anxiety caused by my porn use. I have no trouble talking to women. I have problem with them actually seeing me as boyfriend material instead of "let's just be friends" material. I don't have a clue how to avoid the dreaded friend zone crap.

 

I can guarantee you, while PMO may not seem to be affecting your interactions with women, it is. PMO makes you effeminate and emasculates your personality, so they are picking up on it in a big way.

 

It does not do that to me. You do not even know me and here you are saying I act like less of a man and more like a woman because of my PMO problem. How on earth can you possibly come to such a conclusion without even knowing me?